Growing up

take me to the lakes

where all the poets went to die

i don't belong and my beloved neither do you

those windermere peaks

look like a perfect place to cry

i’m setting off, but not without my muse

t.s. - the lakes.

you know the feeling when you come across a piece of media and you find so much of yourself in it and you're like wow no other book or music could possibly understand me as much as this one does and there's this bittersweet feeling of being understood so well but you know nothing else will get you the way this does?

satellite is so tender because essentially what satellites do is they orbit around bigger objects and the relationship between the object and the satellite is that of a give and take. the satellite sends signals to the object and the object keeps the satellite connected. the lyric 'spinning, i'm waiting for you, to pull me in' basically says 'hey. i know you're going through things but i'm here if you want to talk. i'm just waiting you to let me in.' which reminds me so much of 'but i can't get inside, when you're lost in your pride' because in that, it's 'i wanna be there but you won't let me in'. the harry defenceless was written about matured and is now opening up through satellite. it's about working through the communication issues and saying i love you and i will fight for the both of us. the lyric 'i'm in an la mood i don't want to talk to you' speaks volumes about how harry said that la is work and england is home and how he's learnt to compartmentalise work and his private life. he's saying that yes, my work life is currently shot to hell but i don't want to talk about it right now. i just want to be there with you and be there for you. when you look at habit and the lyric 'you gave me the time and space, i was out of control' and then listen to satellite, it's the same thing. it's about giving each other the time and space to sort things out on their own basis and recalibrating it all. but it's also saying, 'i'm here. you can talk to me whenever you want. and even if you don't want to talk, i'll share this silence with you.' the song starts out slowly and then builds up to this beautiful, stunning climax of shouts and drums and it can be easily read as frustration. in a way it is, it is frustration stemming from the fact that 'i want to give you space but i also can't bear the thought of you going through all of this alone and i wish i could help but i know you will come to me in your time. you will pull me in. i'm right here.' i think it's a very healthy representation of how long term relationships work because it's talking about individuality and how sometimes when your partner is going through something all you can do is just be there for them. it's treating each of you as your own person and respecting each other. it also bears remembering that the moon is a natural satellite and it feeds off of the sun's light and we all know who's the moon and the sun.

Growing up is actually all about realizing people don’t inherently dislike you and it’s a bit odd to assume they do

Last Week Tonight, March 16, 2022

soulmates

emily brontë, wuthering heights // nfwmb, hozier // madeline miller, the song of achilles // rumi // louis tomlinson, habit // plato, the symposium // sarah perry, the essex serpent // sleeping at last, turning page // leo tolstoy, anna karenina // percy shelley, prometheus unbound

Every leaf speaks bliss to me

Fluttering from the autumn tree.

-Emily Brontë

— Anaïs Nin.

"𝐰𝐞 𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐛𝐞 𝐤𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐫𝐬,

𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬.

𝐰𝐞 𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐛𝐞 𝐤𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐫𝐬,

𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐭 𝐥𝐞𝐟𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐫𝐮𝐧?"

-- 𝘸𝘦 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘬𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘳𝘴, 𝘮𝘪𝘬𝘬𝘺 𝘦𝘬𝘬𝘰

date someone who makes you feel like concerts do

October is my empire. Terror is part of me. 一 Tamura Ryūichi