leave the mareep we dont need it

dude, if you pick the username you gotta live up to the username

smh

Honestly, if you see an angel that’s all eyes and wings and wheels of fire, you should be worried. Like, not because it’s going to hurt you or anything, but because scripturally, angels invariably appear to ordinary people in human form. In general, they only show their inhuman true forms to prophets – which means if you’re seeing them like that, they come bearing responsibility.

I woke up today with the phrase “spooky scary seraphim” in my head today, looks like we’re on the same wavelength.

i made a new christmas carol

Last year I thought about making a West African Legend of Zelda AU… The designs are mainly inspired by Ivorian and Senegalese culture.

where is that renaissance painting with those two fellers and a giant fucking random skull on the floor that looks like it was accidentally stretched out in photoshop

THANK YOU

somebody please explain

Someone once told me it’s like that because it was designed to be hung in a stairwell so the skull pops out as you walk past.

…I guess it works but you have to be at a pretty sharp angle

There was a whole trend at one point where artists would include something in their paintings (usually a skull, for whatever reason) that’s super distorted in just the right way so that it looks normal if you hold the painting up to a convex/concave mirror. I have absolutely no idea why. But I think that’s what’s going on here.

In case anyone’s curious, here’s what it looks like when you walk past it irl:

It does have a 3D effect to it! It’s pretty neat, guess it would be even more impressive to people from the 14th century.

honestly, people just looking at the skull are missing the real deal here

You can read any implied text you see in this thing, even the book, that’s how detailed it is. Look at the painting on those letters!

jesus christ you’re just showing off now, Hans!

HANS OH MY GOD

anyway, the skull apparently had some meaning about the transcendence of death, you can only see it clearly when you can’t see the world clearly and vice versa, but man, I’m all about the detail in this guy’s shit

No, I think you’re missing the real deal here

as an art historian, i think this is the best post on tumblr

99% of all murders committed by women in ancient greek plays are completely justified

Clytemnestra: crack? Is it crack you smoke?

it’s always “poor little meow meow” or “evil bastard” or “I could make him worse” what about men who are normal 🙄what about men who pay taxes and are well adjusted individuals and not at all insane

don’t know if I can defend myself against this one

Japanese Sumo robots

this is the funniest gif i’ve seen all week what the fuck is going on

the best part is this isn’t even HALF the relentless bullshit insanity that goes on in robot sumo wrestling, a sport where the contestants are all hyperfast robots with scoop attachments and preprogrammed moves. 

(this one wants to be a beyblade when it grows up)

the idea is to include as many unique moves as you can, to make your shrieking deathbot difficult to counter

or dodging. that works too.

also, some of the speed demons have… unorthodox attachments to fool other bot’s sensors

WIIINGS MOTHERFUCKERRRRRRR

robot sumo is also a sport where spectators may end up taking a small robot to the shins if they aren’t careful.

FLYYYYYYY

I hope you enjoyed our foray into madness!

IT GOT BETTER!!!

Y’all. Looking at professionally made sumo robots is great. You know what’s better though? Looking at extremely UNprofessionally made sumo robots.

Here enjoy.

oh my god please watch this video

“she gave up looking for the robot and sent us a photo of her having a beer. the crowd applauded this act of supreme crappiness.”

one robot is just a kleenex box with a bunch of dildos on it, one does nothing but shake a packet of instant soup, i love humanity so much right now

!!!

lads im goin into cardiac arrest

shoutout to the robot reacting to sound, transfixed at the cheering audience instead of its opponent

No, no it isn’t.

this transcends humor, I have become deceased

Want to project your daddy issues onto Dream SMP characters, but c!Philza sympathizers keep showing you facts, canon and RP etiquette? Tired of endless headcanoning? Want to try something new and unusual?

Well, luckily for you, I got exactly what you need! Let me present to you this dirty British crime boy!

Now with new exciting flavors of abandonment, absence and, or course, ignoring and downplaying your child’s accomplishments and desires! Complete with a plan that involved killing his own son!

“c!Wilbur was a terrible father to c!Fundy”! Project your daddy issues now and get another character that was mean to c!Tommy, for free!

Other sins include: terrorism, emotional manipulation, selfishness and actual hypocrisy!

@alexisreibae

I can’t,,,

I can’t fucking believe this is relevant again.

“Ship means something you want to see happen.” Bitch, no it don’t. This weird-ass modern culture of lobbying show-runners to make your ship canon didn’t emerge until the advent of social media. (And recent social media like twitter, not shit-you-forgot-existed like MySpace.) Shipping and fandom in general have been around much longer, so you can stop acting like “this is the way it has always been uwu” right the fuck now.

Until relatively recently, most fans I’ve known have been perfectly okay with their ships never being canon. I, personally, would be actively offended if certain ships of mine became canon. That is not why I ship them. What I want from canon and what I want from fandom are often entirely different things that only intersect on the margins.That is why fanworks are called “transformative” ffs.

This exactly.

I’m so glad someone said this. A lot of my fav ships I specifically have no desire to see become canon, especially since they’re often in shows that don’t really do much with romance and I PREFER them that way. Shipping and fan fiction are separate things for me.

“What I want from canon and what I want from fandom are often entirely different things”

shipping isn’t always romantic idealization either which is an annoying recent mindset in fandoms, mainly its liking the dynamic of two characters and wanting to explore it in fanwork whether it be for sappy cute reasons or horrible awful unhealthy reasons, whatever is appealing/interesting to you about the pair.

A brief history of physics.

Instead of making up shitty racist headcanons about Miles shoplifting join me in headcanoning him picking up ballet because he thought Gwen being a ballerina was super neat and it would help him in his spiderman job

Spider strength he can’t control + Lifts = Hilarity

Miles, muttering to himself: do not yeet the ballerina. do NOT yeet the ballerina

Jumps. JUMPS.

Miles frantically googling “How high can normal people jump??? How high can ballerinas jump?????? I don’t think I’m supposed to be able to jump straight up to the ceiling and also I keep getting stuck up there please help”

Once Mile’s spider sense pinged lightly about a balcony set and he told the crew master he had a bad feeling about it. The balcony collapsed later. No one was hurt, but now Miles has to go over sets and pronounce them clear of ‘bad feelings’

He’s not even good enough to be in shows yet, but nothing goes out without his seal of approval

honestly I have known so many stage managers and props department people who are Exactly This Superstitious. (And hell, in this case they’re not even wrong he literally has magic danger powers)

I’ve also known a few dancers, and without exception the reaction to finding out this boy can effortlessly hold them in a single arm lift or YEET them dozens of feet in the air (And catch them after!) would be PURE GLEE.

“Okay, Glynda, look, we all know he’s Spiderman. Kid’s terrible at hiding it. But imagine this. None of us tell him we know and none of us tell him how high ballerinas can really throw their partners. And each class we just keep on pretending like we’re impressed with how fast he’s improving but, y'know, he’s still got further to go.”

“Uhuh, yeah, I see that look in your eyes Glynda. You know exactly where I’m going with this. How high do you think Spiderman can throw you?”

“Okay, Glynda, stop giggling, the giggling is creepy. Dessie, please make her stop giggling.”

This is wonderful

One day, in the middle of ballet class, there was a robbery going on a block away, so of course Miles’ gotta rush over there to help out. He grabs his mask, but doesn’t have time to put on his whole suit because he said he was going to the bathroom and it’s be weird if he was gone for so long.

Cue Spider-Man kicking ass in pink ballet shoes and leggings.

This actually increased his popularity severely, and lots of people suddenly gained the interest in ballet; boys too, because if someone as cool as Spider-Man does it, everyone can do it.

When he’s back the instructors don’t comment on the rip in his shirt, the dirt on his shoes, or the smear of paint on his leggings. They make sure to treat the class afterwards. After all, it’s not every day that Spider-Man stops a bunch of bankrobbers and manages to do a high pirouette without crashing through the ceiling this time!

This keeps getting better!

Someone: *Attempts to comment on how weird it is that Miles can throw Glenda high enough she can touch the roof with her palm*

The Stage Manager:

Ballet companies starting rumours that Spiderman doesn’t actually has super powers, he’s just classically trained

You too could scale buildings if you would just practice regularly and focus on your core

[image description: first image is a gif of Stacker Pentecost of Pacific rim saying, according to the subtitle: “You, keep talking.” 

The second image is a screenshot of Michael Scott of The office, with his hand sheltering his mouth from the right so he can whisper to the left. The subtitle says: “[quietly] I’ll kill you.” end of description.]

@madd-nerdd

I feel like nobody talks about this but remember Jay’s “job interview” in the original Men in Black movie? Sure, they play it for comedy, he’s a smartass cop surrounded by all these elite military graduates. But he was also literally the only one in the room smart enough to bring the table over so he had something to write on. And he offers it to the other guys too!

And in the shooting test, on the surface it just seems like a goofy joke when he shoots the little girl cutout in the head, but look at the way he responded to the situation.

The test starts immediately without any warning, we can see that everyone is caught off guard. The other candidates immediately open fire on what they perceive to be threats, but Jay takes a second to assess the situation. He sees he isn’t in any immediate danger, and in a handful of seconds he’s able to scope out several minor details about the targets and hit one with a near-perfect headshot. Jay showed he was an innovative, quick thinker with situational awareness, attention to detail and high-level marksmanship skills, and they never say it outright but I think that’s probably why Zed picked him. (Zed never actually says anything negative about Jay’s performance, just that he has a problem with authority.)

This is highly underrated writing but, then again, this is also the movie where Tommy Lee Jones says “A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals and you know it. Fifteen hundred years ago, everybody knew Earth was the centre of the universe. Five hundred years ago, everybody knew the Earth was flat and 15 minutes ago, you knew humans were alone on this planet. Imagine what you’ll know tomorrow.”

…Is it underrated? I’m pretty sure that despite the light tone, the entire POINT of this scene is about how smart Jay is, which is why he gets chosen over the others despite his lax vibes.

Abso-fucking-lutely Jay was no doubt the best candidate out of the bunch of dudes they had!

I remember even as a early teen, the thing I took out of that interview was that their blind faith in authority, partnered with their lack in interest in creativity made them terrible. It would've killed someone in a field where you had to be personable but also able to control someone potentially violent.

 i tried to be funny and it backfired miserably

not this being my digital foot print😐…… ok if this godforsaken post ever reaches 500k notes i’ll pay tribute n recreate it & hopefully 14yr old me can finally be put to rest alongside mcr

We must get it to 500k

lots of things to unpack with this. the comparison:

and most obviously:

Idk why but villains with standards will always be the funniest thing to me. like you'll get someone who will take absolute pleasure in doing the most vile things but paying their minions less than minimum wage? how dare you insult their honor. there'll be a guy who just loves terrorizing people but if you say something sexist about his sidekick he'll punch you in the throat and step aside with glee to let her pummel you. villains who are like "murder is fine generally but if you're a homophobe then I'll tie you to a boulder and catapult you into the ocean". Idk there's just something innately hilarious about a villain who is very definitively bad, like extremely morally reprehensible, but like there are just certain things that even they won't stoop to, thereby implying that those who do are worse

@optimal-spark I am writing a letter to Hana Barbara right now telling them to cede any future episode writing for this show to you immediately