All that important mischief-making tires a baby out.
also literally fucked a man so hard yesterday that today i found pieces of my bed on the floor
I read this too fast and thought it said “pieces of him on the floor”
truly no video game moment will ever surpass the part in portal 2 where glados says "well, this is the part where he kills us" and wheatley says "hello, this is the part where i kill you" and you unlock the achievement titled "the part where he kills you" (description: this is that part) and the chapter title appears on the screen and reads: chapter nine: the part where he kills you
ironbaddie-deactivated20210315
me at taco bell ordering a chicken quesadilla “WITH. Large Soda”
Woo Brain: "My home is haunted"
Rational Brain: "Most ghost phenomena is explained by infrasound and carbon monoxide leaks"
Wizard Brain: "Ghosts are made of infrasound and carbon monoxide."
old boys
it took me 3 times reading this post to realized that (wild) meant living in the wild and wasn’t just a casual remark on the longevity of these organisms
jdlaclede
Maximum longevity: 15,000 years (shit dude)
This isn't cute! Cars only do this when they feel extreme distress!
Maan get that quivering snout outta here
From twitter
I got THE worst possible Tumblr ad
I'm gonna put it under the cut for the daring. I will say, Tumblr sure is a lot more lenient with advertisers violating their community guidelines.
This is the men’s tits website but what
Proper moon knight by Mike Franchina via ImaginaryAstronauts
A crested eagle tangled up with a snake in battle
the Aztec were right, that is absolutely an omen worth building a city for
she's 100% correct btw and a lot of you are one carefully-worded pitch away from chucking away every ounce of autonomy your forebears threw themselves under cars and racehorses to grant you
She deleted these follow-up tweets to the one above, but yeah she's absolutely right all the way around.
