A misogynist and homophobe always has a seat at the Republican table.
#TheocratForHire #Disgusting
I love the implication that it's woke not because you can play a woman with a dick but because the woman's are larger.
They're just being true to the lore
The two year-old is now a solid two and a half. Just now, he was sitting on the couch playing with his pretend flip phone and he frowned and said “for gods sake. My battery is empty.”
The other day at breakfast I asked him if he was going to eat any more of his oatmeal and he said “no, I think I’m just gonna move on with my life.”
Today we were walking along and he asked me “How many Octobers is it today?” I told him it was the 21st.
He tried a bite of his hot soup at dinner and made a face and said “Mama, my soup is a little too temperature for me.”
Upon being served 1% milk for the first time, instead of his regular 2%: “is this water?”
Me: “no, it’s milk”
Kid: “but are you sure?”
Came up to me the other day, the middle of his pants totally soaked, and said “mama, I’m having a situation called ‘I peed in my pants.’”
I don’t think I even told you guys about the six months he spent saying “fuck” instead of “truck.”
angelwing430
I have to laugh at the folks in the notes claiming this is fake because “no 2-yr old is that advanced”. My guys, I work at a daycare almost exclusively with 2-3 year olds and let me tell you some of the wild shit I heard this last week alone,
“Uhhh, i ASSUME we’re going to the playground soon??” -2.5 year old girl
“[3 year old boy] pushed me because he doesn’t have a manners.” -2 yr old girl
“Did you spill your water?” “No no no no it’s not a concern” -2 yr old boy (while running away, dripping wet)
Kids are hilarious and smarter than you think
If you don’t have a lot of interactions with young children:
- Kids are smarter than you think
- Six months makes a really big difference when that is 1/5 of the total time you’ve been alive
All this, and also, they can tell you lots about their favorite things. My 2 year old nephew can tell you all about Star Wars (the 8 movies he’s seen at least) and loves going out of his way to bring up how Anakin was good and bad and good again when he died. Trust me, little kids learn and mimic and reenact all the things they get attached to. Also, he named his first fish Jengo Fett, and all following fish Boba Fett, so juries still out on how much he understands clones.
Kids pick up the language that’s used around and to them. Mannerisms too. They are tiny, efficient mimics and it will come out at the WEIRDEST times. Young kids will ABSOLUTELY say all the stuff listed here.
My cousin was somewhere between two and three, and I’d just arrived at her house, and she’s animatedly telling me a story of some kind, and I listen as I make my way through the house, get to the couch, and kick my shoes off. She stops dead in the middle of her sentence, puts her hands on her hips, levels me with a glare the likes of which I haven’t seen since, and goes, “WHAT are they doing there? Do you think the box at the front door is for DECORATION?”
Her mum, standing in the kitchen and watching all this, was GOBSMACKED. Apparently she said that exact phrase more often than she realised, and her kid had picked it up verbatim and started using it on unsuspecting guests (me).
(I got up and put my shoes in the box at the front door immediately)
My family’s lore includes the time my mother offhandedly said to Cousin’s son–who was maybe five–that Cousin’s wife certainly did have strong opinions about some minor thing, and the kid let out a sigh and said, in the driest and flattest and most world-weary tone you’ve ever heard, “Tell me about it.”
once i was helping with a class of 3 year olds and during drawing time one girl asked for a lion, specifically a lioness. i drew it and she just looked in silence so thinking she wanted a more liony lion i was like “do you want me to draw a boy lion next?” and she gives me this 🤨ass affronted look and says “umm she doesn’t NEED a man.”
Kids will do three things reliably:
- Repeat what they’ve heard, incorrectly and/or in the wrong context, to comic effect
- Repeat what they’ve heard in exactly the correct context, which is somehow even funnier
- Casually knock you on your ass with some offhand, but utterly profound, original statement
My five years old Niece has started going “Too bad, so sad.” And when called on it not being very nice goes “That’s what Mama always says.”
When my kid was about 2.5 I’d ask her to clean up her room or help me with chores and she’d say, “I don’t think that sounds like a good idea, mom.”
When Google voice said “what can I help you with?” And in a 5 year old’s voice of complete despair she whispered “Keeping. It. Together.”
When she was 6 we passed an accident on the road and upon seeing the cops standing behind the roadblock while EMTS helped someone on the floor she said, “Who even needs cops?”
The bright yellow Pokemon charging station works when you slip Pikachu’s ears off to reveal the prongs to slide into the wall socket. Then just simply plug your USB adapter into Pikachu’s butt and you are charging.
i always forget obama has a brother who really fucking hates him until he does stuff like this
i’m sorry but what was the alternative here, did you think Obama’s estranged older brother was reclaiming the f slur or something
despite what popular opinion may lead you to believe, some rocks actually do have scientifically-proven auras! Unfortunately, those rocks are uranium and the aura is cancer.
THIS^^^
And if you do get paid for your ideas/writing during the strike, that is considered scabbing and you will be barred from the WGA for life, as per this email from the Blacklist:
And, because a lot of people don't understand this bit, this is about you selling your ideas or writing to US-based TV studios or movie studios who are part of the AMPTP. There is no strike against book publishers. Nor audiobooks, graphic novels, or poetry publishing. Or just writing.
Read the above from the WGA.
i got these knockoff boots online and instead of the brand name on the tag they have the name of an apparently nonexistent martin scorsese movie??? what the fuck
How the fuck does his have less than 200k after setting the internet on fire for months
This lack of notes is probably a big part of why TikTok seems to think they invented the meme.
They think WHAT?!
really funny that every website is in an arms race to make itself as bad as possible and immediately someone makes a firefox extension to fix it
avg day on late Web 2.0
They just PUT A STICKER ON THE CLEARLY LABELLED USB PORT I'm dying
Ok but with how twitter and reddit are dying. What if tumblr actually takes off. What if the white house starts posting important things on tumblr. What if Joe biden announcement gets edited to cock monolog
What's kung pow penis?
*sighs*
K
When I was a kid, I regularly lost reading privileges for "having an attitude" and "acting out".
It wasn't as simple as being told not to read during other activities- one of the first times it happened, I remember being six years old, watching my stepfather pull fistfuls of books off my bookshelf and throw them to the floor in a heaping mess while I cried and asked him to stop.
It was weird. Every other adult I knew described me as exceptionally well-behaved, but at home, it was the opposite, and it was blamed on "learning bad habits from that shit you're reading".
Because I couldn't read at home, I spent all my free time at school in the library, reading with my friends.
When I grew up and moved away, I realized that my family life was toxic and abusive, and the "attitudes" I was being punished for were standing up for myself, standing up for my younger siblings, and resisting actual, real-life psychological abuse. Because I'd learned from what I'd read that my family wasn't normal, not like my parents said it was, and in my stories, the heroes were the people who spoke out when it was hard to.
It is insane to me that there are students right now who can't access books. It is insane that books are being outlawed. It is perverse that we are stealing away an entire generation's ability to contextualize their lives, to learn about the world around them, to develop critical thinking skills and express themselves and feel connected to the world or escape from it, whatever and whenever and however they need.
That is not how you raise a compassionate, thoughtful, powerful society.
That's how you process cattle.
It's fucking disgusting.
Were the "Moms for Liberty" prosecuted for theft?