local cat has never been pet or held or loved or cherished in entire life, says local cat

local cat forced to sleep on shins due to cruel and inhumane laptop placement policy, more at 11

“he’s my comfort character!” then comfort him, he’s drowning in an indescribable emptiness right about now

no.... he's not done marinating. /reaches for the angst/

Oblivion is such a good game

pressed against the heating vent with TWO big pillows

Pangur has entirely stolen his spot

#luckily babies completely rewrite your fucking brain and as a grandparent it happens twice#so by the time it happens you don’t even care because you’ve got a bad case of double baby mush#your baby had a baby no rationality left

these tags sent me

Why do I feel vaguely threatened

hmmm

The beast is angelic in nature

yeah.

u still use a nokia?? haha loser btw how was bingo night did u remember to take ur medication? 

no character design will ever top this absolute unit of a man

Since I’m not seeing anyone mention this in the reblogs, all credit for this design should go to Bill Sienkiewicz, artist of Frank Miller’s Daredevil: Love & War, which was the basis for his Spider-Verse appearance.

It’s another reason why I think Spider-Verse is a masterpiece, because they looked at this and didn’t go “oh that’s too cartoony and cheesy and comic-book-y.” They embraced the Sienkiewicz version of Kingpin who looks like a well-dressed walk-in freezer and it was awesome.

The barber showing off what he’s done to another guy’s hair is such a turn-on.

Imagine getting a haircut so bad it gets put on a bad haircut humiliation fetish blog

#have u considered: moogle gaps

i have now thank you

and thank you to @somnambule-plus​ for my new favorite word… schoogle

thank you @firstfandomfangirl​

crying

i have a migraine right now and this is what having a migraine reads like

[ID: a collection of edited google logos. They say: Toogle Granslate, Doogle Grive, Poogle Glay, Moogle Gaps, Noogle Gews, Schoogle Golar, Doogle Gocs, Hoogle Gangouts, Foogle Gorms and Soogle Glides. EndID]

i hate pacman.  stop eating all the dots.  leave some dots for the rest of us you stupid piece of circle

anyway did i ever tell you guys about how I owe my life to an enderman when playing minecraft

i didn't even know that this was possible but I had to say thank you looking at the damn ground

stop saying “sorry for party rocking”, instead try “thank you for your allowing me to party rock” or “I appreciate you being patient with me as I party rock, in the house tonight”

butthole reveal if this gets to 100k before the year ends

hello and welcome to “is this word tumblr approved?” a post where i take it upon myself to find out if a word is still approved

NUT

status: approved

BALLSACK

status: approved

MILKERS

status: approved

MILF

status: banned

MILFY

status: approved

Tiny unit

(via)

since most people who can wear them are (correctly) continuing to wear masks even when it's not mandatory i feel like we should start getting more creative with it. like where can i get a venetian carnival mask or something that lets me practice safe social distancing and avoid facial recognition software in style

me and the girls on our way to the gas station 7/11 to pick up some chips and slushies