Doing Something

i’ve been workshopping this idea for like three days and i think i finally cracked the code

They’re in a band together

Toots, Tinkles, and the Almighty Funk Engine

Ladies and gentlemen! Give it up for Toots, Tinkles, and the Almighty FUNK ENGINE!!

I made Gary (my gecko) a tiny Tallis and yarmulke for Rosh Hashanah and he wished u all happy new year

Happy Rosh Hashanah again from OP of the shalomander

as much as the concept of Jesus being a fairly normal lad has its charms, im personally very intrigued by the idea of him being just… extremely weird. not even in a mystical sense, just…….staggeringly BIZZARRE. 

you go to the well to get some water, and here’s Miriam’s boy, staring at the sky, completely still. his expression is unreadable. you hazard a hello and ask how he’s doing, and he slowly, unblinkingly, lowers his gaze on you (he’s 8 and is missing his frontal teeth, not that this is making you any less uncomfortable) and says “I cannot speak of the state of my being, Nathan son of Saul, my brother, but rejoice for the water you shall take today will be as pure as the soul of the children of Heaven”

…you start sweating

normal person in 1st century Nazareth: making my way downtown, walking fast

*sees J boy, 8 yo, staring at you from across the street*

normal person: walking faster 

even funnier, the only person 100% on board with his Prophetic Kid Talk is his mother Miriam, an otherwise placid, absolutely normal woman around 25 or so

kid JC, coming home at twilight, a single white dove following him and chirping with weirdly human-like precision:

 moth̫́er,̦͌ ̮̉i h͙̉av͔̽e ͓͗b̘̃r̞̓o̮͘u̲̒gh̟͒t̺́ you a do̗͐ṽ͙e̢͘ ͈̾m͒͢a͈̽dē̝ ỏ̘f ͈̓c̆͜l͔̂aỷ͇ aṋ̑d̳̿ g͢͞i̹̾fted̖͡ ̻͐it ͓͂w̖̿it̎͜h t̥̃h͙͒e ̨̒m̧̂i̡̍ŗ͒â̫cḷ̔è̤ ̛̻of̞̅ l̘̈i̛̦fè̳

Miriam: ! that’s my little boy :) now let’s go get ready for dinner :) 

her husband Yosef, a carpenter who only marginally got signed up for this: 

This post is so Christian, but it’s the spicy kind of Christian that gets you murdered by other Christians for heresy, so I’m torn.

literally biggest form of compliment i’ve ever gotten

that means the angels are babysitters then

here have more

You guys really need to read Christopher Moore’s Lamb, if you haven’t.

Always reblog Cryptid Jesus

I made more. cause it’s fun

I love that you guys used their actual names

I did not consider Eldritch Baby Jesus.

God I know you have a sense of humor because otherwise there’s no explanation for the platypus and I hope it extends to comics about baby cryptid Jesus

he was in arthur.

you're thinking of Jill Eikenberry; I think this guy was an astronaut of some kind

that's Neil Armstrong, I thought this guy was in How I Met Your Mother

That's Neil Patrick Harris. I think this might have been the playwright who wrote The Odd Couple.

That’s Neil Simon. I think this is the musician who wrote Sweet Caroline.

That’s Neil Diamond. I think this is an astrophysicist

That’s Neil deGrasse Tyson. I think this is a river in Egypt.

That's the Nile; I think this is the Irish guy who made the movies "The Crying Game" and "Interview with the Vampire".

No no no, that’s Neil Jordan. I think this is the English author who helped write Good Omens.

You’re right! This is Terry Prachet’s tumblr. Good job everyone

ok I love this meme but like

Neil Gaiman actually was in Arthur.

This is true.

Capitalism will put the bill on your grave and harass your grieving family until they pay

One of my cousins passed away unexpectedly at the age of 35, and had been paying back a loan from the bank. About two weeks after his death, my great aunt received a statement from the bank (his mail was being delivered to her house) about a late payment. She called the bank and explained the situation and the only thing a manager could say was “Well, that’s unfortunate. We can arrange so payments will resume in 30 days, that should be enough time to have already paid for the other arrangements.”

On top of the unexpected $10,000 funeral, cremation and burial bill, my aunt had to finish paying my uncle’s $5,000 loan. She’s a disabled retiree, on a fixed income, and could barely afford to pay for her insulin for diabetes. She nearly lost her home of more than 40 years. Fuck the system.

She didn’t need to pay. When people die, their debts are not their family’s responsibility.

In fact, it is outright illegal to try and collect those debts from a person who didn’t cosign the loan and isn’t executing the will.

Banks count on people not knowing that last comment so that they can still get money

They really do.

My great-grandmother had her identity stolen before she died at the age of 93, and thousands of charges were racked up on credit cards in her name. After she passed away, they called my mother to try and collect. My mom laughed at them, and told them: “She’s dead, good luck collecting.” The credit card asked my mother, “Don’t you want to clear your grandmother’s debts? Don’t you want to clear her good name?” My mom laughed at them again. “No,” she said. “Because a 90 year old wasn’t watching porn with those credit cards, and her name is fine. Don’t give credit cards to old women likely to pass away soon. This is on you.”

Which is how I learned as a young child to always question collection agents, and to never pay off debts that aren’t your own. They often can’t even collect that money from the estate, if there is one, depending on how you write your will and what kind of account the money was kept in.

DO NOT EVER PAY OFF DEBTS THAT AREN’T YOUR OWN.

If a loved one of yours dies and bill collectors (credit cards, loans, etc etc) start calling you off the hook and request that you pay off their debts, tell them in no uncertain terms to go fuck themselves.

The reason being is that the moment you give them a single penny, that debt is now on YOU because you’ve now agreed to pay it off.

Do not agree to pay off their debt. Do not pass go, do not give them $200.

Boosting this to let people know that if any of these greedy little dog-fuckers start harassing them to pay off a relatives debt the correct thing to do is just tell them to piss off and not pay them a single thing

And that there is NOTHING they can do if you do this

Never, ever, EVER pay so much as a single cent on a debt owed by someone who’s passed away. You make even a single payment and that’s considered you accepting responsibility for the debt, and they can then legally expect you to repay the whole thing.

They’re like vampires - they can’t collect unless you let them in. Don’t invite them in.

DO NOT EVER PAY OFF DEBTS THAT AREN’T YOUR OWN. 

DO NOT EVER PAY OFF DEBTS THAT AREN’T YOUR OWN. 

DO NOT EVER PAY OFF DEBTS THAT AREN’T YOUR OWN. 

DO NOT EVER PAY OFF DEBTS THAT AREN’T YOUR OWN.

and DON’T consolidate your student loans with your significant other!  if something happens to them you are legally on the hook for that money!

Do not ever pay off debts that aren’t your own! The caveat to this, which often gets omitted (because for most people who it doesn’t apply), is that if your deceased relative has a positive net worth, and is leaving money/property for someone to inherit, their debts DO get taken out of that. So in that case you should still NEVER EVER pay their debts out of your own pocket, but the executor of the estate will have to pay them out of the estate. (But you still do not have to pay debts incurred due identity theft, obviously; and once you formally notify creditors of the deceased’s passing, you should not be on the hook for any charges after that either.)

sweet mother of Christ, make sure you have a will

i think the death note probably doesnt go by “legal” name but rather the name you tie your identity and self image with, and it makes no sense for the death note to abide by laws constructed by humans anyway. so i think that if youre trans youre safe from light yagami because hes transphobic and wouldnt write your actual name in it even if it was life or death

this person gets it

The FUNNIEST part about this is that it implies that writing “L” into the Death Note very well could have worked depending on the level of identity he associates with it and he was too stupid to even try

his dad’s a cop he doesn’t know how to think

Not to get emo on main but you ever think about how the troop sang about their dreams of finding “a girl worth fighting for”, and they think their girl worth fighting for is one of romance, but the song abruptly comes to a halt when they find a different girl worth fighting for.

A tiny girl that had been killed at the hands of the Huns. A child too weak, too small to have any chance of withstanding the murderous invaders. That is their girl worth fighting for.

This is fucking horrific

It’s also worth noting that ‘A Girl Worth Fighting For’ is the last song in the movie. Up until here, it’s a fun movie, and the imminent invasion feels like it’s just there to keep the plot moving, and to provide a little bit of drama to spice things up. None of the soldier’s are quite taking this seriously yet; sure, Mulan wanted to save her father from the draft, and on some level she was aware that he would die if he went to war, but beyond that she’s interested in not being caught, and not shaming her family. Her motives are good, but they’re entirely self centered. All the other soldiers are more or less in the same boat - they want to get tougher, they want to impress girls, they want to be cool soldiers. Shang’s easily the most serious of the bunch at first, and even then it’s just because training bad soldiers will reflect poorly on him, and important people are paying attention.

The abrupt ending of ‘A Girl Worth Fighting For’ is the wake up call. The soldiers and the audience get slapped in the face with the realization of what’s really at stake here. China is being invaded. Villages are burning, civilians are dying, and this isn’t going to stop until the country is conquered or the invaders are defeated. This is not a fun musical, this is a major crisis.

Mulan is such a good movie for so many reasons, but the abrupt tone shift is such a major reason why. It’s an excellent commentary on the reality of war, and it being a kids movie just meant they had to make their point without showing any actual gore, which I’d honestly say makes it that much more poignant.

That moment, when they come over the rise and see the razed village is one of the best scenes in film. Period. Somehow, instead of giving me tonal whiplash, it took my breath away, and that’s one fuck of a balancing act.

obi-wan is my favorite character in anything ever because the cosmic forces that control the universe literally have it in for him specifically and this is something thats flat out stated on multiple occasions and literally everyone knows including obi-wan himself but he just keeps on sadly careening from one disaster to another as everyone he cares about dies in increasingly horrible and tragic ways while wisecracking every 5 minutes like it’s going out of style and somehow managing to become the sluttiest magic monk in the galaxy to cope. icon.

Obi-wan, covered in his own blood, laying on the ground: maybe, if i lay very still, the force won’t see me, for five minutes.

For those of you who may not be aware, in Scotland there is an officially registered tartan called Pride of LGBT.

@thebibliosphere

This is so cool, because tartan patterns were originally family symbols. Almost every Scottish clan has a unique one. Even my family has one. It’s like saying LGBT+ is a family, one you can belong to even if your blood family doesn’t accept you.

Um, I'mma need a kilt in this tartan like YESTERDAY.

I just want to add in here that specific tartan patterns being associated with a family or clan is a somewhat recent phenomenon. Long before that it was a matter of personal taste and an expression of social/economic status. The more colours you had in your tartan, the richer you were. Certain dyes were also difficult and expensive to obtain. You didn’t have red unless you were very wealthy and powerful, and you definitely didn’t have purple unless you were richer than god. 

This is basically the fanciest, most extravagant tartan imaginable. If you went back in time to like medieval Scotland wearing this everyone would lose their minds. 

“w-wait…!”

I have no idea who Peenythus is

How the fuck do you not know who Prometheus is 

Do I look like a Greek Mythologist

all you need to know is guy gets his liver eaten by big bird every day

So it’s not Greek Mythology?

Wait why the fuck is big bird eating his liver

It is Greek mythology, it’s A LARGE BIRD. NOT BIGBIRD. I REPEAT, NOT BIGBIRD

The Batman’s Grave #10 (2020)

alfred said sit down

The Department of Fisheries in Hyderabad, India, is shaped like a fish.

finally, some good fucking architecture

AU where Sokka’s high-on-cactus-juice encounter with the giant mushroom takes a dark turn. (Also he has a gun)

based on this beautiful tumblr post

bonus:

TWILIGHT (2008) THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY | “Öga for Öga” (2020)

Malcolm In The Middle (2000-2006)

Mario Kart 8, 2014

boop-boop-a-doop

ESPECIALLY SINCE HER CHARACTER ACTUALLY IS BASED ON AN AFRICAN AMERICAN WOMAN: ESTHER JONES.

THANK YOU FOR THIS!!

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

happy black history month

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