Did someone say COMPLETE DATA ANALYSIS OF ALL THE DEATHS IN THE LIFE SERIES? No? Well. I did it. Here are some neat graphs for you guys to look at so that you don’t have to deal with the gigantic spreadsheet I did!
Let’s start off with the big bad question: what gets people killed in this game, anyway?
Note that a CAUSE OF DEATH is not the same as a KILL. Cause of death is what pops up in the chat when someone dies (ex. PearlescentMoon was slain by Smallishbeans, BdoubleO100 fell from a high place). The cause of death does not always account for player responsibility (ex. TNT traps). Generally, a player is only considered to be someone’s cause of death if the death occurs through direct PvP combat. HOWEVER, responsibility for an indirect kill such as a trap still goes toward a player’s total kill count—for example, Joel has 14 kills overall, 10 of which are direct enough for him to be considered the actual cause of death. After all, axes don’t kill people without being swung by someone.
A few other whacky things about kill counts:
- Self-inflicted deaths do not count toward a player’s kill count (ex. Grian doesn’t get a kill for jumping off Monopoly Mountain at the end of 3rd Life, Scott doesn’t get a kill for blowing himself up at the end of Double Life).
- When it comes to Double Life, soulmates are considered to share their three lives. No distinction is made between Soulmate A's life and Soulmate B's life, and each death only counts as one kill (ex. Joel gets one kill for killing Scott with fireworks, even though that also killed Pearl (however, Pearl’s cause of death is still Joel, as her life is considered the same as Scott’s)).
- Using the /kill command does not count toward your kill count. Grian.
With that cleared up, let’s look at kill counts.
Actual dsmp lore bits that I don’t think we talk about much
- Sally was never retconned, it’s been two years and STILL it is canon that c!Wilbur fucked a fish and somehow Fundy was born
- c!Sapnap is c!BBH’s son
- c!Dream has a hidden bunker under c!Tommy’s old hillside base (which is honestly creepy as fuck–)
- It is also apparently canon that c!Wilbur reproduces asexually and birthed c!Fundy from his toe (don’t ask–)
- c!Tommy just wanted the Egg to tell c!BBH to swear
- c!Tommy made his own therapy business once and I don’t remember how it went tbh but I’m guessing not well
- c!Fundy is canonically trans (although that might’ve been retconned idk– I hope not though–) (update: yes it was retconned)
- cc!Purpled was late to the L'Manburg duel stream because he was out eating a burrito and everyone started streaming “War!” but traffic caused him and his (brother? sibling? Idk whoever drove Purpled to the burrito place) to get home late
- people in cc!Jack’s chat called him Jack L'Manifold in his first dsmp or first L'manburg stream which is an epic pun
- mexican dream’s ghost is just in a cursed class by himself. I remember watching that stream after a driver’s ed zoom meeting at my aunt’s house and being like “what the fuck what is going on”
- c!Puffy sued c!Jack for hotel ownership (Puffy being on Tommy’s side, but of course now the hotel got fUCKING BLOWN UP– WHY MUST EVERYTHING ON THIS SERVER GET BLOWN UP HHHH)
– c!Sapnap was addicted to blaze powder and was actually one of the drug van’s best customers
- DreamXD is a huge c!George simp
[I removed the bit about warrior cats b/c tbh I’m not even sure anymore if that’s true I can’t find where I originally read it. Also I can’t think of anything to replace it in the masterpost so you now get this blurb. ;-;]
Phil: “This place sucks. This place sucks. I hate Antarctica so much. It’s so shit. Nothing can spawn here, dude. Fuck, It’s just a death- death zone.
Also Phil: “But it’s home 🥺”
Bonus from Techno: “It’s terrible but it’s home. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!”
Source: Taking over the world
okay SO we're talking dsmp as a play and I have literally been thinking about this for the best part of two years here's a thing. characters breaking the 4th wall, there are only four (during s1):
1. Dream. puppeteer-style popping in and out to change the story/make it more exciting for the audience because he's in control, he's the one who brought them here, say. doesn't directly interact with them but acknowledges them, a nod here, a wink there.
2. Techno. outright asides in the middle of dialogues scenes, never looks to the audience on the punchline but you know it's a joke for them. LOTS of soliloquies - his speech in the bunker post-manberg festival where he talks about the rocket launcher springs to mind.
3. Tommy. isn't actually aware there's an audience, mostly doing it for the bit (picked it up from Wilbur + Techno), but makes a disproportionate amount of 4th wall breaking jokes.
4. Wilbur. at the beginning of the play he is completely unaware of the audience, but as he starts to spiral he begins to see them more and more, performing to them in a way that makes sense to us but seems unnatural to the other characters. the whole 'chekhov's gun' thing is him aware that we are waiting for that outcome, in button rooms scenes he's constantly looking back for our approval. (also during his spiral you'd start to hear train sounds in his worse scenes but that's part of another post.)
anyway it is so cool we're talking about this I finally get to share my nerdery
the hypixel tweet didn't do a great job of showing off techno's statue, so here's some pictures of it without the dramatic lighting/angle so that you can see more of the details
roses and potatoes have been left at his feet. he's wearing his crown and a black cape. he's holding an enchanted diamond sword. a purple bow/ribbon sits at the bottom of the statue. all of the statue is made of stone and is grey
sapnap forgot there was a 4th lap again im sobbing he’s so dumb and that’s how he lost 1st place
Announcement of the 67th annual Minecraft Championship
i dont think i’d like to perceive this fact
I just think it's hilarious
And the guy who most sounds like he's like 16 is the oldest of them lmao