Goat Hellsite

Whew what an exhausting few days. I’m relieved but so tired

my grandma sent me a vintage book of texas postcards and this is the best one

@kaijutegu

that's fucking it. bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark

A Gator gives a lecture on nucleosynthesis.

Take him home <3

just so you know

hey folks,

my wife and i are moving this month to escape a really stressful and unsafe situation. we have secured an apartment but we are gonna need all the help we can get. our goal is $2000 to help cover rent, the deposit, and other expenses by the end of August.

cashapp: $sorebay

venmo: tittyhurt

*waves my arm in an exaggerated motion* cmon guys! lets go lick the strap...together! *frolicks away*

i want everyone to know that i made this post in a delirious haze after like 13 straight hours of playing baldurs gate 3 on my computer that was rapidly becoming a space heater the entire time. anyway ive been enjoying the game. we dont need to talk about whose strap i was talking about in the original post. if you know me You Know

dragons if they had a site to review kobolds

Meanwhile, on the site the kobolds use to review dragons...

rule #1 of the world is that love is stored in the kitty cat

my apologies to puppy dogs everywhere

rule #1 of the world, fixed: love is stored in the Creature

rule #2 of the world is that biting is also stored in the creature

rule #3 is never talk to the police

still in shock how true and real this passage is

the gilgamesh burger, the patty of which is of course 2/3 wagyu beef and 1/3 pork

i will never escape my fate. but you are a poet regardless

kibblemancer

the central paradox is humans are supposedly above eating dog kibble

tabboo: eating anything but dog kibble

minor charge: eat dog kibble in front of someone. they have to be weirded out

significant charge: eat dog kibble in public, from a doggy bowl, very noticeably. must weird out at least 20 people

major charge: eat dog kibble on national television. become international news for eating dog kibble. weird out 500 people

minor spells:

kibble blast - bark at someone and spend 1 minor charge. a kibble flies out of your mouth. does damage equal to the dice you rolled added together

significant spells:

dog food - spend 3 significant charges. target becomes delicious to dogs, and dogs know it. lasts for as many minutes as your dice roll added up

major spell: become a dog

"oh y-yeah I'm just on all fours eating from a d-doggy bowl in public because-- i-it's for a spell! yes it's... it's important that you find me weird and that i get e-embarrassed and humiliated.... or the spell w-won't work (; >w<⁠)⊰⁠⊹ฺ"

distressing things to say to your friends

getting ready with the girrrlllss

part 1

cricket finds compliments very alarming

Nosebleed Kiss

Honey are you okay? You've reblogged Nosebleed Kiss again

i'm going through it

Kobolds are collectible and protectable.

bad

i looked up the source for this and its from an anime where a dude has to keep a constant boner for a month straight or he loses his house

is this the episode where he lost his house

I have not stopped thinking about this even once for the last 8 years