is it wrong that i actually liked the way the show is handling will’s pining storyline? allow me to explain: it feels so real to me, i cried for the character because i relate to his situation on such a personal level. i was in love with my best friend since i was 12, my feelings for her didn’t leave until i was 18. she’s heterosexual, i’m (obviously) not and i had to sit there with her, give her relationship advice and encouragement for every guy she ever had any amount of interest in. i had to watch her fall in and out of love with people, and hide my feelings behind my encouragement because i knew my feelings would destroy our friendship and that i would be coming out to her at the cost of losing her. it was painful, it was traumatizing and it made me miss out on so many teenaged experiences because i was so hung up on her and wishing, hoping that one day she’d change her mind about me.
will’s storyline is the most heart wrenching, to me, this show has ever had because while he didn’t have the coming out so many people wanted, he is representing so many closeted, hurting kids that go through this regularly, that are living his situation. and unfortunately, life doesn’t work out the way fandoms want it to. in real life, you confess and 98% of the time, they don’t feel the same and your friendship is destroyed. and that’s in MODERN time, let alone the 80s when being anything other than heterosexual was demonized and stereotyped. will has every right to be scared, to not be ready, to not outright say he’s gay because he doesn’t know what will happen afterwards. he doesn’t know if he’ll be accepted or if his best friends will be weird around him and not want him around anymore. and let’s face it, a kid like mike in the 80s, would definitely be the type to make gay jokes and be a little homophobic. obviously they can’t portray that in the show because he’s a main character but, if I was will? I’d genuinely believe mike would be grossed out by my sexuality. I would not feel comfortable coming out to mike in general, let alone if I had feelings for him. to make matters worse, they’re like 14-15 years old? if mike was going to be uneducated and small minded at any point in life, it’d be around that age and I’m saying that from experience, my old best friend was insanely homophobic around that age and stayed that way until we were 17-ish. not too mention, they’re also from a small, obviously religious town? and probably had little to no interaction with lgbt+ people as a result? at least not any that were out of the closet. i mean, even robin, she came out when coming down from a high and you can’t even say it was because she was confident or comfortable with steve, it was obvious in her coming out scene that she was waiting for him to become upset with her. she expected a bad reaction at first. now, she’s older than will, has had more time to explore her sexuality and figure herself out, and still, she was nervous and it took all of that for her to say something. imagine will, so young and frightened and insecure, surrounded by zero support (he didn’t get jonathan’s until vol 2 and even that was more of a generalized ‘I’ll always be here’ type) and in love with his best friend. that’s fucking terrifying and when in that position, you feel like the entire world is against you and like somethings just wrong with you.
say what you want about the duffer bros writing, but they captured that feeling of helplessness, internalized hatred and pain perfectly. they took into account the situation, the background and the character, and although it wasn’t what anyone (even myself) was expecting or wanted, it was spot on. i felt like i was watching a version of myself on the screen, it took me back and made me feel like I was watching someone live part of my personal story. i sobbed like a baby at will’s van scene and at mileven’s confession, seeing him there, hearing what mike had to say, I LIVED that shit and noah and the duffer bros hit me harder than any other piece of media ever has. it was a punch in the gut and I applaud them for showing us the hard to swallow part of someone’s coming out. that’s what will is going through at the end of the season, and I have no doubt that they will turn it around and show us the closure that comes after in the next season. the letting go, the picking yourself up and realizing you’re worth more, that you deserve better. I have a strong feeling that’s where will’s story is headed and I love it. furthermore, there’s no way they didn’t know the backlash and anger they’d get for portraying it this way, especially considering pride month just ended. but they still bit the bullet and risked losing tons of viewers to portray the bitter, frustrating and cruel part of both having feelings for your best friend and struggling with your sexuality as a young teen. that takes guts and tells me that they have a plan for where will is going, that they aren’t just winging it and giving us unrealistic outcomes for a situation that is so much deeper than that and comes with so many emotions and fears. that they aren’t taking will’s sexuality at face value and tossing a half hearted happy ending in his direction just to please viewers. that they’re actually dedicated to writing a nuanced, tough to swallow, hard to watch plot that I don’t doubt will end in a much better way than people are assuming. we are seeing a vital piece of cinema history starting to play out, and i know this will go on to be the performance of noah’s life.
it isn’t poor writing or queer baiting, they’re setting us up for something so much bigger than that. and so much better than what we were expecting this season. mark my words, season five will be the most amazing performance noah and finn have ever put on, and whether it ends in mike accepting will’s feelings or not, doesn’t fucking matter because it’s not about him. it’s not about byler. it’s not about ships or what actor says what. it’s about a kid struggling to accept himself and his feelings, and pulling himself out and away from internalized homophobia, understanding what he’s worth and finding the confidence to come out on his own time and his own terms. that’s what it’s about. that scene, about being a mistake, watch it come around in full circle with will in season five, accepting that he is not a mistake and that NO ONE, not even mike, can make him feel that way because HE knows who he is and HE loves himself enough to not care anymore.
so yeah, that’s my take and how I feel about the way the season ended. feel free to tell me I’m wrong but, I have more faith in where this is going and I really think it’s going to end beautifully. I loved the plot, I loved the build up, I loved the teasing and pining and pain. it sent me back to my early teenaged years. and while he didn’t officially come out this season, they’re definitely building it up to be huge in the next.
