the macaronis are out there

had a dream that I met a wizard and we fell in love and became unhealthily attached to each other so we decided to meld into one single creature together but the process was horrifically slow and painful and most of the dream was us lying in bed holding hands while lesions opened up in our skin and seeped out blue and green fluid and the wizard said "this is going to take a very very long time" and I said "that's ok"

the critics are raving

I’m unafraid to show how deeply this resonates with me

Ch🤣

Based on this

Xbox cats!!!

glad that im not popular enough to have an evil shadow version of my blog that exists just to make contradictions on my posts

i watch baseball for the side quests

throwback to 2021 when the exact same player started doing this extended water bottle bincoculars sight gag in the dugout

this is the same guy who also made himself a fruit cocktail midgame. he is The manic pixie dream girl

baseball is actually not a sport it’s just a documentary of human nature and how we battle boredom. the stuff these teams get up to while they’re waiting their turn.

and it’s hilarious when they pull pranks on each other, like attaching things to other people’s caps:

or the beloved hot foot prank:

or when they decided to put a guy’s pants over his head and make it seem like he was walking on his hands:

or when they opposing pitchers took turns playing tic tac toe every time they got on the mound:

HELLO ?

Help I got the Temu labiaplasty and now my pussy is on backwards

happy annoy squidward day

Actually, Annoy Squidward Day is January 15th. Although the calendar doesn’t have the month written on it, if you continue to watch the episode, they’re competing for January’s Employee of the Month.

I’ve been waiting all year to reblog this

The Golem Rises

It was unnecessary to depict the plaster being poured in his ass but I do appreciate the artists choice to do so anyways

The front door of my drug shed

Sephora has a lotion that attracts horny spiders out right now isnt life interesting

Like isnt life just grand

we need more dials and knobs and levers again. this world is lacking in dials and knobs and levers. it's one of our biggest issues.