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new blog, spooky edition

@hauntoblogical / hauntoblogical.tumblr.com

pronoun surprise / 20s / obscurity enjoyer
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mycroftrh

Far worse, in my opinion, than the famous “he wouldn’t fucking say that” is “he WOULD fucking say that, as part of his facade, but you seem to think he would mean it genuinely”

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as newspapers today dont tend to hire children, a modern day Tintin would run a clickbait YouTube channel, except the clickbait is 100% real every single time

he starts off as an irritating conservative pundit at 14, meets Chang then leaves the think tank paying him and launches his own independent channel and blows up shortly after. Chang helps with video editing and managing his socials and they often chat on video calls between adventures. Haddock, his foster dad, has absolutely no knowledge of his earlier videos.

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brockdavis

Recently, while staring far too long at a potato chip, it occurred to me that the ridges could possibly be used to create a lenticular effect. So I got out some chip dip (and the smallest paint brush I have) to test it out. I started with a simple 2-frame illustration of a football and a basketball, then I painted a little sour cream and onion dip bird. 🥔🕊️ - via my new @brockdavisart instagram

ruffles have *looks at smudged writing on hand* rotoscoping?

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reblogged

last night my partner held a somber little passover seder to show me what it’s about and when they got to the part where they were supposed to open the door for elijah they paused, frowned, and said “oh. huh. there is a clown.” and I looked out. and sure enough. there was a clown.

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draconym
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gender-trash
Anonymous asked:

I would be very interested in hearing the museum design rant

by popular demand: Guy That Took One (1) Museum Studies Class Focused On Science Museums Rants About Art Museums. thank u for coming please have a seat

so. background. the concept of the "science museum" grew out of 1) the wunderkammer (cabinet of curiosities), also known as "hey check out all this weird cool shit i have", and 2) academic collections of natural history specimens (usually taxidermied) -- pre-photography these were super important for biological research (see also). early science museums usually grew out of university collections or bequests of some guy's Weird Shit Collection or both, and were focused on utility to researchers rather than educational value to the layperson (picture a room just, full of taxidermy birds with little labels on them and not a lot of curation outside that). eventually i guess they figured they could make more on admission by aiming for a mass audience? or maybe it was the cultural influence of all the world's fairs and shit (many of which also caused science museums to exist), which were aimed at a mass audience. or maybe it was because the research function became much more divorced from the museum function over time. i dunno. ANYWAY, science and technology museums nowadays have basically zero research function; the exhibits are designed more or less solely for educating the layperson (and very frequently the layperson is assumed to be a child, which does honestly irritate me, as an adult who likes to go to science museums). the collections are still there in case someone does need some DNA from one of the preserved bird skins, but items from the collections that are exhibited typically exist in service of the exhibit's conceptual message, rather than the other way around.

meanwhile at art museums they kind of haven't moved on from the "here is my pile of weird shit" paradigm, except it's "here is my pile of Fine Art". as far as i can tell, the thing that curators (and donors!) care about above all is The Collection. what artists are represented in The Collection? rich fucks derive personal prestige from donating their shit to The Collection. in big art museums usually something like 3-5% of the collection is ever on exhibit -- and sometimes they rotate stuff from the vault in and out, but let's be real, only a fraction of an art museum's square footage is temporary exhibits. they're not going to take the scream off display when it's like the only reason anyone who's not a giant nerd ever visits the norwegian national museum of art. most of the stuff in the vault just sits in the vault forever. like -- art museum curators, my dudes, do you think the general public gives a SINGLE FUCK what's in The Collection that isn't on display? no!! but i guarantee you it will never occur, ever, to an art museum curator that they could print-to-scale high-res images of artworks that are NOT in The Collection in order to contextualize the art in an exhibit, because items that are not in The Collection functionally do not exist to them. (and of course there's the deaccessioning discourse -- tumblr collectively has some level of awareness that repatriation is A Whole Kettle of Worms but even just garden-variety selling off parts of The Collection is a huge hairy fucking deal. check out deaccessioning and its discontents; it's a banger read if you're into This Kind Of Thing.)

with the contents of The Collection foregrounded like this, what you wind up with is art museum exhibits where the exhibit's message is kind of downstream of what shit you've got in the collection. often the message is just "here is some art from [century] [location]", or, if someone felt like doing a little exhibit design one fine morning, "here is some art from [century] [location] which is interesting for [reason]". the displays are SOOOOO bad by science museum standards -- if you're lucky you get a little explanatory placard in tiny font relating the art to an art movement or to its historical context or to the artist's career. if you're unlucky you get artist name, date, and medium. fucker most of the people who visit your museum know Jack Shit about art history why are you doing them dirty like this

(if you don't get it you're just not Cultured enough. fuck you, we're the art museum!)

i think i've talked about this before on this blog but the best-exhibited art exhibit i've ever been to was actually at the boston museum of science, in this traveling leonardo da vinci exhibit where they'd done a bunch of historical reconstructions of inventions out of his notebooks, and that was the main Thing, but also they had a whole little exhibit devoted to the mona lisa. obviously they didn't even have the real fucking mona lisa, but they went into a lot of detail on like -- here's some X-ray and UV photos of it, and here's how art experts interpret them. here's a (photo of a) contemporary study of the finished painting, which we've cleaned the yellowed varnish off of, so you can see what the colors looked like before the varnish yellowed. here's why we can't clean the varnish off the actual painting (da vinci used multiple varnish layers and thinned paints to translucency with varnish to create the illusion of depth, which means we now can't remove the yellowed varnish without stripping paint).

even if you don't go into that level of depth about every painting (and how could you? there absolutely wouldn't be space), you could at least talk a little about, like, pigment availability -- pigment availability is an INCREDIBLY useful lens for looking at historical paintings and, unbelievably, never once have i seen an art museum exhibit discuss it (and i've been to a lot of art museums). you know how medieval european religious paintings often have funky skin tones? THEY HADN'T INVENTED CADMIUM PIGMENTS YET. for red pigments you had like... red ochre (a muted earth-based pigment, like all ochres and umbers), vermilion (ESPENSIVE), alizarin crimson (aka madder -- this is one of my favorite reds, but it's cool-toned and NOT good for mixing most skintones), carmine/cochineal (ALSO ESPENSIVE, and purple-ish so you wouldn't want to use it for skintones anyway), red lead/minium (cheaper than vermilion), indian red/various other iron oxide reds, and apparently fucking realgar? sure. whatever. what the hell was i talking about.

oh yeah -- anyway, i'd kill for an art exhibit that's just, like, one or two oil paintings from each century for six centuries, with sample palettes of the pigments they used. but no! if an art museum curator has to put in any level of effort beyond writing up a little placard and maybe a room-level text block, they'll literally keel over and die. dude, every piece of art was made in a material context for a social purpose! it's completely deranged to divorce it from its material context and only mention the social purpose insofar as it matters to art history the field. for god's sake half the time the placard doesn't even tell you if the thing was a commission or not. there's a lot to be said about edo period woodblock prints and mass culture driven by the growing merchant class! the met has a fuckton of edo period prints; they could get a hell of an exhibit out of that!

or, tying back to an earlier thread -- the detroit institute of arts has got a solid like eight picasso paintings. when i went, they were kind of just... hanging out in a room. fuck it, let's make this an exhibit! picasso's an artist who pretty famously had Periods, right? why don't you group the paintings by period, and if you've only got one or two (or even zero!) from a particular period, pad it out with some decent life-size prints so i can compare them and get a better sense for the overarching similarities? and then arrange them all in a timeline, with little summaries of what each Period was ~about~? that'd teach me a hell of a lot more about picasso -- but you'd have to admit you don't have Every Cool Painting Ever in The Collection, which is illegalé.

also thinking about the mit museum temporary exhibit i saw briefly (sorry, i was only there for like 10 minutes because i arrived early for a meeting and didn't get a chance to go through it super thoroughly) of a bunch of ship technical drawings from the Hart nautical collection. if you handed this shit to an art museum curator they'd just stick it on the wall and tell you to stand around and look at it until you Understood. so anyway the mit museum had this enormous room-sized diorama of various hull shapes and how they sat in the water and their benefits and drawbacks, placed below the relevant technical drawings.

tbh i think the main problem is that art museum people and science museum people are completely different sets of people, trained in completely different curatorial traditions. it would not occur to an art museum curator to do anything like this because they're probably from the ~art world~ -- maybe they have experience working at an art gallery, or working as an art buyer for a rich collector, neither of which is in any way pedagogical. nobody thinks an exhibit of historical clothing should work like a clothing store but it's fine when it's art, i guess?

also the experience of going to an art museum is pretty user-hostile, i have to say. there's never enough benches, and if you want a backrest, fuck you. fuck you if going up stairs is painful; use our shitty elevator in the corner that we begrudgingly have for wheelchair accessibility, if you can find it. fuck you if you can't see very well, and need to be closer to the art. fuck you if you need to hydrate or eat food regularly; go to our stupid little overpriced cafeteria, and fuck you if we don't actually sell any food you can eat. (obviously you don't want someone accidentally spilling a smoothie on the art, but there's no reason you couldn't provide little Safe For Eating Rooms where people could just duck in and monch a protein bar, except that then you couldn't sell them a $30 salad at the cafe.) fuck you if you're overwhelmed by noise in echoing rooms with hard surfaces and a lot of people in them. fuck you if you are TOO SHORT and so our overhead illumination generates BRIGHT REFLECTIONS ON THE SHINY VARNISH. we're the art museum! we don't give a shit!!!

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One of my favorite museums is a natural history museum with a shit ton of taxidermy. It's an OLD museum. grown out of the teaching specimens era, so the building is very much not designed to have the kind of display space modern science museums do. They have educational displays where possible but a substantial chunk of the place is still just Wall of Fish. Wall of Birds. etc. Which are great IMO but absolutely impossible to give context for every animal there.

But all the specimens are carefully organized by taxonomy, natural habitat, common characteristics! No space wasted, maximum exhibit density! You're invited to admire individual species, but you're also very clearly presented larger taxonomic groups to better see patterns across species.

Meanwhile I find art museums extremely hit or miss because, almost always, you are expected to focus on a single piece of art at a time. It's minimalist. One artwork, one placard, a buffer zone of tastefully blank wall. Like OP says, there isn't enough context! Exhibits have themes or artistic movements or time periods but how often do they draw more detailed connections between each piece? At absolute most there's a couple paragraphs per piece, and so often that says nothing I as a layperson care about. Without a rich context, I simply do not care about anything that's not visually interesting, especially especially especially galleries full of portraits or landscapes or anything remotely realistic.

Semirecently I went to an exhibit of fantasy artwork throughout history. Mostly Western, spanning a few centuries, ranged from masterpiece paintings to children's book covers and MtG card art. Many visually striking pieces, detailed placards for most of them. I had a great time! But thinking back, even in this less-snooty, high-effort-curation exhibit… surprisingly few of the pieces had real explanations. Don't know what MtG or DnD sourcebooks are? Too bad, this means nothing to you. Many of the paintings referenced specific fables; I get why the museum isn't bothering to explain Rapunzel or Beauty and the Beast, but I'm quite well read and still wasn't familiar with them all! Naming the source material doesn't help if your audience doesn't have the necessary expertise.

Like. I don't expect art museums to present a complete historical, material, and social context for every single item they put on display. But when designing exhibits, they could at least choose some of that to tie the works together, beyond "these are all items we happen to own".

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chotomy

ok but helen and odysseus have SO much potential as a brotp. his lying/disguise skills + her vocal impression abilities? the chaos would be UNSTOPPABLE

concept: the scene in little iliad where odysseus sneaks into troy to find the palladium and helen recognizes him, but it’s shot exactly like the window reunion scene from doctor who

the little iliad is a lost epic so i’m just going to assume this is what happened :)

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I’ve never been a real star wars fan but the phantom menace came out when I was 6 and my older brother was 8 so we were absolutely among the target audience and we had toy light sabers & we spent a lot of time playing star wars but my brothers were anakin and obi wan etc. and my best friend was padmé which meant i had to come up with a star wars oc and since my brother was anakin i decided okay. i would be anakin’s sister.

i made up a backstory that i was his twin sister who also lived on tatooine and i also had latent force potential but qui gon and obi wan didn’t even try to meet me even when anakin mentioned me and they left me behind.

this was an utter betrayal to me obviously, like my brother got rescued and i got abandoned and i could have been him and i should have been him. i should’ve been at his side. i should have gotten training and all else. i should have been a jedi too.

but they didn’t even care to meet me. so i had this intense grudge against the jedi and i ended up developing my skills myself and then i grew up and got myself off tattooine and set out on a mission as a rogue force user to kill obi wan.

and 6 year old me really embodied that role. she felt that. so when I was like 25 & rewatched the original star wars trilogy for the first time since childhood, when obi wan came on I was like ugh. I hate that guy. and my friend was like “WHY?”

and I thought about it and realized it wasn’t actually his character. I was remembering my childhood self insert oc beef.

Like, sorry you wouldn’t get it but obi wan and I have history.

best part of the games was the reveal that anakin turned out evil because I was like. you idiots. I wouldn’t have turned out evil. you took the wrong twin. but i’m evil now. congratulations now you have two evil siblings. stupid ass.

this character is objectively hilarious in retrospect because she would have shown up in some climactic moment to kill a jedi while knowing absolutely nothing about the politics at play and the rise of the empire and the sith but it would be assumed she WAS a sith and she’d be like ???? what are you talking about? i’m here to kill one guy. whatever you freaks have going on leave me out of it.

me showing up at the end of Revenge of the Sith like

yes she hated anakin on the assumption he had a chance in his late teenagehood to come back for her and he didn’t. she also hated him for becoming evil for no reason and wasting his potential. she was really there to burn it all down. she usually died in our games to preserve canon bc obviously anakin couldn’t die before becoming darth vadar & obi wan couldn’t die before meeting luke

but now I like to think perhaps someone could save her….I think she should end up in a Zuko & Uncle Iroh situation in Yoda’s swamp.