The Cat's Pajamas

Same energy

that thing about how removing the middle 2 panels of a cad comic makes it funnier is true 

holy shit

I can’t even imagine what meaningless filler went into panels 2-3.

oh my god these are actually funny

this is 100% true and once you remove the horrible filler bullshit its comedy gold

this is how i run in nightmares

I’ve never been able to describe what it’s like running in nightmares. This gif is a PERFECT representation!

The Simpsons, Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington (1991) dir. Wes Archer

Same energy

one time i texted my fireman dad saying something was “lit” and he responded “please dont say that”

My dad has a hard time playing magic the gathering with me cause he’s a dealer at a casino, and I see his soul leave his body every time I shuffle my cards.

Boot lickers will listen to punk music and "agree" with it bc they don't know they're being made fun of

Like......... Sir you're part of the machine that's being raged against you are aware of this yes?

If you catch a republican listening to greenday you get to steal their kneecaps.

“Anne Bonny and Mary Read were pirates, as renowned for their ruthlessness as for their gender, and during their short careers challenged the sailors’ adage that a woman’s presence on shipboard invites bad luck.”

Sculpture by Erik Christianson.

I’m not entirely sure that the statue really needed to have a tit out.

How dare women try to have nipples.

Actually I’ve seen this before and I can tell you— it’s because these women were bad ass pirates and when they killed someone they’d expose one or both breasts so that when their victim died, (s)he knew that they were killed by a woman.

ACTUALLY Anne Bonny purposely wore loose fitting clothes and displayed her breasts openly at all times during battle - mainly because men were distracted by them, and she took pleasure in killing said men while they were too busy staring at her breasts. Mary Read dressed mainly as a man (after posing as her deceased brother, Mark, for the entirety of her childhood) and both ladies cross-dressed from time to time, hopping between ships. They were known as the ‘fierce hell cats’ due to their ferocious tempers, and were key elements to Captain ‘Calico Jack’ Rackham’s crew - they were the only two known female pirates in the Golden Age of Caribbean piracy. IN FACT, when the ship was captured by the British Navy, Anne and Mary were the ONLY TWO pirates who fought while the males of the crew hid - they were all tried to be hung as pirates but Bonny and Read were both pregnant and were pardoned.

Calico Jack was a lover to Bonny, and as he was to be hung, Bonny’s final words to him were, “Had you fought like a man, you need not be hung like a dog.” Bonny and Read were possibly two of the most badass fucking pirates and they were FEMALE. The more you know. 

And on top of all that, exposed breasts have a long and storied history of symbolism in art. They mean all sorts of things. The sculptor may have chosen to expose her left breast specifically to denote her courage–her heart is exposed–or to evoke comparison to Amazon warriors, who cut off their right breasts.

Titties are complex in art.

Fascinating! 

From the sounds of it they proved rather the idea women were bad luck on a ship cus if they boarded yours you were shit out of luck

Also, there are various accounts that Bonny and Read were actually lovers.

Where the fuck is this movie?

You will get so kissed.

Nick Offerman is goddamn national treasure and this special was fantastic. Read his books, you filthy animals

She’s starting early

I can’t believe he’s gone

nae nae

And 30 years of The Jeffersons reruns. 

modern warfare