I had a nightmare that Doug Walker rebranded as the Nintendo Pervert and I had to review his new content on youtube or I would get fired from my job but it was so explicit that I got banned on youtube and cancelled on twitter.

29 pictures of Gilbert Gottfried that’ll make you wish trees had legs

in the war grounds, in the troubled waters, i stay fresh as shit for my bitches always

in the war grounds, in the troubled waters, i stay fresh as shit for my bitches always

“you just need to accept that” is probably one of the funniest thing I’ve seen in a tutorial 

not going to lie to you they are charging to muuch for all this crap at the store

SILENT HILL 3 (2003)

As always, the Irish speak nothing but facts.

How many more innocent civilians have to be killed by Israel before you condemn that for it?

That is a genocide.

That this is a crime on all accounts.

And deserves to be punished to the full extent off the law.

Now I lay me down to sleep

I pray The Lord my soul to keep

If I should die before I wake

I pray The Lord my soul to take

they have played us for absolute fools

you used to call me on my hands-free talking glove

I’m just wondering how they can possibly market this as hands-free

In ancient times, people needed to get high on hallucinogenic grasses just to jerk off to a single animal crossing character. But now there's enough microplastics in our food that the average guy is basically a Greek oracle.

employees should be allowed to steal, actually

idk. yesterday was a slow day and at the end of it, I still stared into a cash drawer, one of three, that had more than my rent in it, even if you only count the 20s. I spent a lot of that day trying to calculate in my head how many hours of work equal one pair of pants, let alone how many hours of work equals the fun thing I want to do next month.

I feel a cough coming on, because I work in a drug store, and all of my customers are sick. I always feel a little bit sick, now. I can't afford to eat well enough to keep my body healthy. Cough medicine is worth two hours and 20 minutes of work. Our store probably bought a case of cough medicine for they price we're selling one box. If this cough gets worse, I might have to call out, which will cost me more than the medicine in the long run- but that doesn't give me the money to buy the medicine right now. I stock a case onto the shelf. I don't buy any.

A mom wrangling three crying, sick kids enters my line and sets two types of children's medicine down, says they're both on sale and thank god for that. I ring her up, and she gets very quiet, because she misread the sign, and her total is twice as high as she was expecting. Her youngest screams in the cart, because she's burning up with fever. Her mother very quietly asks, please, she's so sorry, if I could please take the more expensive one off her total.

I agree, I move the box below the counter, and when she's not looking, I slip it into her bag. I pray as hard as I can that if she notices the "mistake" she says nothing, because I so desperately want her to have that medicine. The store has lost profit at the cost of a child's health. I don't bat an eye. This is a terminable offense. If I'm presented with the same situation tonight, I'll do it in a heartbeat.

The myth of evil employees stealing from the company falls apart the second you realize the company would shoot you dead to make a profit. This isn't two equal players, one of whom is stealing from the other. This is someone fighting for survival versus someone fighting to make an extra million. It's not equal.

Employees should be able to steal, actually.

Bro I teared up oh my god bro

When I worked at Walmart as a cashier almost 20yrs ago. A guy came in with his obviously sick 5yr old son. & all he was buying was a bottle of medicine for his kid. He was short a dime. A fucking dime. 10 cents. I had a dime & pulled it out of my pocket & helped pay for the medicine.

My manager comes over in a huff & angrily says, "What were you thinking?! How could you do that?! What if he expects you to cover him every single time he's short on money??? He could be a meth addict or something."

Me, "I'm not going to lose any sleep over helping & being out a dime. I would do it again."

This guy comes in a day or two later, holding a dollar in the air & running towards me. He gives me the dollar & says for me to keep it. He wasn't there for anything else, just came in to give the dollar.

When it came time for me to quit. It was still during the time a cashier didn't need an override to discount items. I had HAAAADDD it with Walmart's bullshit. & so EVVVVERYYYYONE got discounts over the course of a week.

A woman comes in with a couple thousands dollars worth of stuff to redecorate her house. She probably paid $300.

Moms with a basketful of groceries. 75% off.

I even told my husband (they didn't know he was my husband) to come in when he got paid & to get as many groceries & hygiene & cleaning products as he could fit in a basket. & whatever else he wanted. & I discounted TF out of it.

I didn't care anymore & I wanted to save everybody in my checkout money.

& to this day, working the odd jobs in retail - I internally snicker at loss prevention. Fuck that. You want to steal something? Babes, I didn't see shit.

Halloween artwork of Waluigi, posted by Fumihide Aoki, the original creator of Waluigi, on his Instagram account. The artwork references the popular Japanese Lupin the Third franchise.

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Our son got number 1 on this list so we're washing him

To think that we will never know the identity of this mystery tweeter, thanks to the meticulous censorship of their url