The only parallel to ever exist btw
I love the Truman show. High kin (not a good thing).
What I love more though? I love the idea of an au with him suing Christof, the studio, and anyone who worked on the show and he and Sylvia get their money's worth and move to Fiji and relax there in the winter and travel all over during the summers. her helping him through derealization episodes and keeping him grounded through the process of him dealing with his whole life being fake for 30 years and sometimes still thinking that and thinking she's lying, or if she suggests a special type of cereal or something where she says maybe "what about Frosted Flakes instead? I always liked them better than the off brand" and then helping him and grounding him and assuring him that she wasn't trying to sell him or anyone anything.
I like to think maybe he picked up painting with her too because he has a visceral reaction to cameras and (I know the movie doesn't take place in modern times but if it did take place in modern times) him still having a landline and flip phone, or even just a pager of all things because he doesn't want to ever have a camera on him. He has to work through that because HEY security cameras, phones being everywhere, etc. but still
It's kinda funny imagining him on a rollercoaster for the first time and after making sure the picture was deleted from the parks data base, him forcing Sylvia to get on with him again and he covers his face just in time, and he gets all excited when he sees he can't be seen on the camera and just goes "YESSSS HAH! CANT SEE ME NOW!" And drags off Sylvia just laughing his ass off because he feels in control of it for once.
Idk just sounds fun. Throwing out there. Anywho
the Truman Show is such a good movie. the attention to detail throughout the entire movie is just amazing! Marlon stocking the vending machine while talking to Truman, but then quickly taking them out when Truman's not looking. Truman needing to take vitamins because he's never been in the sun. all the funky camera angles, and how Meryl frequently smiles directly at them. the way all the "background characters" just act so plain weird! when Truman starts to realize something's up, and steps out of his routine, they all continue playing their parts even though in reality people would stare at the man running and shouting! if someone driving almost ran into someone who was being careless, they would hop out of the car and go what are you doing! people would grumble and complain that the bus wasn't working, not quickly get off the bus as if they were waiting for the announcement! the lack of headrests in the vehicles so they can get better camera angles. the way everything is just too crisp, and clean to be real. i just love this movie so much
if you told shadow you're trans he'd ask you what that is and after you'd explain it to him he'd go "so say you've..."transitioned" to the ultimate version of yourself?.... i can respect that." and then he'd kick you in the face
i had to do it im sorry
I would have been such a faggy lil caveboy, they'd be like "grug come learn hunt and throw spear now" and id be like waaaa no let me pick berry with old gran. I'm the best berrypicker and all the elders love me and are soso sad seeing me cry getting dragged off to do hunting.
At dark around the fire, uup the wise would say some shit like "different flower bloom different way, let grug bloom" and everyone would be like "aaaaaa thog see now, thank you uup the wise." so next day im allowed to pick berry and seed with old gran again and she lets me eat the juiciest ones (o^－^o)
Talking to myself out loud like a point and click protagonist
Losing it over some of y'all's tags btw Here's my favorites
and lastly.
good night
Posting this iconic piece of media that I just NEVER found online isolated except in an archived reddit thread
I finally get context and it's way funnier than the way people use it as a meme.
Please, if you can, take a moment to read and share this because I feel like I'm screaming underwater.
NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) stigma is rampant right now, and seems to be getting progressively worse. Everyone is using it as a buzzword in the worst ways possible, spreading misinformation and hatred against a real disorder.
I could go on a long time about how this happened, why it's factually incorrect (and what the disorder actually IS), why it's harmful, and the changes I'd like to see. But to keep this concise, I'll simply link to a few posts under the cut for further reading.
The point of this post is a plea. Please help stop the spread of stigma. Even in mental health communities, even around others with personality disorders, in neurodivergent "safe" spaces, other communities I thought people would be supportive in (e.g. trans support groups, progressive spaces in general), it keeps coming up. So I'm willing to bet that a lot of people on this site need to see this.
Because it's so hard to exist in this world.
My disorder already makes me feel as if I'm worthless and unlovable, like there's something inherently wrong and damaged about me. And it's so much harder to fight that and heal when my daily life consists of:
- Laughing and spending time with my friends, doing my utmost best to connect and stay present and focused on them, trying to let my guards down and be real and believe I'm lovable- when suddenly they throw out the word "narcissist" to describe horrible people or someone they hate, or the conversation turns to how evil "people with narcissistic personality disorder" are. (Seriously, you don't know which of your friends might have NPD and feels like shit when you say those things & now knows that you'd hate them if you knew.)
- Trying to look up "mental health positivity for people with npd", "mental health positivity cluster bs", only to find a) none of that, and b) more of the same old vile shit that makes me feel terrible about myself.
- Having a hard time (which is constant at this point) and trying to look up resources for myself, only to again, find the same stigma. And no resources.
- Not having any clue how to help myself, because even the mental health field is spitting so much vitriol at people with DISORDERS (who they're supposed to be helping!) that there's no solid research or therapy programs for people like me.
- Losing close friends when they find out, despite us having had a good relationship before, and them KNOWING me and knowing that I'm not like the trending image of pwNPD. Because now they only see me through the lens of stigma and misinformation.
- Hearing the same stigma come up literally wherever I go. Clubs. Meetings. Any online space. At the bus stop. At the mall. At a restaurant. At work. Buzzword of the year that everyone loooves loudly throwing around with their friends or over the phone. Feels awesome for me, makes my day so much better/s
I could go on for a long time, but I'm scared no one will read/rb this if it gets too much longer.
So please. Stop using the word "narcissist" as a synonym for "abusive".
Stop bringing up people you hate who you believe to have NPD because of a stigmatizing article full of misinformation whenever someone with actual NPD opens their mouth. (Imagine if people did that with any other disorder! "Hey, I'm autistic." "Oh... my old roommate screamed at me whenever I made noise around him, and didn't understand my needs, which seems like sensory overload and difficulty with social cues. He was definitely autistic. But as long as you're self-aware and always restraining your innate desire to be an abusive asshole, you're okay I guess, maybe." ...See how offensive and ignorant that is?)
Stop preventing healthcare for people with a disorder just because it's trendy to use us as a scapegoat.
If you got this far, thank you for reading, and please share this if you can. Further reading is under the cut.
Revised Criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder
(designed by me, open to thoughts and commentary. this isn't an official revision, seeing as I'm not a contributor to the DSM. rather, the intent is to clarify the wording and produce a version that is less subjective and ambiguous.)
The essential features of a personality disorder are impairments in personality (self and interpersonal) functioning and the presence of maladaptive traits. To diagnose narcissistic personality disorder, the following criteria must be met:
A. Significant impairments in personality functioning manifest by:
1. Impairments in self functioning (a or b):
a. Identity: Excessive reference to others for self-definition and self-esteem regulation; exaggerated self-appraisal may be inflated or deflated, or vacillate between extremes; emotional regulation mirrors fluctuations in self-esteem.
b. Self-direction: Goal-setting is based on gaining approval from others; personal standards are unreasonably high in order to see oneself as exceptional, or too low based on a sense of entitlement; often unaware of own motivations.
AND
2. Impairments in interpersonal functioning (a or b):
a. Empathy: Impaired ability to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others; excessively attuned to reactions of others, but only if perceived as relevant to self; over- or underestimate of own effect on others.
b. Intimacy: A sense of detachment in relationships; higher levels of emotional withdrawal associated with larger degrees of closeness; a tendency to focus on all aspects of the relationship except for the feelings and experiences of the other, unless perceived as relevant to self
B. Maladaptive traits characterized by an attempt to protect oneself from potential criticism, and from mistreatment or general life dissatisfaction associated with criticism, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:
1. Grandiose sense of self (e.g., believes that they are inherently more powerful or capable than others in some way and may place an enormous pressure on themself to measure up to this self-image, believes that they are uniquely bad or inferior in some way, may struggle with paranoia due to an over-estimation of effect on others)
2. Attempt to regulate emotions and self-esteem through fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love, while avoiding real-life situations that conflict with this internal narrative
3. Association with or avoidance of people, groups, or institutions based upon an attempt to gain admiration or avoid criticism
4. Seeks out admiration in an attempt to regulate mood; may struggle with self-destructive behaviors (i.e., isolation, impulsivity, self-punishment, overexertion, etc.), intensely unpleasant emotions, or lack of motivation when they don't feel admired
5. An expectation of automatic agreement or compliance associated with feelings of security, i.e., an expectation that others will automatically agree or comply with them followed by confusion or distress if these expectations are unmet, attempts to attain closeness with others via agreeing and complying with everything the other person wants, or attempts to get the other person to agree and comply with everything they want
6. Periods of intense boredom or dissatisfaction resulting from a lack of connection with others; an attempt to regulate these emotions through material pursuits, personal gain, or self-destructive behaviors
7. May miss social cues or struggle with self-awareness due to a lack of empathy or a preoccupation with their self-image
8. Frequent comparisons to others, often followed by bitterness towards self or others for perceived differences in likability
9. Difficulties in emotional and behavioral regulation in response to perceived criticism or slights, as characterized by one (or more) of the following:
- Fight response (e.g., intense anger towards self or others, self-punishment, hostility, destructive behavior)
- Flight response (e.g., isolation, avoidance of the source of perceived criticism, frantic attempts to distract self)
- Freeze response (e.g., brain fog, dissociation, major drops in motivation, not addressing or resolving the situation)
- Fawn response (e.g., over-apologizing, heavily internalizing the perceived criticism, preoccupation with seeking approval or assurance)
C. The impairments in personality functioning and the individual's personality trait expression are relatively stable across time and consistent across situations.
D. The impairments in personality functioning and the individual's personality trait expression are not better understood as normative for the individual's developmental stage or socio-cultural environment.
E. The impairments in personality functioning and the individual's personality trait expression are not solely due to the direct physiological effects of a substance (e.g., a drug of abuse, medication) or a general medical condition (e.g., severe head trauma).
Changes I made and why:
1: Re-wrote the section for intimacy in 2B. Its original wording didn't address the actual problem present within the disorder, and instead focused on how others might perceive the symptom.
In people who have a history of trauma or who were otherwise denied the opportunity to form safe and healthy connections with others, it's a natural defense mechanism to fixate on oneself within a relationship:
Preoccupation with how they're perceived by the other person (Subconscious conditioning: Are they about to hurt me for something they dislike about me? If so, how can I change myself or their viewpoint of me to protect myself?)
Positive feelings, and feelings of closeness, prompted by feeling adored (Subconscious conditioning: We're all born with the need for human connection, but when we grow up being abused and neglected when caregivers dislike something about us, the only times we're safe to feel positive and close feelings with another person are when it's clear that they're happy with us)
Opportunity for personal gain potentially being one of the biggest factors in deciding whether or not to enter or remain in a relationship (Subconscious conditioning: If an unsafe caregiver isn't providing necessities or something that will help with self-soothing or happiness, then there's no point risking one's safety by interacting with them more than necessary)
Detachment from the other person (Subconscious conditioning: caring about* and having a personal interest in other people turned out to be exceedingly painful and potentially dangerous, and may have been used against us)
*I am not saying that detachment necessarily means not caring about the other person- just that we may be more prone to emotionally detaching or not being as preoccupied with the experiences of the other person.
In every relationship, there is a focus on the self, a focus on the other person, and a focus on the experiences that come with the relationship. The lack of focus on the other person doesn't mean that the other two focuses are abnormal or shouldn't exist; it simply means that someone may struggle with mutuality, usually due to past experiences with trauma. While this obviously can put a strain on relationships, it does not mean that someone is intentionally being exploitative, that they only care about the other person's well-being as long as they're benefiting them in some way, or even that they don't desire a genuinely close relationship with someone.
2: Rewrote the entire B section, and re-introduced elements from the DSM-IV. The B section in the DSM-V had a lot of subjective and ambiguous parts, and lacked focus on the actual issue and the various ways that issue could present. I also changed the wording from "pathological personality traits" to "maladaptive traits".
3: Changed or rewrote symptoms listed in section B to be less subjective and to place the emphasis on how the disorder affects the person who has it, as opposed to how others may perceive the symptoms. I also expanded it somewhat to include variations in how the root issue may present.
looks at you
looks at you
@bettsplendens i'd just like you to know that this is my favorite comment on this post and i'd like it to be memorialized
i have an opposite of bullying technique every artfight where i sniff out ppl who are like 13 and i mass compliment their stuff w a drawing. everyone should do this. get your friends to do it, like a biker gang
i articulated this rather sloppily so, agreeing with people in the tags, encouraging kids with ocs from fandoms you may have grown up with that were seen as “cringey” is incredibly cathartic. giving art to beginner or struggling artists boosts their spirit during artfight as well. you or a group of your friends showing anyone who might be ignored because of their interests or their skill not being “good enough” that You Care is just a cool thing to do and will probably make your younger self happy too. if you have the time, go for it!
sometimes i wish i had facial hair
like sexy stubble or something that would be so cool
perfect
im not coming back to tumblr i just needed to find this post in order to dunk on my younger self. you absolute baby buffoon. you dumbass
we should set more tv shows in fake US states the way we make up fake european countries for disney channel originals and hallmark movies
cancel your plans we’re thinking about the pale blue dot voyager pic tonight
this image of earth from saturn rattles around in my skull at all hours of the day
Please don’t dox me guys :(
#The best thing about Barbie (2023) is probably Ryan Gosling who method acted too hard
Marvel Comics #1000: We’re Calling Him Ben
I feel this is an important addition. He saves so many people on a regular basis that this just keeps happening. And he feels so much for his uncle that the answer is always the same.
just-odradek
…. This hits different when you realise he’s canonically Jewish
Can you please elaborate ? I’m curious as to what it means
just-odradek
You can read a pretty good summary of it here, but as (most likely) Ashkenazi Jews, PP probably follows the minhag (custom) that says “that by naming a newborn child after a deceased loved one, the soul lives on through the child.” (Quoted from the site linked above.) And given how his Uncle Ben died, it just makes it all the more sadder tbh.
another fine distinction is that the soul isn’t thought to be reincarnated, it’s that the memory of the loved one is kept alive and more good deeds in life can be inspired by (and thus partially attributed to) the dead. ‘may their memory be a blessing’–the memory of the deceased is honored, respected, and who they were is retold as inspiration to the next generation.
ben’s memory is a blessing. that’s extremely jewish. spiderman is inspired not just by the shame of his death, but by the moral teachings he’d given peter in life. and his name given to these babies is another part of it: babies named in spiderman’s honor are also very honestly and truly named in his honor, and continue to be blessings to the world.
it’s very joyous, i think. very sweet.
