Nothing to see here

"this whole country mollycoddles christians and i'm fucking tired of it!"

happy summer to dykes in tank tops and basketball shorts, goths who's makeup is melting, little kids catching frogs and fireflies, guys who just bring their guitar everywhere now, 13 yr olds very obviously in their emo phase during a family vacation, gas station employees, old people sitting on porches, and dogs swimming at the beach

when gerard way sings "the broken, the beaten, and the damned" and when kermit the frog sings "the lovers, the dreamers, and me" they're talking about the same people btw

this stupid twink wont share his fucking doritos 

that’s ellen degeneres

Not so generes now

My brother's girlfriend had HPV, so he went to get himself the HPV vaccine. There is a fee to pay (nothing much, something like €87) but it's completely free if you're in one of the "at risk" groups.

"What does that mean," he asks. "It's free if you're gay," he's told. "Ah. Would I have to like, prove it, or...?" "Just put in a check mark here."

My brother is in no way, shape or form attracted to men, but also he's stingy as it gets. So now he's officially gay. Congrats bro.

"Doctor, give it to me straight" "You sure, there's a fee" "… Give it to me gay"

there’s a war between Sucking and Fucking

you people cannot be trusted in the war room

for what purpose 

i guess 

The hilarious part is that the mind flayers don’t even get to control the rats afterwards. Cranium rats’ whole deal is telepathically linking up into a super-intelligent hive mind, and while each individual rat still has the stat block of an ordinary rat, the gestalt as a whole is capable of having class levels. So now you’ve got a swarm of rats that is collectively a 20th level wizard, has a higher Intelligence score than you do, and is both willing and able to cast meteor swarm on your tentacled ass if they think you’re disrespecting them. How well did that work out for you, pal?

hey does this mean someone could play as a swarm of cranium rats in a trench coat?

I know somebody who actually did play a cranium rat swarm barbarian in an ongoing campaign several years back. I’m about 90% convinced they created that character purely as an excuse to shout “RAT RAGE”.

I had a player once play a swarm of cranium rats as, indeed, a wizard. they were incredibly egotistical and wore a full sized wizard cape over the whole swarm. on top of the tiny ones each rat wore. i will always love Lord Rodentius Squeakeasy

Despite all my rage I am still just a cranium rat mage

Cranium rat, the 230th Known One.

You can only reblog this today or until the next Monday, June 19th, 2034.

Staring at a girl wishing desperately I could tell her how much I love her (i'm at the zoo and the girl is a komodo dragon)

John Wojtowicz poses at the Brooklyn branch Chase Bank that he robbed in 1972 in an attempt to fund sexual reassignment surgery for his lover.

world's smallest chihuahua found alive and well resting in a warm corn tortilla

Condom machines off for the royal period of mourning💔💔💔

Blåhaj has a son???

Junior, the transmasc mascot, with his bowtie and suspenders 🥰

I need to see a bitches arm vein while she chokes me, I need a death grip on my throat

He would not fucking say that

That's not how demographics work.

It could be if we’re all brave enough

Reblog to turn everybody gay by 2047

as always, xkcd has a comic for this

i learned that actor Danny Trejo has the most on-screen deaths of anyone in Hollywood history, with 65. Followed by Christopher Lee (60), Lance Henriksen (51), Vincent Price (41), Dennis Hopper (41), Boris Karloff (41), and John Hurt (39). (x)

Yet poor Sean Bean is stuck with the reputation for dying in every movie. Unfair.

Give him time, he still has many years of dying yet to come.

Also there’s the question of density vs quantity. If you make a hundred movies and die in 50, and someone else makes 30 movies and dies in 30, the first one has died more, but the second one has died more often per movie.

It’s the DPM ratio that really counts, IMO.

65/402 16% Danny Trejo 60/282 21% Christopher Lee 51/259 20% Lance Henriksen 41/211 19% Vincent Price 41/205 20% Dennis Hopper 41/204 20% Boris Karloff 39/209 19% John Hurt 33/117 28% Sean Bean

Now THOSE are some numbers!