its so scary to put yourself out there but a SINGLE message saying "hi i loved what you made it touched me in some way" makes it all worth it 10000%

daily reminder that if you like something someone made tell! them! tell them tell them tell them TELL THEM

Hes so me

Clash of titties

if this isnt gender equality i dont know

Stand battle

A 4th century CE statue of Aphroditos. Her cock wards off evil spirits. Reblog to rid your blog of evil spirits.

Official Aphrodite’s Cock Post (It Wards Off Evil Spirits)

This is why aliens don’t want us in their Starfleet.

Are you fucking kidding this is why aliens should be begging us to join their Starfleet. The precision?? The CONTROL?? The absolute mastery this driver has over their 20+ ton of steel is superhuman. This person could weave a mothership through an asteroid belt without making a single scratch on the hull. Foh “aliens don’t want us” aliens should be sucking our dicks.

Throwback to all these Jesus comics I drew in 2012…

Good post OP

Good post, OP, and if you ever decide to do another may I please suggest “NOT IN HEBREW IT DOESN’T” as a punchline? So much of the Old Testament is HORRIFICALLY translated from the Tanakh, it drives me batty.

WAIT WAIT WHAT DOES IT SAY?????? I NEED TO LIKE,, DESTROY MI MUM FOR BEING REALLY HOMOPHOBIC

Okay, so, strictly speaking, the infamous Leviticus 18:22 does say “forbidden.” Here’s the thing:

Apparently tumblr mobile doesn’t want to show @prismatic-bell ’s long and in-depth essay, so here’s the screenshots, because it still shows up on mobile browsers:

Much appreciated.

I love when scholarship and history debunks bullshit

…I sadly have more bullshit to report.

“removed for violating guidelines”, EVERY screenshot.

…goddamnit

Let’s try this again

I am horrified that @prismatic-bell keeps getting censored + this info is gold.

Many thanks, @pulmonary-poultry. This isn’t the only Jewish post of mine that’s mysteriously stopped showing up in searches and/or vanished from my blog entirely, but it is the one I get the most requests to repost, so this saves me from having to rewrite the whole damned essay. @the-invisible-self, thanks for bringing it to my attention that someone was able to preserve the post!

i was doing a bunch of fact checking earlier and as far as I can tell this is 100% true

which should fucking HORRIFY everybody because white phosphorous is a nasty, cruel and torturous weapon that should never be used against anyone let alone civilians.

basically it burns and burns until there is no more contact with oxygen, so shards of it will burn their way down to bone inside the victim's body and often re-ignite when doctors try to dig them out. It is easily fatal or permanently disabling and causes excruciating injuries

Jesus fucking christ

Unmute !

HOLD THE LINE!! KEEP PUSHING!!!!!

Sorry babes but as someone who lived lug around 500 cds they can die. To me lps are at least pretty and pretentious like a fine wine. Cds have no point

the point is cds are sexy as hell. sorry you dont know what sex is.

visual diagram btw ^

As someone who started listening to music on vinyl back when 8-tracks were still a thing, who saw the switch from them to cassettes and then to CDs, I can promise that recording peaked with CDs. Suddenly shuffle was a thing. they were more portable than vinyl, they didn't get chewed up just because the player got dirty, they had almost no moving parts, they were easy to rip, easy to queue up a song, and you could both carry around your media and easily loan (or resell) it - it combined the best of purely digital music with the best of cassettes, and had better quality/less recording artifacts than any previous medium.

Physical media is also the point.

Today’s the day

It’s the day!!

He definitely did, but since the whole book is supposed to be a translation of something he found and not something he personally wrote, they’re switched for the audience’s convenience. There’s a lot more to it, but here’s a chart of Shire months from the appendices at the end of RoTK. Elves and men are different, but there was no handy chart.

Happy… [squints] Winterfilth, everybody

by OLD西米露

art republished with artist’s permission

Something I’ve always found rather curious about the Adventure Time fandom, specifically Bubbline shippers, is that nobody seems to talk about how the show slipped in what might be the most angsty, hardcore and emotionally raw Bubbline stories disguised as a wacky Rashomon-style recap in the episode Ketchup.

Like it’s pretty clear that Marceline is doing the whole ‘Lollipop Girl and Rockstar Girl’ puppet-show because she doesn’t want to traumatize BMO with what happened while they, Finn and Jake were gone, and also because she herself doesn’t want to revisit those memories directly.

But when we start reading between the lines and recognize that Marceline’s embellishments are really more to tone DOWN events, I think we get a very stark and raw depiction of what Marceline was doing when Patience set off Ooo’s elemental apocalypse.

Just to kick things off, how much does anyone want to bet that this joke translates to ‘Marceline and Bubblegum had a fight and Marcy was giving Bonnie some space… and because of that, Marceline wasn’t there to protect Bonnie when she was kidnapped by Patience.’?

Kinda adds another layer to Marcy’s whole ‘I was so afraid something bad would happen to you’ breakdown in Come Along With Me, doesn’t it?

Next we have ‘Rockstar Girl smacking off the potato-heads growing on her’ which pretty easily translates to; ‘while everyone else was getting overrun by the elements, Marceline was able to fight off the elemental contamination for possibly entire days while she tried to find a way to help Bubblegum’. And given what we see with Finn and Jake only able to resist the contamination for maybe a few hours at a time, and how willpower was one of the only things that could hold it off, that says a LOT about just how DESPERATE Marcy was to help Bonnie. I mean, you want a really hardcore and messed up image? Imagine if Marceline was actively cutting or RIPPING off the contaminated parts of herself to keep it from spreading and regrowing those parts with her vampiric regeneration?

Then we have ‘Rockstar Girl went after the Blue Tranch’, which I can only imagine translates to ‘Marceline going on a GOLB-DAMMNED WARPATH to hunt down Patience St. Pim’. And let’s remember that A. Patience was currently a super-charged Elemental and B. Marceline would still be fighting off elemental contamination herself, whether the Candification from Bubblegum, the Ice-ification from Patience, or even both.

I mean, when we think about it; ‘Rockstar Girl played some really loud music that the Blue Tranch didn’t like’ quite possibly translates to the most insane battle of the entire show. Like on one side we’ve got Patience St. Pim, seasoned Elemental who could already make Ice King look like an amateur, super-charged with elemental energy making her probably the most powerful Ice Elemental in thousands if not millions of years. And on the other side, we’ve got Marceline, consumed and possibly more than half-crazed with rage, fear and desperation to help Bonnie, going ALL-OUT with her numerous vampire powers, possibly some of her demonic powers, all while fighting off the encroaching elemental contamination.

And if ‘The Blue Tranch begged Rockstar Girl to stop and go away’ is anything to go by, I think we can assume that Marcy utterly WRECKED Patience’s SHIT. As in, Patience may well have ended this fight with an axe in her gut, a claw choking the life out her and Marceline threatening to devour her very SOUL if she didn’t tell her how to help Bonnie.

(Here’s another fun thought: Something that notably separates Patience from the other current elementals of Ooo is that whereas Princess Bubblegum, Flame Princess and Slime Princess are all physical manifestations OF their elements (Gum, Fire and Slime, respectively), while Patience is human. Yet when we see her during the arc, she seems to have lost her human body and assumed fully elemental form as well. Now we could of course assume that this is simply due to the elemental overcharge just like the others. Buuuuttt… what if Patience was FORCED to assume this new form because her human body could no longer SURVIVE after the utter THRASHING she received from Marceline?)

Finally, we of course have the end. Something which seems all too easy to imagine even with Marceline’s toning down of events:

Marcy rushing back to the Candy Kingdom as fast as she can. Even though she’s exhausted from her fight with Patience and the days spent fighting off the elemental contamination. To the point where now she can only barely hold it off and maintain her sanity. Perhaps she wonders if this is what it was like for Simon during their time together…

Even though she knows speeding back this fast is only draining her strength faster, but that doesn’t matter to her. Because what matters right now is the trinket, potion, or something or other clutched in her hand that Patience gave her. Something that Marcy can’t be sure will even work. But she hopes it will. That’s the only thing keeping her going, the only thing holding her together at this point.

A blind, desperate HOPE that this will save Bonnie…

When she finally returns to what was once the Candy Kingdom, Marceline finds the massive tower of gum. Perhaps like Finn and Jake later on, Marceline at first isn’t sure what she’s looking at and thinks Bonnie is at the top. So she flies right to the top in a burst of speed that drains her already dwindling strength even further.

And there Marcy finds Bonnie. Or rather, what Bonnie has BECOME. Perhaps she doesn’t even remember Marcy.

Perhaps for Marcy, this is like losing Simon all over again. Except instead of the father who raised and cared for her over ten years, it’s a woman that Marcy has loved for the better part of a millennium. A woman she was only just able to start loving again after so long. But now, just like Simon… she’s gone.

And this realization does what all the elemental power of Ooo could not.

It breaks Marceline.

Just like that, Marceline doesn’t even try to use the ‘antidote’ Patience gave her. Instead, perhaps Marcy gives Bonnie one last kiss and just… accepts the madness.

Because now, at least they can be together.

"objectively physically attractive but in possession of negative rizz" is one of my favorite character concepts. i think it's so great when there's an absurdly hot person who's just a complete fucking loser. the mood is unsalvageable the moment they open their mouth kind of deal. you get no bitches because you're so sucks.

Let us just appreciate that this person’s dad didn’t know when they would be home and so he couldn’t plan for them to be able to join the family for dinner, but he knew with no doubts that dear sweet Meatloaf staying in that exact position for hours was an absolute in this scenario. Truly, that cat was named well.

one of my favorite posts on tumblr over the course of 5 fucking years.. clearly i need a life

Meatloaf is a reliable cat and did not steal the money for selfish reasons. A rare friend.

I love Meatloaf. :)

Bless Meatloaf

Reblog Money Meatloaf to get surprise $40

Always reblog Meatloaf!

Can we go ahead and stop teaching corvids how to use tools, it's getting spooky

he was sooooo pissed this dipshit was getting those blocks stuck in the pipe

We are assisting to Bird stone age and i want everyone to know how privileged we are to see ir.

do you ever see a person and you are overcome with incredible fondness? and you just think "oh." but not in a romantic or sexual way you are just filled with warmth and it makes you happy, it just does. and you think "i'm so happy you exist. i'm happy you are somewhere out there in the world, doing your thing". it's love but also not entirely

like people are lovely and i feel it in my entire chest like a burning candle that smells like roses and a sunny day

The Original

Wait, actually the original? This post is historic

Trying to get a glass of water but i cant. The water goes up

What do you mean the water goes up

It goes up.

happy birthday to water goes up

Lynda Carter in Wonder Woman (1975), "Wonder Woman Meets Baroness Von Gunther"

Checking to see if the coast is clear before I log onto Tumblr.

One time I was DMing a campaign where the players walked into that tavern every campaign has and one of the patrons was a Mindflayer wearing a very bad human disguise who insisted his name was Johnald Humanman. And they were just like "Oh, okay. Well, that's his business" and didn't interact with Johnald Humanman at all.