No bullshit guide on everything you need to know about the act of Self-Harm:-Alright, soldiers! Sit your asses down & listen up! I’mma tell the shit you gotta go through to cater to your lovely lesions! Your boy here is kind of...concerned, i noticed plenty of posts about toilet paper as bandages and that’s fucking nefarious, my dudes. Buckle up, let’s go on some first-aid tutorial shit, cupcakes!In this guide we’ll go in-depth on everything you need to know about this dangerous coping mechanism, how to care for it, how to manage the tools you use to self harm, infections & disease, know the layers of skin and what you nicked, the aftermath, scars and consequences of all this shit.Ps. I’m no doctor, just some fucking guy who worked as a sidekick to veterinarian, talking with doctors &. nurses, also experienced Hobby-surgeon :p
If you're ever worried about whether your writing is too self indulgent, I just want you to remember that Sharknado had 5 sequels. I'm only partway through watching Sharknado 6: It's About Time, but already they've traveled through time and ridden a pteronadon into a Sharknado so they could use the magic teleportation portal inside of it to travel forward in time to King Arthur's time, where they are currently battling a Sharknado full of fire-breathing dragon sharks with Excalibur, which is a chainsaw sword that calls lightning. You're fine. In fact, be a little more self indulgent if anything, because I am having a BLAST watching this specifically because I can see how much fun the writers were having.
Your persistence is admirable tumblr but even with this godawfully ugly update i can still edit john greens posts. So once again. suck my dick
I love these posts, they no longer exist at the source but we pass them between our blogs like a delightful digital oral history
im gonna say it.
you cannot separate monsterfucking from queerness.
& for the love of fuck i don’t need babygays coming at me with “you’re equating being gay with being a monster!” go back to tiktok, this is for the adults.
monsterfucking is so queer bc so many of us feel unlovable, so many of us can’t relate to real world affections & attractions. (aces & aros in particular)
so yeah, i wanna fuck that monster, bc deep down, i hope someone will love the monster i think i am.
also monsters are Very Hot & that needs no explanation so.
also monsters are
Very Hot & that needs no
explanation so.
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
여어- 히싸씨부리 （ ɔ̸ᴉʇɐ͟N͞さんのツイート ）
“NAFTER NOON!”
Every. Time. Every single time. I always get so delighted by this picture set. And I always forget what it’s followed up by. And then I see the “NAFTER NOON!” and absolutely lose it. I’m so glad this post exists.
This could save your life.
BOOST.
Absolutely vital information to have if you live where the waters freeze over.
I especially appreciate this guy's commitment to actually showing the steps himself. That cold-shock response is a bitch and willingly subjecting himself to it couldn't have been fun.
"Why don't the people of Gotham just move?"
Because it's a massive East Coast city but the property values are probably like $200 a month for a three bedroom apartment, and most Gothamites are like, "Hey, Bane never swore to break my back."
And here's the thing: you're not just moving out of Gotham City. You're moving into the rest of the DC universe. And it has hero-based power scaling.
Oh, Metropolis looks fucking great. But it gets invaded by aliens and robots and demigods, because Superman is there.
Wonder Woman's tangling with gods.
You go to Central City, and some Reverse-Flash motherfucker runs backwards from an alternate future and kicks your balls off at the speed of light.
You could move to the West Coast, and oh, an entire city just gets exploded by Cyborg Superman or some shit.
How about you move to Indianapolis, or Cleveland? Haha, no. They have no protector during the alien invasions, and you're in Cleveland
So stay in Gotham. Sure, you have lunatics, but you know that if you had a gun, you at least have a chance against the Joker or Riddler. Mongo of War-World would crush you. But Gotham just has creeps, and you know you have a chance. Even Bane, R'as Al-Ghul, Killer Croc, and Mr. Freeze are just slightly altered dudes. Oh no, Poison Ivy is going to kiss me to death! Who gives a shit, you kinda wanted to go out that way anyway.
There are super-intelligent telepathic gorilla warlords in Africa and the Greek titans are real and chained in the abyss
polish government has opened a website for ukrainians seeking safety and trying to cross the ukrainian-polish border:
ua.gov.pl
as of 13:10 polish time, it has been said as many people as possible will be let through the borders. they are also supposed to let through children who do not have passports, as to not divide families.
Ukraine, 26th Feb, 2022
A friend of mine told me yesterday that he didn’t realise how much Ukraine meant to him until now. I posted yesterday about the time we spent there, and we’re all getting super pre-occupied about the invasion. As I said in that post, I can’t get our waitress out of my head. I can sort of remember what she looked like now. She had an undercut. I think maybe her hair might have been blue? But - I will never know if she lives through this, and it’s driving me very slightly mad.
So naturally, my husband spent all day yesterday obsessively researching everything he could about it with the help of his journalist friends, as a way to help me process it.
This post is me putting it all in order, as a way to try and process my own emotional response as much as anything else (I freely admit there is an element of self-indulgence here). Please don’t take me as the spokesperson for Ukraine right now, nor as a solid reliable news source. But, I haven’t seen this stuff except in bits and pieces on Tumblr, so here we go.
(This is also not about why the invasion has happened. This post is solely about what has happened, and how the invasion is going.)
So, Putin and the rest of the world believed that this invasion would take 1-4 days. The plan was to push through fast, take Kyiv, and force Volodymyr Zelenskyy, the Ukrainian President, to surrender. Given Russia’s military might, it really looked likely.
Here is the conclusion of all that’s happened so far:
Ukraine is absolutely nailing this??? Actually???
They managed to defend every single city overnight, including Kyiv. They started rolling out and using these WW2-style anti-tank thingies that look a bit like angry gabbions, look, here’s a picture of one being delivered:
A bunch of spare iron girders turned into a hefty octopus of Russian misery, basically.
But it’s not just tanks they’re taking down, oh no. Ukraine successfully shot down a transport plane 20km from Kyiv. That is, I shit you not, the single biggest hit to the Russian military since the Second Chechen War. Volunteers from Lithuania, Poland, Latvia, Estonia, Azerbaijan and Israel are all entering Ukraine to help fight and bolster the anti-Russian forces, which is probably illustrative of how Eurovision voting is going to run for the next decade. Most countries have banned Russian planes from their air space. To help stop the Russian advance, Ukraine has made and installed new road signs, like this one:
I can only say a handful of sentences in Ukrainian, Tumblrs, but as I understand it, from top to bottom, it says:
“Fuck off”
“Fuck off again”
“Fuck off Russia”
Meanwhile, it turns out the Russian military might we feared is… possibly not quite as advertised?
They’re underfunded and badly trained. Ukraine captured 200 soldiers in one go, and most of them were confused 19 year olds with no training. The equipment is shite. The tanks keep running out of fuel. Russian soldiers keep abandoning their tanks and handing them over to the Ukrainian army. Putin’s plan was to take Kyiv fast and move on, and he didn’t have a plan B - hence these kids, playing soldier. Here is an image of a Russian tank receiving roadside assistance from Russia’s finest, an old Lada.
No one expected Zelenskyy to survive the night; but he did. America offered him asylum in the White House.
But he said no.
Zelenskyy remains in Kyiv, with his people.
And Putin, in his desperation to be adored, has turned Zelenskyy into a global icon and hero.
Here is something you may not know about Volodymyr Zelenskyy - he used to be a standup comedian. Was he any good? No idea - but what he IS good at is producing funny short videos he can put on Twitter and that, which are absolutely fantastic for Ukrainian morale. And morale is vital in an invasion like this, and Ukraine are smashing it out of the park there.
They are utilising the internet to its fullest extent. In addition to Zelenskyy’s videos, they’ve made sure that the final words of the Ukrainian defenders of Snake Island are known and now echoed around the world: “Russian warship, go fuck yourselves.” A video has gone viral of Ukrainians mocking a group of Russian soldiers whose tank had broken down and who didn’t know the way to Kyiv anyway, presumably because of all the new road signs. They have created a website that lists every single Russian death they can identify, partly so Russian mothers can have closure (thus also painting themselves as the defenders of decency and humanity), and partly for the enormous morale boost of the world knowing, categorically, that they’ve already killed 3700 Russian soldiers (over 100 of which were from that transport plane.) Not one word has leaked of Ukrainian casualties. I’m sure they’re devastating, but for morale purposes, they’re being kept quiet until the dust settles. Ukrainians have started setting up fake Tindr profiles to catfish Russian soldiers for intel, and they’re all 19 and lost, so it’s working. Plus, they’re using Grindr to actually track where the soldiers are, because it turns out Putin was not entirely correct about there being no gays in Russia.
So, Russia wants to cut their internet access. Can the Ukrainian Minister for Digital Transformation, Mykhailo Fedorov, shame a billionaire into providing aid?
This is crucial, remember. Atrocities happen best in the dark, and the world is watching - because of the internet. Morale is vital to maintain. Can they convince Elon Musk to help?
Yep.
Ukraine now has the fastest internet service in the world. The fastest, most stable internet service in human history, in fact. Russia cannot now disable it. The world watches.
Which is just as well, because then Anonymous decided to get involved, and have leaked the website database of the Russian Ministry of Defence. Lol. Also this happens:
And then the Russian propaganda channels started broadcasting the truth of what is happening in Ukraine. Double lol.
So what is the political response?
Well, in addition to closing airspace to Russian planes, loads of countries are sending weapons to Ukraine. Those that can’t are offering asylum. They’re also offering asylum to any Russian soldiers who surrender or defect, which is startlingly good tactics, and there are rumours of around 5000 Russian soldiers who have done just that. Germany, of course, has long had a block on lethal weapons transfer; but Germany recognise this shit for what it is. They’ve lifted the block, thus allowing the Netherlands to send weapons. Efforts are now underway to fast-track Ukraine into the EU. I presume they will consider the lack of pint glasses with crowns on to be a worthwhile price to pay.
So what about Russia’s supporters?
Belarusian leader Alexander Lukashenka helped Russia with this invasion. Now, this has happened:
Sviatlana Tsikhanouskaya was actually elected president, but some wild nonsense kept her out of power. She’s now running a government in exile. I have literally no idea what this means or will mean! But my god. She has a spine of steel, and this is not a good time to be happening for Putin.
And it’s really, really not, because then intel on a meeting of Putin and assembled Oligarchs LEAKS (hello Anonymous, probably). The highlights:
- This war is costing Russia $15bn a day
- He expected it to take ONE TO FOUR DAYS TO WIN
- It’s been two days and he is losing very badly, currently
- They will run out of rockets by day 4, maybe sooner
- After that they will be down to rifles and ammo
- It will take 3-4 months to make more significant weapons, except they need raw materials, and the countries that can provide them… have cut supply lines
- If the war lasts 10 days, Russia will have completely run out of money and weapons
- It’s only day 2, and Russian soldiers are knocking the doors of random Ukrainian homes begging for food and water because they’ve already run out
So, out of desperation, Putin turns to his greatest, closest and most trusted ally for help: Kazakhstan.
And Kazakhstan
SAYS NO
And then Ukraine shoots down a second Russian plane.
Anyway, I’m going to finish off with a final point. Morale is vital in this situation, so here is the message from the Ukrainian government at the minute, to everyone watching around the world:
Be VERY SUSPICIOUS of any negative news about Ukraine. Russia uses misinformation and propaganda. They will want to damage Ukrainian morale.
Use your social media to spread news of Ukrainian victories.
Don’t give oxygen to negative stories. Especially since they might not be true.
That’s genuinely something we can do to help. Every victory of Ukraine, blast it far and wide. So on that note, I’ll leave you with this:
Congrats to Natalia Antonova’s cousin’s son.
The concepts of NSFW is being cleared of the Internet under the false pretense of children's safety when it's really about the people in power sanitising for advertisers and pushing evangelical narratives AND that not enough is done to keep legitimately harmful content off of spaces that minors have access to are ideas that can coexist
My complete masterlist of works. Reblogs and commentary more than welcome!
Pimping my little creative corner of tumblr again, folks! Cum one, cum all. It’s smutty in here 😎 😂
March
It’s gonna be
ITS MAY
It’s nearly June
it seems i,,,, miscalculated
Embroidered Fossils North Carolina-based self-taught artist Rachel Crisp creates stunning embroidery of Dinosaur fossils surrounded by lush greens.