today i stubbed my tow very hard against my dressor but didn't feel anything #numb🤘

i spelled dresser wrong are you serious

And toe

wait what

this is so embarrassing

Posts that have 10k to me

hey now

you’re a rock star

get your game on

learning that self depreciation isnt cool and just makes the people around you uncomfortable unironically improved my mental health a lot. like if you just stop saying negative shit about yourself you will genuinely like yourself more and other people wont be repulsed by your attitude and you will have more friends. it's true.

straight people should have to wear “VISITOR” badges when they go to gay bars

WHY are hets so mad at this post I thought you didn’t want to get hit on at gay bars here’s a solution

tucks you in and kisses your forehead then shows you my knuckle tats that say SEEP TITE

CHEERS TO GUY WALTON FOR “OUTING” THE FOSSIL FUEL COMPANIES

From the article:  

Walton has devised his own criteria for named heatwaves in the US, based on duration and extremity, on a one to five scale similar to hurricanes. Heatwave Chevron is classed as a four and is “historic”, Walton said. The meteorologist said he has a list of 20 oil and gas companies – including Exxon and Shell – for upcoming heatwaves and will turn to coal companies if he runs out of names.

OUTSTANDING MOVE

Y'all know what to do. Use Walton's naming system. Make it catch on.

Favorite thing about renaissance faires is that they have fuck all to to with the renaissance. This thang is not about historical anything this is about dressing up like a fairy and watching a joust

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

quick what is everyone doing right now

okay reblogging this again just to say that i love love love reading these,, like it's so incredible how we're all doing such vastly different things at the same time...ik it's an obvious thing but it's also insane to think about.

i said 'explain physics to me like youre in love with me' and after a while of quiet he went 'everything sings'. so i get it now

but those are just my thinkies (cute way of saying thoughts)

penis for your thinkis?

i think not having to work would fix me

They should make food for men

Please I'm so hungry

nevermind

2015-2021 Honda Civic

character design tip: get his fucking tits out

Here's a bunch of anti memes (the best type of memes)