Seraph/Theo

bro just called me strawberry tart and i'm so . sobs I AM ADORED!

ive gotta private this shit i just learned you can do that

im just so tired yk? its rlly a battle to stay awake and to put any effort into shit

yk when you sense youre going to cry but you dont rlly know why

but then you figure it out later while youre crying understanding nad facing that feeling

thought i was getting better but i feel like i'm going to get worse :(

bro lit got me kickin my feet n shit gay as hell eeewww <333 lovr them

its so awkward having this like shag/scene hair cut idk what to describe it as rn but its so hard to style for work when serving food i be out here lookin like the walmart link

only thing funny about me is my users everything else is mildly concerning

i hate them so much i dont want anything to do with them i hate them i hate them i hate them so much i wish they would just disappear go away

i cant breathe cant breathe cant breathe cant breathe cant breathe

i feel so nauseous wanna die wanna die wanna die wanna die feels like they just say things to keep me from getting rid of them feels like their just lying to me the way they act doesnt match up with anything they say im so sick im going to throw up im going to throw up im going to throw up i dont wanna be here anymore i dont wanna i dont wanna i dont wanna dont wanna dont wanna dont wanna

this isnt funny im going to kms

if i lose my memory and i need to be reminded who they are i hope this is the first thing i am shown as it would really give me my memories back immediately with it

i need an attachment a fixation

i've practiced all my expressions

gripping onto the bathroom sink's counter, leaning forward

my mouth in a line

my eyes half lidded as they scrutinized every detail

i needed to be pretty

cus'

i couldnt stand that look of disgust

cant stand it

dont look at me like that

i didnt want to be something disgusting

i wanted to be looked at with love, care, to be seen. I wanted people to look at me.

had the craziest breakdown last night it was so sudden too i think i cried for like 4 hours straight i felt so deranged actually went insane

unforunate i gotta be the breadwinner sob

why does college have 2 be so stressful man im going to be stuck as a student for years im not even in a state where i can see myself as me and i have to figure out what i wanna do?? wtf

i get a little upset how my parents and siblings didn't show up to my graduation or even congratulate me which yk I didnt want a big party just something small

but then my little brothers comes up and their making sure everyone is going and stuff and its like I never even graduated i have no accomplishments that their willing to recognize