The one thing that I absolutely adore about the Weekenders is Tino’s mom. She was such a great role model for Tino and she tried to be the best mom she could be under the cirumstances. But this photoset really gets me is how understanding Tino’s mom is about what Tino is going through, and that what he’s going through is perfectly normal and what he’s feeling is normal.
What Tino’s mom does in the beginning is that she makes the winter solstice seem so incredibly important (it kinda is) because it helps bring something nice and warm and feely into the mix to replace a holiday that Tino is just going to feel sad about if he thinks about his dad not being there. She doesn’t try to replace his dad or anything, but she gives Tino an alternative to get away from the sad during the holiday season. She gently brings it up that Tino can remove his dad’s sock as to not feel sad when he looks at it. Not saying that his dad isn’t here let’s just get rid of the sock but let’s remove it so we don’t feel sad. And that is important.
Parents try to place the blame on one or the other during a divorce and make it seem like the other is the bad guy. Tino’s mom obviously got custody but she doesn’t make it seem like Tino’s dad is some evil villain. She brings it up that it’s okay to feel sad that Tino’s dad isn’t there. Not that he did something wrong or that she immediately puts it in there that Tino’s dad did something wrong, but that this is a time of the year to be happy with family around you and that its. okay. to. be. feeling. sad.
And then this flawless woman says that if Tino’s mad. at. her. it’s. okay. That he can come talk to her and say that he doesn’t like her at the time because this happened. That she says that yes, a part of this divorce includes me, and not just the bad end with your father. Tino might have felt angry with her because she got him and his dad didn’t. That happens. And Tino’s mom said that it was okay to be mad with him! This was so important to me when I found out about this because it meant that people were allowed to feel mad about things, even if those people who they were getting mad at didn’t always have a choice, or coudn’t make another choice.
And the last thing she does is that she acknowledges that her bad joke about Tino’s dad, and she doesn’t dwell on it. She says sorry and then works hard to make it better for Tino during this hard time. Because yeah, he’s a kid, he wants his family with him for the holidays but he can’t. So making Tino happy and have him grow up healthy and not resentful to either parent was something Tino’s mom did flawlessly. She had her own grudges with his dad, but didn’t want that to get in the way with Tino’s relationship with his dad. She wanted him to be happy, and keeping his dad in his life made him happy so goddamn she’s gonna grin and bear it for Tino.
Ms Tonitini was written as a golden model woman who deserves thousands of awards because she was understanding, kind, and she helped Tino the best she could. Best Mom Ever.
