im sorry this happened in my mind and i had to make it
ok this is insane but like.. the new tumblrinas are more acclimated to the culture than some normal users. i mean it. like every single reddit refugee post has an INSANELY CLOSE like to reblog ratio and there all mutualing each other and sending each other asks and dms. like wtf. how are you better at this.
in all seriousness i think its because we welcomed them with such feral delight. like every single tumblr user individually saw the reddit refugees and were like "ok listen. we love you honey and hope you're feeling good and here are the instructions" and they did SO MUCH MORE THAN WE THOUGHT THEY WOULD!!! AND NOW ALL OF THEM ARE LIKE HAVING SO MUCH FUN AND IM SO HAPPY FOR THEM!!!!
and also not to keep going but i adore how everyone is so so emotional about this. like every single reddit refugee is like "oh my god why are you so nicee i havent felt this happy in years holy fuckkk..." and were all like "its ok!!! im so glad you are having fun you are doing such a good job yknow? youre perfect at this!!" anyways if YOURE a reddit refugee lets be mutuals
We've been let loose after staring at r/Tumblr posts for several years, our time is nigh
Artificial intelligence makes accurate sheep counting.
They should make food for men
Please I'm so hungry
nevermind
Just wanted to let everyone who isn’t aware yet know
-The amount of dms you can send on Twitter per day is now limited unless you have Twitter Blue, I can’t tell if it’s a 24hr period or if it resets at midnight but I ran out of “allowed” dms to my friend at 2:30am last night
-Elon has decided to rebrand Twitter to “X” and “get rid of all the birds”, completely removing the massive brand recognition Twitter has
-Tumblr is apparently trending in technology on Twitter right now
Also Japanese Twitter is having a field day because the rebranding would result in Twitter being called “X Japan”, which happens to be the name of a very famous Japanese rock band that’s been around since the 80s
x japan's founder has already posted a thinly veiled legal warning because apparently not only would it be hilariously stupid to make twitter japan "x japan", but the band owns the trademark, so they can't
Finding out that Elon Musk was forced out as CEO of PayPal in favor of noted vampire Peter Thiel bc Elon Musk was adamant they keep it named "X dot com" instead of Paypal unlocks so much. His space company, his literal child, and now Twitter: it's the world's most inane Rosebud. He actually bought back the URL, like a cherished childhood sled (owning the right to name a website the letter "X")
Some people told him it made more sense to have their banking company have a indicative name instead of generically being called "X" with vague allusions to being The Site For Everything, and he'll prove those fools WRONG by getting the same things yelled at him over a different website's name twenty years later
week 4 of kittenhood is the peak. their ears haven’t even straightened out and they have triangle tails. unbelievable.
They’re about to break so many laws it’s not even funny, I can feel it in my bones
It’s about PayPal. This is all about fucking PayPal
He’s still pissed they fired him. He’s still pissed they didn’t like his idea of calling PayPal X
20 years and he has not learned a single thing. He’s still throwing a tantrum about people not liking his bad name suggestion decades ago
@staff openly tagging face selfies of trans women as sexual content after you already lost ONE lawsuit over queerphobic moderation is quite a fucking move
Lawsuit (linked here) required tumblr to:
- Train all employees (including subcontractors) on New York City Human Rights Law and unconscious bias, with a focus on sexual orientation and gender identity
- Have humans review user appeals on adult content. Previously they only had humans review post-removal appeals
- Revise the language used in appeal process for users
- Search random sample of previously filed appeals for terms involving sexual orientation and gender identity to identify bias and retrain AI image classifier
- Hire an expert in image classification to remove algorithmic bias around sexual orientation and gender identity and train employees on addressing image classification bias.
- Have an image classification expert complete a evaluation on bias in moderation and steps taken to address it.
- Search filed appeals after new review process in place for terms involving sexual orientation and gender identity to identify bias. Monthly reports of bias will be sent to New York City's Commission on Human Rights for 18 months.
Would be very interested to see these reports on bias as clearly it has not worked!
They also terminated someone's blog that she had for ten years for disputing the report by walking through all the community guidelines that she did not break. They claimed it was a mistake and would be unflagged and instead
1. Her account was terminated
2. The post remains flagged
This isn't a glitch. This isn't a coincidence. This is targeted harrassment.
Where is her award? She stayed in character for that whole thing!
She slipped a tiny bit near the end, but if you didn't know what was going on you wouldn't have caught it. 10/10 high quality spousal shenanigans
not me realizing that with tumblr moving the icons to the side, it eliminates xkit, which was situated at the top. what a scumbag move
xkit rewritten, which should be used instead of the shambling corpse of old xkit, lives in the addon bar of your browser! And it handled the new layout like a champ, removing all of the garbage (if configured to do so). https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/xkit-rewritten/ https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/xkit-rewritten/ehgbadgnkmeeldglkmnplolneidgpbcm
my friend asked me to pretend to be her boyfriend because her parents are homophobic af but they ended up hating me so much that they were glad when she said she was gay task failed successfully
okay so
- be a goth. conservative christian parents don't approve of goth men. show up to their house wearing all kinds of satanic symbols if you can
- know more about religion than the parents. they'll try to introduce you to christianity because you don't exactly look like a christian but your dad's an ex priest and has a phd in theology so *cracks knuckles* you'll correct them on every little mistake they make
- call your fake girlfriend every annoying petname under the sun. i'm talking about babu, shmoopie, snuffleupagus. when you run out of annoying english terms of endearment call her shit like "my liver" or "my little cabbage" (actual greek terms of endearments but the parents won't know this they'll just think you're annoying :3)
- to continue this, talk to your fake girlfriend in the most high pitched annoying voice possible but talk in your regular voice to everyone else
stare at her older brother's ass for just a little too long- have an annoying laugh. think of sybil fawlty but a stereotypical villain playing a church organ in his castle
- let them quote bible verses to you. then ask "so when were those two destroyed for sodomy?". it's very funny to do this when judas kisses jesus, and it's even funnier when you've just corrected them over a minor mistake in church history
- ask WHY abraham was begging for sodom. it doesn't make sense to you why a good christian man would go and beg for tha-
- be over possessive of your fake gf (dont really do this, it's just an act)
go and fuck her brother in an alleyway.the parents won't know about this so it's an optional step- use words no one knows the meaning of. do this without realising because you always talk like that
- just be yourself! that's enough on its own to make them despise you tbh
yes
i kissed him on the lips infront of his parents and claimed it was the usual greek greeting between men is that enough for you
Are you…. Are you secretly dating her brother OP?
yes
I wonder why
Show up again to admit to dating the brother, but dress like a typical suburbanite and act like you've never met the parents before. Absolute power move.
asdgfgsjfh im totally doing this
want an update?
ofc you do
but i'm too tired to write all of what happened down right now so instead try to imagine the most awkward situation you've ever been in.
now multiply the awkwardness by 100
first of all i'm just gonna show the difference in what i was wearing
an example of what i would wear as my friend's fake bf:
and as my boyfriend's actual bf:
when my bf and i showed up his dad did such a double take
sooo yeah my bf told his parents he's gay, they looked surprised but told him it was fine... then they shared a look of pure horror (seriously, it was like they had just found out they're in the matrix) and said
"and uh. why is...he here?"
i went and introduced myself like we had never met before and said i was their son's boyfriend
:3
i've never seen two people look more angry before but they weren't gonna say anything because they had other family members over
the family members who had never met me before and therefore knew nothing about the fake relationship thing started asking me what faith i am. i said i was raised protestant, though i'm not very religious now, but that's something i want to change. i had never mentioned anything about being a protestant before and i had said several times that my family was greek orthodox but gaslight gatekeep girlboss
aaaand then the awkwardness began. those were probably the most awkward minutes of my life (we didn't stay for long because i thought the dad was gonna hit me [he probably was. i saw him clenching his fists several times]) and i don't think anyone has ever looked at me with such murderous intent as my bf's parents
update two electric boogaloo ig
i have a girlfriend now🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️
Be the fucking chaos you want to see in the world.
i know its the mets, but this is the coolest shit i’ve ever seen a human being do
futureblackpolitician
Wtf????
Smoove with it too
meqabitch
This is the kind of shit you see in anime that shows that a certain character is stronger than other characters.
“Pathetic. You can’t even hold the bat you dare step to the plate? Have you no respect for the sport?”
reminds me of this gif
Baseball players are to be feared
thenamesdiondra
Reblogging for the last one
^Same for me
They just kept getting progressively more “woah”
much woah
lord-blongus
Oh my god this is a lucky universe
every time this post comes around, my favorite part is the “I know it’s the Mets” qualifier at the beginning lmao like how baseball that this zillion note posts starts with “sorry for putting this hellteam on your dash, bUT”
Y’all have no idea how hard I was trying not to laugh in class at that poor bird
funnierabbit75
They…they just blew up a fucking bird…
Ball’s dead. Bird’s dead. I’m dead
World Heritage Post
personally my favorite thing about Mr. Bird Evaporator is this imagine being the poor fool tryna rob this man’s house only to be instantly transported to the same dimension as that bird
Orange cats need to be named ‘just some guy’-esque names. I see orange cats that are named Patrick or Dave or Bob and I’m like “yeah, exactly”. My orange cat is named Tommy even though she’s a girl because she’s truly a Tommy.
Henry Croutons…..
trying not to bawl in class over henry croutons
Enjoy a drink on one of my special coasters. Yea I custom made them (the coasters) to be so light the drinks condensation makes em stick to the bottom of your glass, but still heavy enough that when it (the coaster) finally clatters to the ground it's loud as fuck and shatters your nerves and makes you spill your drink everywhere. Why am I doing this? Well, it's a sex thing for me