Anonymous asked:
You won't believe your eyes,
Ten thousand naked guys
that means… twenty thousand cocks…
I made a miscalculation.
myfinalmessagefatdudesequalshot
that is the most beautiful airfryer i have ever seen
myfinalmessagefatdudesequalshot
found it! bruno smart air fryer in mint green BZK-KZ02TW-GR
Theirs a horse in the pingles
Yeah you're right. It WOULD be pretty fucked up if you were a swan but you were raised by ducks and you grew up never seeing another swan or even knowing that such a thing as a swan even existed so you just thought you were a duck with something super wrong with it.
Ha I wonder how many strokes the most complex Chinese character has like maybe eightee-
Has a Chinese son, names him bèng-dá, and he hates me
My beloved son 䨻龘 just trying to write his name in kindergarten
You wouldn’t understand
is now a good time to mention that the woman in the screenshot literally runs rotatingsandwiches.com
the lonesome boner seems to shoot a load at night
im not reblogging this shit man.
you literally just did dumbass
Ripley's just fuck off and get out of here
Ripley's I'm tired of explaining this shit to you
Ripley's you know what? Whatever.
sorry. what the fuck was that?
he gaggy on my rogers until I whoopsy-doo
whispering "fentanyl" under my breath as the cops arrest me, causing them to fly back like a skyrim shout
Give this a normal caption challenge
me (lactose intolerant) about to ruin my whole day
my stomach in kindergarten after eating an entire bottle of elmer’s glue
Hitting the Häagen-Dazs® white chocolate truffle after a shitty day at work
obsessed with the way my robotics team lead talks
she’s reinventing hieroglyphics
She’s the only person who truly understands how emojis were meant to be used.
best part abt aa3 so far is that whenever mia is in a tough spot she just says some actual lawyer shit like this whereas phoenix is always like "uhhhhhh judge im just a silly little guyyy please stick with me pretty pleaseeee its my birthday"
also shes a hater.
And look where it got her. Dead.
I wanna see a ufo
Look at a flying object and simply choose not to identify it
i need people to know that warlock girl went on to win that season of America’s Next Top Model by like a significant margin