part of my nimona viewing experience. idk why but i got super emotional in the first five minutes.
Hot damn. Great question, I'd love to tell you.
High Fantasy
Look, this rainfrog is called Breviceps bagginsi, so I don't have a lot of choice, now do I?
[src]
Also, I would go with them to the end. Into the very fires of Mordor.
Low Fantasy
Phyllomedusine hylids have a certain weird clown marionette vibe to them. Just look at these Pithecopus rohdei.
[src]
Lovecraftian
The male Rhinoderma darwinii raises his tadpoles in his vocal sac.
Sci-Fi
Gephyromantis pseudoasper sometimes wear handsome stripes—very Space Age™
But more importantly, their calls evoke a battle with laser-blasters.
I filmed this calling male in 2017 at an obscene hour of the morning.
Horror
Trichobatrachus robustus, aka the Hairy Frog, has flanks and thighs covered in weird, hair-like outgrowths that increase oxygen exchange over its skin, and BREAKS ITS FINGERS TO STAB YOU WITH CLAWS MADE OF BONE
[src]
Romance
Breviceps males physically glue themselves to the back-ends of females, and if that's not romance, I don't know what is.
[src]
Comedy
Nyctimantis arapapa are probably amongst the funniest-looking frogs out there.
[src]
Adult
The 'poly' in Polypedates may be a double entendre
[src]
Crime and Mystery
Calyptocephalella gayi is a Galaxy Brain frog.
[src]
Speculative
Myobatrachus gouldii is basically what would happen if you decided to try to build a turtle, but you only had frog pieces in the kit.
[src]
my friend asked me to pretend to be her boyfriend because her parents are homophobic af but they ended up hating me so much that they were glad when she said she was gay task failed successfully
okay so
- be a goth. conservative christian parents don't approve of goth men. show up to their house wearing all kinds of satanic symbols if you can
- know more about religion than the parents. they'll try to introduce you to christianity because you don't exactly look like a christian but your dad's an ex priest and has a phd in theology so *cracks knuckles* you'll correct them on every little mistake they make
- call your fake girlfriend every annoying petname under the sun. i'm talking about babu, shmoopie, snuffleupagus. when you run out of annoying english terms of endearment call her shit like "my liver" or "my little cabbage" (actual greek terms of endearments but the parents won't know this they'll just think you're annoying :3)
- to continue this, talk to your fake girlfriend in the most high pitched annoying voice possible but talk in your regular voice to everyone else
stare at her older brother's ass for just a little too long- have an annoying laugh. think of sybil fawlty but a stereotypical villain playing a church organ in his castle
- let them quote bible verses to you. then ask "so when were those two destroyed for sodomy?". it's very funny to do this when judas kisses jesus, and it's even funnier when you've just corrected them over a minor mistake in church history
- ask WHY abraham was begging for sodom. it doesn't make sense to you why a good christian man would go and beg for tha-
- be over possessive of your fake gf (dont really do this, it's just an act)
go and fuck her brother in an alleyway.the parents won't know about this so it's an optional step- use words no one knows the meaning of. do this without realising because you always talk like that
- just be yourself! that's enough on its own to make them despise you tbh
yes
i kissed him on the lips infront of his parents and claimed it was the usual greek greeting between men is that enough for you
Are you…. Are you secretly dating her brother OP?
yes
I wonder why
Show up again to admit to dating the brother, but dress like a typical suburbanite and act like you've never met the parents before. Absolute power move.
asdgfgsjfh im totally doing this
want an update?
ofc you do
but i'm too tired to write all of what happened down right now so instead try to imagine the most awkward situation you've ever been in.
now multiply the awkwardness by 100
first of all i'm just gonna show the difference in what i was wearing
an example of what i would wear as my friend's fake bf:
and as my boyfriend's actual bf:
when my bf and i showed up his dad did such a double take
sooo yeah my bf told his parents he's gay, they looked surprised but told him it was fine... then they shared a look of pure horror (seriously, it was like they had just found out they're in the matrix) and said
"and uh. why is...he here?"
i went and introduced myself like we had never met before and said i was their son's boyfriend
:3
i've never seen two people look more angry before but they weren't gonna say anything because they had other family members over
the family members who had never met me before and therefore knew nothing about the fake relationship thing started asking me what faith i am. i said i was raised protestant, though i'm not very religious now, but that's something i want to change. i had never mentioned anything about being a protestant before and i had said several times that my family was greek orthodox but gaslight gatekeep girlboss
aaaand then the awkwardness began. those were probably the most awkward minutes of my life (we didn't stay for long because i thought the dad was gonna hit me [he probably was. i saw him clenching his fists several times]) and i don't think anyone has ever looked at me with such murderous intent as my bf's parents
update two electric boogaloo ig
i have a girlfriend now🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️
laserscrewdriver
AVENGE ME HAMLET FOR I WAS KILLED BY YOUR UNCLE, AND MY BROTHER
A MOST FOWL AND UNNATURAL MURDER
Even Weird Al has had that™ experience with Tony Hawk
Tony Hawk IS Forrest Gump
So I looked up why and how this happened, and it turns out Weird Al hired a company called Birdhouse Skateboards to provide some “skate/punk” extras for the video. Birdhouse Skateboards is a company started by Tony Hawk, so not only did Weird Al end up putting Tony Hawk in his video without realizing it, he actually hired Tony Hawk’s company without realizing it! And then Tony Hawk just decided to go along as one of the extras himself.
BTW, he’d already won like 40 contests already, some of them international skateboarding contests. So it’s not like Weird Al cast some unknown skateboarder who ended up becoming World Famous Skateboarder, he was already well known and was running his own Skateboarding company.
Think of it this way. This wasn’t ‘Weird Al got Tony Hawk to be in his video’, this was ‘Tony Hawk found a way to be in a Weird Al Video.’
The chance that Tony Hawk has infiltrated your location or piece of media is low
BUT NEVER ZERO.
Hello white mutuals. Before you is a charcuterie board with 15 different types of cheese. If you manage to go 12 hours without touching the cheeses you can leave this room. Good luck.
spockhatesterfs
I was eating off this cool cheese plate while you were talking can you repeat that pls
In 1960, SAG and WGA struck to force management to adapt to the new technology of television. Without that strike and the agreement it birthed, residual use payments would not exist.
My parents stole nearly all of my salary from my entire childhood. My Star Trek residuals were all I had, and they kept me afloat for two decades while I rebuilt my life. I have healthcare and a pension because of my union. The AMPTP billionaires want to take all that security away so they can give CEOs even more grotesque wealth at the expense of the people who make our industry run.
To give some sense of what is at stake: There are actors who star in massively successful, profitable, critically acclaimed shows that are all on streaming services. You see them all the time. They are famous, A-list celebrities. Nearly all of those actors don't earn enough to qualify for health insurance, because the studios forced them to accept a buyout for all their residuals (decade of reuse, at the least) that is less than I earned for one week on TNG. And I was the lowest paid cast member in 1988. They want to do this while studio profits and CEO compensation are at historic highs.
I mean, if not now, when? And I haven't even touched on AI and working conditions.
We must fight for the future of our industry in the face of changing technology, the same way our elders did in 1960. So today, my Spacemom and I went to the place where it started for us, way back when, to do just that.
I see all your support. It means so much. Thank you.
Anonymous asked:
I’ve seen you use the terms “hot reading”, “cold reading”, and “hard reading” in the past- what do those mean? Are the other kinds?
SKKSJDJDJJD okok
"Hot Reading" is a term from con artistry. It refers to tricking someone after you've done some background research on them that allows you to target your pitch more effectively. I.e. I'm a charismatic preacher who knows you're gonna come to my show, so I look at your Facebook to see that you had a recent death in the family, who I will pretend to conjure onstage.
Conversely, "cold reading" is when you don't prepare at all, using common tactics and lowest-common-denominator techniques. If I'm that same charismatic preacher, I channel a grandparent, because statistically you'll have at least one dead grandparent.
A "Hard Read" is not a con artist term. That's from fighting games. It refers to knowing an opponent so well, that you are able to predict what option they will perform next, i.e. beating someone at rock paper scissors because you know what they'll choose next.
MEDIUM: I feel someone among us tonight...who has suffered a great loss. You sir!
ME: Me? I have! My grandmother just died. We were very close, it was very trag
MEDIUM: TATSUMAKI SENPUKYA!!!
the notes are so right. You don't bother to check every egg until the day one is cracked.
One time I ran into Alice Cooper at my local grocery store and he was checking the eggs so you really do need to check every egg.
that last line hits like a punch to the face
yuri is when there’s themes and motifs and yaoi is when there’s two blokes who do fuck all. if you reblog this you love trans people
The Daily Times, New Philadelphia, Ohio, July 9, 1924
theroomyouneverenter
whoever wrote this paper has the funniest phrasing possible
happy turtle bit off a cop’s toe in the hudson river day for those who celebrate