the only hazel fan

it would've been funny if calypso came back and was made a chb counselor (not assigned to a cabin though) and then she is just a somewhat immortal teenager with a summer job. she hangs out for the free food and does a chore once or twice but 90% of the time she's taking the illegal hermes cabin route to the city and is just straight up messing around. chiron is like "do ur job pls im begging u" and calypso just continues playing cards with mr d

Calypso could takeover the camp, shes training to be the 2nd Mr D but she's even worse because she doesn't care at all, she'd carry a megaphone and go "😐 no running" and then she'd disappear with "sorry i have a meeting" and it turns out she was at a nymph rave and is passed out in the attic. She'd have an iphone and ppl would go "🫢 but isn't it u-unsafe???" And she'd go "yeah i guess" and then she'd post the interaction on Twitter. Any times Chiron tells her to do her job she calls up the party ponies to come over with a straight face

Ppl ask her about who was the great Percy Jackson and she just says "huh??? I don't know who that is?????" But if someone asks her about Leo she just assigns you 3 laps around the camp and starts her timer

Do they curse, a discussion post

Percy: yes but not too much, NEVER in front of his mom. Has gotten in trouble for it once or twice before. Never curses when angry

Annabeth: yes but only to call people stupid and when she's frustrated. She got in trouble for saying something bad and got put in the corner and the whole time she was muttering curses the athena cabin had only read in ancient texts

Jason: no at first but then he adds damn to his arsenal, and eventually a despondent "what the fuck." when he is really surprised but this is rare. the Romans know he had a very rich swearing vocab as a kid but he doesn't acknowledge it. Curses more around his besties

Piper: absolutely. it sounds natural and is natural. Not the worst, she just happens to say it at times that feels right

Leo: every other sentence. In the books he says shit like "that's bull" and "are u freaking kidding me." When will the uncensored version be released... On the other hand it is 93% funnier to consider that Leo just talks like that and censors himself. Says corny shit that makes u wish he cursed. It can go either way

Frank: only when (Leo) stresses him. His head is filled with ares + mars cursing a lot tho so he knows the most words. Actually he swears a LOT in his head just not outside. A few words can slip tho when he's really pissed

Hazel: yes all the time, she canonly gets in trouble for this. Favorite word is 'fucking bitchass'. That was two words but they are one when hazel says it

Nico: no

Reyna: she doesn't need to, u can feel it even if it's never said

Hedge: no EXCEPT for holy shit and hot damn specifically. he said fuck once and mellie lost her mind and begged him to say it again and he did, and she kept asking until chuck said fuck and while mellie finds it hilarious, hedge is embarrassed

Octavian: only says the slurs, doesn't discriminate who gets which one tho, they are all equal to him. that is his equality

thinking again about how in battle of the labyrinth percy’s like ‘i never want to think about annabeth going into the labyrinth ever again’ and then annabeth’s like ‘im going into the labyrinth. will you come with me’ and he’s like ‘ofc babe’

he’s like ‘annabeth is going to get us all killed for saying the sphinx is insulting her intelligence’ *100 pages later* ‘i love that about her’

one of the funniest parts of the solangelo book is nico straight boldly LYING when asked if he feels guilty about letting Octavian die. “i literally think about it every day😭” no you don’t king. we’ve been in your head and you dgaf. live your truth <3

tfw u become an auntie to ur brother’s 15+ demon children from his secret tartarus trip

the thought of apollo finding out abt the kids is making me fuck up my lungs

apollo pulls up in one of these on his babysitting days

shut the fuck up

let’s go demigods let’s go!

i know ppl bring this up all the time but camp jupiter’s military force being like all kids is just so fucking insane like how did that even get started… it’s not like real life rome did that and it’s not like there’s a shortage of adults like there is at chb either…… like “hello jason grace, age 3, i see you have learned a new word. we are going to brand you and give you a sword now.” their military leader is a 15 year old girl who’s stressed out of her mind. they have 8th graders walking around in full armor and going on quests. there’s a city of full grown adults 400 meters down the road. like i get that they gotta be on the level of the greek characters who actually are all child soldiers but it would’ve been so funny if camp jupiter was a little more sensible about it… the possibility of the roman characters being 30-year-old roman soldiers stuck hanging out with greek teenagers is just so so fun to me

actually wait. here are some possibilities for the roman members of the 7:

the pjo musical said hey for the scene where luke reveals himself as the lightning thief he’s gonna start singing a reprise of percy’s song that reflects how he is essentially a corrupted version of percy, that he too was once an innocent and scared kid but became overridden by grief and rage and hatred to the point of no return :) enjoy

& i go insane in my bedroom about it regularly

Cringefail loser idiot

"beckendorf was percy's bisexual awakening" i say into the mic. the crowd boos. i head to the stairs, ready to walk out in shame, until i heard a voice shouting from the public.

"she's right!" says among the crowd percy jackson himself.

i think something very important that people kinda forget is like. there is never any mention of percy actually Liking nico. there’s never affection just obligation and guilt. nico is a kid he just wishes he could stop worrying about. they ARE besties tho do not get this twisted sometimes a pair of besties is two people unwillingly handcuffed together by fate desperately trying (and failing) to make their situation better

jasob

We don’t need a fucking tv show ur going to sit down and watch the poker face lady Gaga scene and ur gonna like it!!