I like cake

(x)

a twitter thread that actually killed me

Thanks, tumblr mobile, for unintentionally making this even funnier

Just as I said, “is this ever going to load?” One gif loaded and honestly it answered my question perfectly.

Together they create the full set.

saw this again on my dash after reblog and…

tumblr black out poetry

this image is beautiful to me it is holy, this should be in a gallery

came home drunk last night and got way too excited to see my cat

Quick artistic rendition

I was at the coffeeshop in the village and someone asked me how my llamas are doing, and a woman overheard and told me that when she was a kid, her parents used to have a couple of llamas in their sheep farm, and every single sheep in their flock imprinted on one of the two llamas. Each sheep chose the best most charismatic llama according to mysterious sheep criteria, and never wavered in their ovine loyalty. Each of the two llamas was worshiped by a small sub-flock of devoted sheep who followed him everywhere like Jesus’s apostles and only left their field for transhumance when led by “their” llama. The funniest thing is the way this woman overheard the word “llama” and immediately came to sit next to me to tell me this, like she had waited since childhood to share her bewilderment about the two religious congregations of sheep led by rival llama prophets in her family farm.

i love the term "joshing." it's slang, meaning to joke or tease playfully. "i'm just joshing you." who is this notorious josh. who joshed so much that the whole concept got named after him

the one true Josh

Whenever this photo turns up I remember that all the Joshes came and fought and then they made that little Josh's entire life by declaring him the winner and I get a little choked up.

I don’t know what’s going on here but I’m in

yeah, sure I’ll reblog that

Joint Soul by Pavel Kolomeyets

Brazil is the only non-Muslim country to host the most Shi'a Muslims in the world

Brazil has the "most X-people outside of X-place" of like, most kinds of people tbh

Brazil famously has the highest amount of Lebanese people in the world, including in Lebanon itself

literally Brazil is always "the largest X nation outside of X"

everyone tag your newly discovered genders

Please, never let this meme die.

This is the best one I’ve seen so far

What kind of quantum fucking memeing from 2056 are you people beaming to us

It’s fucking back

shooting star. i can’t believe i’m hearing shooting star again in the year 2020

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

imagine going to a house party and ask to go to the bathroom and like theres a dark souls silver knight guarding a chest in there. and like you ask him to not look but he doesn’t respond at all. He’s not like agro, or staring at you with intent, but he’s FULLY aware of your presence and watching you like you intend to steal

Really enjoying the bathroom knight rp

Incredible Stuff. Based.

i saw a man at work the other day wearing a shirt that said "i was normal 2 pomeranians ago" with pictures of his pomeranians on it. important to note he had his pomeranians in his cart

I love our funky chai-loving desi spiderman sm <3

Okay. Ok. Here is the story of Finn and the Dragon Egg. When Finn was around 3 ½ I took him to a comic convention about an hour away. He was so excited! He dressed up as Dipper from Gravity Falls and I told him he could pick one (1) piece of merch to purchase. Well. My child found the vendor selling dragon eggs. Beautiful. Hard and scaled. Obviously hand-painted and packaged with obvious care in cute little crates. He immediately knew that was what he wanted. I told him he had to wait and look at other merch before making his final decision. Of course, two hours later we were right back at the dragon egg vendor. He picked a beautiful pink and purple one. They gently wrapped it and he carried it very carefully back to the car and through the hour-long car trip home.

Only. When we got home he told me “Mom, I Can’t Wait until my egg hatches into a baby dragon!!!!” I panicked. “Well.” I said, sweating profusely. “The thing about dragons is…they actually take 300 years to hatch.” At 3 ½ he wasn’t really sure what that meant. “So it might not hatch during your lifetime. But you are responsible for the egg and taking care of it and keeping it safe, okay?” I told him what an important responsibility it is to care for a dragon egg. How special and precious it is. So he reads to it every day, says good morning every morning, good night before bed, sometimes he takes it out of its nest box and holds it, extremely carefully. In the winter he wraps it in its own little blanket.

Finn is almost six now and he’s still a very responsible dragon egg caregiver. And that’s the story of how our family came to be the keeper of a dragon.