Avatar

hedo knee carrots

@hedonicarus

or hedonnakerus/hedosaurus-rex/hidonicairus/hedebobepis/heroin dickus/kenobi virus

rating actual medieval names i have found as a medieval studies student but they get progressively more unhinged:

  • William de Appeltrefeld: 8/10 bc appeltrefeld sounds like a nice place to live. who wouldnt want to live in a field full of apple trees? points deducted cause there are like fifty bajillion williams in england
  • Luke de Luka, merchant of Luca: 6/10. ur parents really werent creative huh
  • Hugh de Wlonkeslowe: 7/10. looks like a straight person trying to keyboard smash. *laughs in english place names*
  • Roger Smert: 10/10 absolute banger of a name. does it make any sense? absolutely not! but you guys. i dont think you understand. smert!!
  • John de la Bro: 7/10. when ur such a bro that its literally ur name and 800 years in the future its all people know of u
  • Hugh Sad: 7/10. weve all been there buddy
  • Gaylarde de la Mote: 10/10. slay. i bet this guys mote was the gayest mote youve ever seen
  • Hugh de la Penne: 9/10. we stan a pasta man
  • Richard de Astlegh: 10/10. verily, he shall ne'er give thee up, ne'er let thee down, nor shall he run with great haste and desert thee, he shall ne'er cause thee to weep, ne'er bid you farewell, ne'er shall he speak wicked falshoods in thine ear or cause thee harm
  • Bindo Hug: 8/10. who is this man a hobbit???
  • Eudo la Zusche: 6/10. deadass sounds like something youd see in a really bad fantasy novel
  • William crisp: 7/10. w h a t.
  • Asser son of Licoriz: 7/10 there is so much going on here i dont even know what to tell you
  • Baldwin Panik: 10/10 cause this is a heckin mood
  • Richard Cok, aka Dick Cok: 69/10. nice.

is this orange or yellow.

its yellow you are all wrong i have decided just now

Image

hey op, what does this say?

nice try but i’m not colorblind it says 71

Avatar

Am I tripping?

Is that not 71?

Avatar

You’re slightly colorblind, that is 74 and the color of the car is orange.

world heritage post

It’s orange

it’s literally 71

Bestie it’s 74

Y’all it clearly fucking says 21

where are you getting that from?

Babes it’s 81 what r yall seeing

Avatar

its 74 bestie you might be colorblind

That 81 person can see shrimp colors

I took exactly the same image, increased the saturation, and shifted it to a part of the spectrum most people can see better.

For all your no-YOU-have-the-weird-color-vision argument-solving needs.

Also, the car is orange.

Anonymous asked:

What does the arab in your carrd mean? Is it like afab and amab?

.. i’m palestinian

Avatar

same energy

there’s more

Avatar

SIGH

Avatar

here’s another one

IT GETS WORSE WITH EVERY ADDITION

Avatar

how does this get even worse

I think about once in a while…

We have another one…

Avatar

This is the internet now tho 😭💀

Omg so many additions since I last saw this post! 😂😂😂

It’s funny but incredibly telling how entitled/ignorant/insensitive some of these people are… idk if it’s an education gap or purposeful ignorance.

The really bewildering thing to me is that I remember when you needed to get up and pull a dictionary off the shelf, or visit a library to look up the facts you needed. Now people have all kinds of information literally at their fingertips and they can’t be bothered to use it.

Avatar

Oh dear gods, it’s gotten worse

When you know politics but no facts

don’t take people too seriously on the internet

This hits different when combined with that “Americans don’t learn other countries exist till they’re in 5th Grade” post from the other day.

Avatar

Demily recently got another one lads

Also, I love that, in the sign language one, it seems like the last image might’ve been a gif of “fuck you,” screenshot at the perfect time to let you know they were about to sign “fuck you”

As a romanian person I gotta add this one too

This is my favourite post on this website

I have literally had people tell me that I’m a gross appropriator for learning sign language while not deaf.

I sometimes cannot speak, but leaving that aside, what the FUCK lol

I still remember the guy who got mad at me because I spoke about the cultural role of the Norse gods in my life and my culture and insisted that I should be “proud of my Christian heritage instead” and quite simply would not believe me when I told him I was from Scandinavia because “that doesn’t exist anymore.”

In a similar vein to Scandinavia not existing, I will never be able to forget this ask I received

what drugs were they on when they made this

Cab Calloway rotascoped!

Whoever thought of this was drinking absinthe

Thanks, Now I have nightmares

this was long before cartoons were ever thought of as ‘for kids’, the target audience of this one was roughly 20-40 betty boop cartoons featuring cab calloway singing, yes, but slang has changed so much you dont realize he was singing about opium, sugar daddies, death, weed, sex, booze, and gambling back when gambling was nearly as tabboo as sex and drugs. ‘minnie the moocher’ where cab calloway is a dancing walrus is specifically about someone who does literally everything on that list but die

most of the animation studios had their ‘thing’ to make their animation stand out, disney had fluid motion linked with quality music, warner brothers had top notch dialogue with carefully crafted facial expressions, MGM had comedic timing down to the individual frame that no live action comedian could dream of achieving, terrytoons had the budget of a ham sandwitch and a fistfull of nickels fleischer studios however had authentic jazz and heavy toned subject matter, often crossing the line of what we think of as ‘cartoon violence’ into realistic

idk why this is making me so emotional???

I love this. I’ve always had a love for cartoons

Cab Calloway, he was a legend performer and entertainer, although he’s listed as a jazz singer he did much more with his voice, his singing style and delivery was very unique. Cab (with his band) was the first black artist to sell over a million copies of a single record and he paved the way for many artists to come. Happy Black History Month.

sorry to make this long post longer, but I feel like it needed some actual photos of Cab Calloway, who is, in fact, the greatest

le mythe, la légende, j’ai nommé: pusheen, dictateur russe (fameux). 

i am amazed to see that despite being in my native language this retelling of the story behind me and my friends’ “famous russian dictator pusheen” private joke got popular

Avatar

Japanese child actress Mana Ashida (little Mako) was embarrassed that she couldn’t pronounce Guillermo Del Toro’s name so he gave her special permission to call him “Totoro-san” instead.

My Neighbor Guillermo Del Toro.

If I don’t reblog this, assume I’m dead.

Guillermo del Totoro

May I suggest doing an image search for Guillermo Del Totoro

Oh my??? God??

For the longest time in Disco Elysium, I couldn’t figure out why Empathy was the stat chosen to represent Moralism, the other political stats made more sense to me.

Rhetoric is Communism, constantly arguing for you and dismantling the arguments of others, choosing to feel smart and miserable over acknowledging your hopelessness under capital.

Endurance is Fascism, purely physical, purely reactionary. No intellectual angle and not the emotions of your mind, but of your gut. The squirming, uncomfortable feeling of your insides telling you that everything sucks in your life because of *them*.

Libertarianism is Savoir Faire, the slimy show off stat, the ooze and groove and grinding of a real hustler. The kind of mentality that leads a terminally poor cop to walk around the most destitute ghetto in the city bragging about his net worth and his visionary money manifesting, to which normal people rightfully treat you as if you’re insane.

All well and good, all tracks, but then there’s Moralism, the political center, the Kingdom of Conscience. The stat for this would seem plainly obvious, Volition, right? The self control stat, the stat of temperance and rationality and measured action. The boring stat. Hell, Volition is the one who chimes in approvingly when you try on the Moralist pants. It seems like a perfect fit, but no, the stat for Moralism is Empathy.

Empathy, the stat that lets you, even forces you to feel for others. To reach them at their level, cut through to the source of all their feelings, the Superego. What does any of that have to do with Moralism? With slow, incremental progress and La Responsabilité?

At first, I thought it might have been an oversight, one Psyche skill swapped with another. Then I thought maybe it was meant as a subtly pro-moralist statement, that extreme political ideologies make it harder to connect with others, and being more “sensible” politically makes you more relatable. But that doesn’t really gel with the games stance on centrism, which is decidedly not positive, with the Moralist International depicted as a cold and dehumanizing force of oppression.

It didn’t make sense until I completed the Moralist political vision quest, which is by far my favorite out of all four. With Harry on top of the statue of Frissel III, begging and pleading with Coalition Warship Archer, it’s an Empathy check you have to pass to make the faceless drone on the other side of the radio see you. Hear you, acknowledge you as a person who is suffering, acknowledge the suffering of Martinase and Revachol under the unfeeling negligence of the Moralintern.

That’s when it hit me, Empathy is the Moralist stat because it taps into a universal human experience. Most people don’t have consistent political beliefs, even those ascribing themselves to more radical points on the spectrum. Most people have a complicated relationship with faith. But that moment of Harry on the statue, shouting desperately at a dreary sky for someone to please do something about this, that moment is empathetic to us all.

Regardless of political leanings, whether secular or spiritual, that gnawing existential dread is consistent. The world keeps getting worse and worse, and nobody with any power seems to care, every day we’re met with the silence of God and the silence of Capital. That’s why Empathy was chosen to embody Moralism, to recognize that deep down we’ve all felt that anxious longing. To look up at the sky and hope that something, someone. Anything, anyone, would please just listen and hear. Please just do something about this.

If you're like me and want to make your Microsoft Word documents more *Disco* these are the fonts I used for my own personal lab notes.

1) Passion One (free alt to Dobra Black)

2) SinaNovaW01-Regular (I think the game uses medium, but again, workin' with what I got)

3) Core Sans R 25 (this one's not 100% but it's close enough for me. I'm putting it at the bottom of the pages)

Very obviously, I'm not a graphic designer or font expert... but this is getting me through writing these things lol

By far one of my favorite things about the way Disco Elysium handles politics is that Libertarianism is treated as an absolute joke. Like the game is obviously sympathetic towards communists, but there are elements of sympathy towards the moralists and fascists as well. Not sympathy in the sense of “oh can’t we all just get along, we’re all human” BS, but sympathy in the sense that you are able to understand a persons thought process that would lead them to embrace moralism or fascism. Even if that thought process is deeply flawed, and leads to horribly off kilter conclusions, going through the centrist and fash quests gives you meaningful insight into the appeal of those ideologies.

But Ultraliberalism? The game just laughs at you, repeatedly and mercilessly. As it should, you’re a cop so poor a guy you’ve known for one day has to pawn some fancy hubcaps so you can afford rent, yet all you talk about is your grindset. Your hustle, how you’re gonna disrupt the market and groove your way into the lap of luxury. It’s delusion, utter stark raving madness, and characters treat you as such.

Kim is at a loss for words whenever you crank on your libertarian spiel, Evrart calls you a retard, you have to *trick* the mega-rich light bending guy into giving you mercury mining stocks because he’s simply too perplexed by you. Joyce, last of the self identified Ultras, doesn’t take you seriously. Sileng just goes along with it the same way he goes along with any of the other nonsense you can spout, because he’s on his own hustle, and there is no loyalty among charlatans. The only character who is wholeheartedly onboard with the money engineering and the visionary wave making lifestyle is literally named IDIOT DOOM SPIRAL.

But you see, all these things are just incidental, where the game makes it most potent jab at libertarians is when the vision quest stops. Notice I said *stop* not *end*. The communist quest line ends with a Rhetoric check in order to ask The Most Important Question about Communism. The fascist quest has you look yourself in the eye with an Endurance check to see if you can stomach the truth about yourself and your Vöws. The moralist quest ends with a heart wrenching Empathy check as you beg the iron grey and soulless enforces of the status quo to please god help this district before war breaks out in the streets. There’s real personal stakes for Harry in all these disparate paths he can walk, what does Ultraliberalism get?

You and Kim look at a statue covered in tinsel and disco balls, Kim asks you why you went through with all this, and no matter what response you pick he’s like “Right, yeah, okay. Anyway, let’s finish the case.”

That’s it, no grand moment of pathos, no red Savoir Faire skill check to see if you really are the baddest hustler in the neoliberal hood after all. It’s completely limp, flaccid, lackluster. The game treats all the effort you put into this as exactly what it is: sad, cringe fantasies of a poor old man who’s huffing copium over the embarrassed millionaire mythos.

Disco Elysium doesn’t give libertarianism a poignant, profound conclusion because it’s an ideology undeserving of such treatment. It’s a hyper-capitalist cult mentality of toxic positivity and confirmation bias, a way for desperate people to trick themselves and other chumps into thinking they can bootstrap their way into wealth and prestige. It goes past wishful thinking into pure delirium, the game doesn’t engage with it seriously because it doesn’t have to, the only people who sincerely believe any of its tenants are morons and the clowns who sucker them.

Avatar

Time loop video games and why we love (or hate) them

Some essays about time loops in video games:

“Growth is a genuine change in you. Growth is seeing the world differently than you did before because you’re someone different now.”
Games highlighted: The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask, DEATHLOOP, Twelve Minutes, Oxenfree
“Part of why they’re regaining popularity is because the world is a mess and we either don’t know how or don’t have the power to fix it.”
Games highlighted: The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask, Elsinore, Outer Wilds, Undertale, Inscryption, The Stanley Parable, The Forgotten City, Twelve Minutes

“Time Loop Nihilism” by Jacob Geller (cw: graphic violence and incest)

“I eventually came to realize, if I’m going to do this all again, if there are few real consequences for failure… why would I play in a way that’s so boring?”
Games highlighted: DEATHLOOP, Dishonored, Hitman 3, Bloodborne, Twelve Minutes

“Clockwork Games and Time Loops” by Game Maker’s Toolkit

“Every decision you make matters because you’re always spending your most precious currency: time.”
Games highlighted: Outer Wilds, Dead Rising, The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask, The Sexy Brutale, Elsinore, Minit, Vision Soft Reset, Twelve Minutes, DEATHLOOP, Hitman 2, Deus Ex: Human Revolution
“Failure doesn’t feel like an inconvenience or a punishment, but is instead a natural and necessary part of the story.”
Games highlighted: Elsinore, The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask, Undertale, DEATHLOOP, Returnal

“The Problem with Time Loop Games | 12 Minutes Analysis” by Ozzy II (cw: graphic violence and incest)

“This is the point I was talking about earlier, where the first half of the game is just worthless.”
Games highlighted: The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask, Outer Wilds, Twelve Minutes, The Sexy Brutale
“When the sun began to glow and implode, I knew I had no choice but to put down whatever I was doing and accept what was about to happen.”
Games highlighted: Outer Wilds, Into the Breach, Minit, Twelve Minutes, DEATHLOOP, The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask
“Its black-and-white design and funny writing make this one memorable way longer than the minute it takes to complete a loop.”
Games highlighted: DEATHLOOP, Outer Wilds, The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask, Minit, Elsinore

If you're reading this...

go write three sentences on your current writing project.

Avatar

# my favourite part about this post # is that nowhere does it say to reblog this # but we’re all reblogging it # because if we have to suffer # so do other writers

Avatar

CONCEPTUALIZATION — The hanged man behind a hostel. A stoning. The red-headed child. This all seems familiar to you.

ENCYCLOPEDIA [Formidable: Success] — This setup is exactly like the opening scene of the film "Goncharov" directed by Martin Scorsese. It won several awards and is considered by many critics to be one of the best mafia cinescopes of all time.

YOU — This is just like Goncharov.

KIM KITSURAGI — Goncharov? What's that?

CUNO — This idiot hasn't seen Goncharov!

DRAMA — He doesn't even know what Goncharov *is*.

Disco Elysium political alignments based on historical graphic design styles!

Communist: Soviet Constructivist

Ultraliberal: Art Deco

Fascist: War Propaganda

Moralist: Swiss/International

there is a thing about photographers in the pacific northwest where they'll post a photo of some mossy trees and describe it with words like "primeval" or "primordial" or "old growth." and i, having grown up in a town that has an old sawmill that has been closed for longer than i have been alive, can look at those photos and see that each and every tree is one that i could put my arms around, even if my fingers wouldn't necessarily touch on the other side.

and there's just something about moss as the aesthetic bandage that covers over the sins of the pnw's colonial deforestation, the idea that people come in and take pictures and ooh and aah over the moss and sword ferns and tell themselves this is what Untouched Wilderness is/should look like, while a guy whose family got rich off that deforestation is presently the mayor of Oregon's biggest metropolitan area.

and i've said before (and will say again) that not all logging is bad, that there are times when it is even necessary (to control disease, to thin crowded stands) but the logging industry is one that came to be here and thrived here through vile means, and if you know what you're looking at there's not enough moss in the world to cover that up.

moss can't hide the photo of my great grandfather posing with his saw next to a felled tree with a diameter wider than he is tall. moss can't hide trees that are small enough that members of the crew that replanted them are probably still alive.

all the moss in those photos tells you is that for now, at least, it's still raining.