The Haddocks
(ff.net link if you prefer to read there!)
Astrid was exhausted. Covered in sweat and still some blood, though Valka had cleaned most of it. Hair clinging to her neck with an uncomfortable wetness, eyes full of tears and begging to close for a few hours. And yet she had absolutely no desire to give in. She stared at the very small child in her arms, thanking the gods he was safe despite coming early into this world. And he was quite small; Astrid’s heart all but caved in on itself when Valka laid the tiny babe on her chest. The fear in Astrid’s eyes must’ve been obvious. Valka tried to reassure her, “It’s not a death sentence, Astrid. Hiccup was just as small when he came into this world, and look where he is now. This little boy will be no different.”
She heard Hiccup’s breath catch, getting a good look at the boy over Astrid’s shoulder, but she couldn’t bring herself to look at him. All she could focus on was the rapid rise and fall of her son’s chest, silently urging him to keep breathing. She hadn’t realized she had been crying until Hiccup caught a tear off her cheek. He sat on the bed beside his wife, wishing she would slow her breathing, begging the take the pain in her eyes away.
Astrid felt her husband’s arm wrap around her, eyes still secured on the tiny chest of her son. The extra body heat made Astrid uncomfortably warm again, but she didn’t care. If Hiccup was still comforting her, maybe it meant he wasn’t angry with her…
Hiccup kissed her hair, ignoring the wetness that met his lips, and gently squeezed her shoulders. “It’s alright, we’ll be okay,” he whispered over her shoulder. He freed one arm and slowly reached out to their baby boy, lightly grazing the side of his finger against his pink cheeks. The boy’s face scrunched in displeasure, mouth opening wide but no sound escaping. “We’ll all be okay.”
But Astrid still couldn’t help worrying. She cradled the boy to her chest - gods, a boy, she had given her husband a son! Securing him easily in one arm, she grazed the dusting of blonde hair atop his head with her free hand. The boy recoiled at the touch for a moment, but quickly settled back against his mother’s touch. She couldn’t stop thinking back over Zephyr’s birth, comparing in her mind how much smaller this boy currently in her arms was compared to her daughter.
She had tried so hard to keep her emotions together, but she couldn’t hold on. She let a small sob escape her chest, praying Hiccup didn’t notice.
But of course he did. He squeezed her shoulders and pulled her gently into his chest, being careful not to jostle her too much. “Hey… Astrid, what’s wrong? Are you in pain?”
She pursed her lips, letting the tears fall. “I’m so sorry.”
Her voice was so quiet Hiccup thought he misheard her. He paused for a moment before saying with a chuckle, “Astrid, I already got my baby girl. Why are you apologizing for giving me a boy? I thought that’s what you were hoping for.”
She shook her head slowly. “But… He’s so small… I… I tried so hard to… To…”
Hiccup was quiet again, which Astrid took as confirmation that he was in fact upset with her.
“Astrid…” She braced herself for… Well, she wasn’t sure what she was bracing for. She’d rarely seen Hiccup angry, and it had never been directed at her or their daughter. But whatever she was ready for, it never came. He held her tighter, speaking in breathless shock. “Ast… That’s not your fault…”
The words only made her sob again. She endangered their son, she didn’t want his sympathy! He deserved to be angry with her. But he wasn’t, and it almost made her angry instead.
“Astrid, please, don’t blame yourself for this,” he softly begged. “These things… Th-they just happen, you can’t control it. He’s going to be okay.”
“How do you know that?” Astrid replied shortly, though all force was lost as she spoke through tears.
“Because I did, just like my mom said.” He reached around her back and then up to brush the stray hair from her forehead before resting a hand on the side of her head, pulling hers gently to rest against his own. His free arm wrapped around Astrid’s arms, cradling them along with his son. “And besides, he’s got something that I didn’t have. He’s half you.” Astrid turned her head now, looking at her husband for the first time since her boy was laid on her chest. She lifted one corner of her mouth and craned her neck to kiss him. Hiccup happily obliged, meeting her halfway. “I’m going to get Zephyr, alright? She’s been anxious about how you two are doing. Are you going to be okay for a minute?”
Astrid bit her lip and looked back at her son, watching the rise and fall of his chest again. She nodded slowly. “Just for a minute.”
Hiccup hooked a finger under her chin to guide her face towards his. “No more blaming, alright?” he softly ordered.
She nodded. Hiccup smiled and brushed his lips against hers before lifting himself off the bed and disappearing down the stairs.
Astrid glanced around the room. Valka must have slipped out after Hiccup sat down with Astrid because the room was empty. But her glance snapped back down to her small son when a short whimper escaped his lips. “It’s alright, it’s okay little one. Momma’s here,” Astrid cooed. The baby in her arms calmed instantly, reaching his arms out towards the source of the voice. Astrid smiled and carefully lifted the babe so she could lean over and brush her lips against his forehead. She felt his small hands rubbing against her neck and chin, and pulled back to see yet again the face of displeasure he had when Hiccup brushed his cheek.
Astrid chuckled. “You’ll have to get used to it, sweetheart. We’re a cuddly family.” Her smile slowly faded as she continued to look at her son, finding herself fixating on his size yet again. “I’m so sorry, baby boy,” she whispered. “I promise, we’re going to get through this. I’m not going to let anything happen to you. You’re going to grow up to be a big, strong man just like your Daddy.”
The babe yawned and continued reaching towards his mother’s voice. Astrid smiled, focusing on the warmth emanating from his small body and the small sounds he made as he explored the new world around him in his own way.
She didn’t look away until she heard a small gasp from the doorway. Her husband walked in slowly, holding their daughter in his arms and watching her reaction as she took in the sight of the small boy in her mother’s arms. Astrid carefully slid over to make room for the rest of her family.
“Momma!” Zephyr said quietly.
“Zephyr!” Astrid replied with a smile. “Come here, sweetheart. Do you want to see your baby brother?”
Zephyr nodded, eyes wide and lips pursed in anticipation. Hiccup brought her to the bed and sat next to his wife, letting Zephyr climb across his lap and down onto the bed. She perched up on her knees so she could glance over her mother’s arms to the babe now sleeping against Astrid’s chest. “He’s little, Momma,” she said, voice dripping in awe.
“He is very little, so we have to be careful with him, okay?” Astrid said. She secured her son in one arm so she could wrap her daughter up in the other, kissing her hair. “What do you think, Zeph?”
Zephyr’s eyes never left her little brother. She sniffled, causing Astrid and Hiccup to share a worried glance. “Zephyr? Sweetie, what’s wrong?” Hiccup asked.
Zephyr sniffed again. “I love him so much,” she said.
Astrid’s eyes were filled with tears yet again, and she looked up at her husband to see his were brimming with tears as well. They smiled at each other, and neither had to speak for them to know they were so proud of each other for raising such a sweet little girl, and even more proud of their little girl herself.
Astrid kissed Zephyr’s hair again. “I love him so much too, sweetheart. Just like I love you.”
Zephyr beamed up at her mother. “I love you too, Momma.” She looked down at her baby brother, taking in his small hands and little mouth and button nose. She began almost vibrating before she bolted up and hugged her mother’s neck. “Thank you Momma, thank you so much!”
Astrid and Hiccup both reached out their hands to hold onto Zephyr, taken off guard by her sudden movement and not wanting her to hit the baby boy. But when her words reached their ears, they both simply smiled. Astrid hugged Zephyr back tightly, and Hiccup slid closer to wrap his two favorite girls and his brand new son in his arms.
The Haddocks didn’t leave that embrace until the sun began to set that day. Each of them were overflowing with love, and none of them could think of a better way to express that intense joy than cuddling together until the exhaustion of the day overtook the four of them.
A small cry woke Zephyr, and she opened her eyes to find the room blanketed in orange from the setting sun. She looked up to find her mother and father sleeping on either side of her; Daddy’s arm was reached over Zephyr’s head and underneath Momma’s neck. Momma had one hand resting on Daddy’s arm next to her cheek. Zephyr smiled at the sight. She always loved seeing how much Momma and Daddy loved each other, knowing that not all the other mommies and daddies in the village loved each other like hers did.
Zephyr heard the small cry again, pulling her gaze away from her parents. Her baby brother was wiggling around in his cradle, wide awake again. Zephyr rubbed the sleep from her eyes and carefully crawled to the end of the bed and hopping down, not wanting to wake her parents. She padded over to the cradle (not necessarily in a straight line) and kneeled down on the floor. “’S okay, budder,” she said, sleep heavily affecting her words. “I love you, ’s okay.”
She lazily leaned her head on the side of the cradle and reached her hand out to her baby brother. She tried to hold his hand but found his was much smaller than hers. She instead slipped her thumb under his fingers and loosely wrapped her fingers around his hand and wrist, figuring it was as close as she would get to holding his hand. The babe calmed eventually while his sister cooed comforting words, yawning occasionally between phrases. “I’m your big sisser. I dun wan ‘nuffing to happen to you. ‘Nuffink…” she said, the last word distorted even more through a big yawn.
Astrid opened her eyes to see Hiccup already awake on the bed next to her and her daughter no longer laying between them. But Hiccup was focused on something across the room, trying his best to keep very still; Astrid followed suit. That was when Astrid heard her daughter speaking to her son. The babe had calmed completely and Zephyr seemed to be asleep on the side of the cradle.
Hiccup smiled, trying to hold back a chuckle. When he was sure she was asleep, he looked down at his wife who was eyeing him curiously. “She dun’ wan’ ‘nuffink to happen to him,” he quietly repeated, letting the chuckle escape.
Astrid smacked his arm, but smiled at him, whispering, “Stop it, she’s sleepy.” She turned her head to sneak a peek at her children, her heart swelling when she found Zephyr’s hand wrapped around her brother’s, the boy’s hand clutching her thumb, both children sound asleep. She turned back to Hiccup, who was lovingly watching his children as well. He looked back to Astrid with the dorkiest grin she’d ever seen on his face. Astrid’s face fell just a little bit.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Hiccup asked, reaching out with his other hand to lift her chin.
Astrid looked away, sighing. “He looks like a little ‘nuffink’” she said, tears in her eyes again.
Hiccup sighed too. “Ast, we talked about this. He’ll be fine, just like I was.”
“Yeah, but what if he turns out just like you did.”
Hiccup scoffed. “Oh, ouch, that was not cool. I thought you liked all this raw Viking-ness,” he joked.
Astrid was completely serious, looking in his eyes now. “What if he turns out to be so much littler than everyone else and all the other kids make fun of him for it?”
Hiccup pursed his lips. He knew what she meant, but Hiccup was trying not to focus on that right now. Right now, he just wanted to worry about his son’s health and wellbeing. He knew they’d cross that bridge when they got to it. So instead, he smiled and continued joking, trying to lift his wife’s mood. “I mean, if we name him 'nuffink’ then the kids can’t call him that behind his back.”
Astrid rolled her eyes. “I’m not naming my son 'Nothing’,” she said, but the corner of her mouth twitched up.
“Excuse you, I didn’t say 'Nothing’, I said 'Nuffink’,” he replied, imitating the overly sleepy tone of his daughter. He nodded and gestured toward their sleeping children. “I think Zephyr agrees with me. It’s a good name.”
“It’s a ridiculous name,” Astrid said, fully smiling now.
“Yeah, because Hiccup is a glorious name,” Hiccup said, rolling his eyes.
Astrid chuckled and shook her head. But Hiccup could see the glint of consideration in her eyes. He was only joking, but a part of him thought the name just… Fit.
He leaned over and kissed her forehead. “We have a few days still to think it over.”
Astrid chuckled and rolled her eyes. “You mean fink it over.”
Hiccup smiled that dorky smile that melted Astrid’s heart every time, glad to hear her joking again. “That’s my girl.”
