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@funnylookingmermaid

Em || 19 || VA
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funnylookingmermaid
vanish-cherry
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phoebe-does

there is never going to be a ‘too old to start *blank*’ that doesn’t exist, we only peak when we’re young because we let ourselves and convince ourselves that our best lives are lived while young. Fuck that! start degrees in your 30s, take art classes in your 50s. I started my sport late and now play with people who have played their whole lives and am beating them, i represent my state in my sport and though i had to learn a lot that came naturally to kids playing their whole lives, i worked harder than them because of it. Get into music, fitness, eating healthy, science, vet care, we don’t stop growing at a certain age, expand yourself, expand what you know and who you are and do it often!

funnylookingmermaid
this-wildd-life

there’s a lot of unspoken pressure to keep liking the things you used to like and to keep dressing the way you’ve always dressed and to never question what you believe in and basically “be yourself” has slowly morphed into “be what everyone knows you as” but trust me when i say if you just give it up and simply make decisions and take actions based purely on what would make you happy, you’ll gain a very comforting sense of self peace   

funnylookingmermaid
spongebobssquarepants

Green Day | Boulevard of broken dreams

Oasis | wonderwall

Travis | Writing to reach you

Aerosmith | Dream on

mash up.

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tiger-in-the-flightdeck
image
Well, that was the greatest thing I’ve ever filled my ears with.

IT’S BACK ON HERE.

funnylookingmermaid
wordsnquotes
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culturenlifestyle

Enchanting Bookworm Inspired Digital Illustrations by Simini Blocker

NYC based illustrator Simini Blocker understands the enchanting world bookworms revel in. From Hogwarts to Neverland or King’s Landing, Blocker captures the spellbinding imaginative realms literature has introduced to us with vibrant colours, gorgeous brushstrokes and fitting quotes from our favourite authors. You can find her gorgeous illustrations on Society6 and Etsy.

View similar posts here!

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Source: culturenlifestyle.com
funnylookingmermaid
isnt

These people went from lifting chips to pulling off some action movie shit

This is the most Chaotic Neutral thing I’ve ever seen.

funnylookingmermaid
gaymeplan-blog

I do not understand this “male privilege" bullshit.

What. Fucking. Privileges. Do. Men. Have.???????

Name them. I swear, I challenge you to name these “male privileges" and be able to prove them. 

Come on, I fucking dare you. 

Name them!

Oh boy. Well, as a man, I’ll tell you my male privilege.

  1. My odds of being hired for a job, when competing against female applicants, are probably skewed in my favor. The more prestigious the job, the larger the odds are skewed.
  2. I can be confident in the fact that my co-workers won’t think that I was hired/promoted because of my sex - despite the fact that it’s probably true.
  3. If I ever am promoted when a woman of my peers is better suited for the job, it is because of my sex.
  4. If i ever fail at my job or career, it won’t be seen as a blacklist against my sex’s capabilities.
  5. I am far less likely to face sexual harassment than my female peers.
  6. If I do the same task as a woman, and if the measurement is at all subjective, chances are people will think I did a better job.
  7. If I am a teen or an adult, and I stay out of prison, my odds of getting raped are relatively low.
  8. On average, I’m taught that walking alone after dark by myself is less than dangerous than it is for my female peers.
  9. If I choose not to have children, my masculinity will not be questioned.
  10. If I do have children but I do not provide primary care for them, my masculinity will not be questioned.
  11. If I have children and I do care for them, I’ll be praised even if my care is only marginally competent.
  12. If I have children and a career, no one will think I’m selfish for not staying at home.
  13. If I seek political office, my relationship with my children or who I deem to take care of them will more often not be scrutinized by the press.
  14. My elected representatives are mostly people of my own sex. The more prestigious the position, the more this is true.
  15. When i seek out “the person in charge", it is likely that they will be someone of my own sex. The higher the position, the more often this is true.
  16. As a child, chances are I am encouraged to be more active and outgoing than my sisters.
  17. As a child, I could choose from an almost infinite variety of children’s media featuring positive, active, non-stereotyped heroes of my own sex. I never had to look for it; male protagonists were (and are) the default.
  18. As a child, chances are I got more teacher attention than girls who raised their hands just as often.
  19. If my day, week or year is going badly, I need not ask of each negative episode or situation whether or not it has sexist overtones. (Nobody’s going to ask if I’m upset because I’m menstruating.)
  20. I can turn on the television or glance at the front page of the newspaper and see people of my own sex widely represented.
  21. If I’m careless with my financial affairs it won’t be attributed to my sex.
  22. If I’m careless with my driving it won’t be attributed to my sex.
  23. I can speak in public to a large group without putting my sex on trial.
  24. Even if I sleep with a lot of women, there is little to no chance that I will be seriously labeled a “slut,” nor is there any male counterpart to “slut-bashing.”
  25. I do not have to worry about the message my wardrobe sends about my sexual availability.
  26. My clothing is typically less expensive and better-constructed than women’s clothing for the same social status. While I have fewer options, my clothes will probably fit better than a woman’s without tailoring.
  27. The grooming regimen expected of me is relatively cheap and consumes little time.
  28. If I buy a new car, chances are I’ll be offered a better price than a woman buying the same car. The same goes for other expensive merchandise.
  29. If I’m not conventionally attractive, the disadvantages are relatively small and easy to ignore.
  30. I can be loud with no fear of being called a shrew. I can be aggressive with no fear of being called a bitch.
  31. I can ask for legal protection from violence that happens mostly to men without being seen as a selfish special interest, since that kind of violence is called “crime” and is a general social concern. (Violence that happens mostly to women is usually called “domestic violence” or “acquaintance rape,” and is seen as a special interest issue.)
  32. I can be confident that the ordinary language of day-to-day existence will always include my sex. “All men are created equal,” mailman, chairman, freshman, he.
  33. My ability to make important decisions and my capability in general will never be questioned depending on what time of the month it is.
  34. I will never be expected to change my name upon marriage or questioned if I don’t change my name.
  35. The decision to hire me will not be based on assumptions about whether or not I might choose to have a family sometime soon.
  36. Every major religion in the world is led primarily by people of my own sex. Even God, in most major religions, is pictured as male.
  37. Most major religions argue that I should be the head of my household, while my wife and children should be subservient to me.
  38. If I have a wife or live-in girlfriend, chances are we’ll divide up household chores so that she does most of the labor, and in particular the most repetitive and unrewarding tasks.
  39. If I have children with my girlfriend or wife, I can expect her to do most of the basic childcare such as changing diapers and feeding.
  40. If I have children with my wife or girlfriend, and it turns out that one of us needs to make career sacrifices to raise the kids, chances are we’ll both assume the career sacrificed should be hers.
  41. Assuming I am heterosexual, magazines, billboards, television, movies, pornography, and virtually all of media is filled with images of scantily-clad women intended to appeal to me sexually. Such images of men exist, but are rarer.
  42. In general, I am under much less pressure to be thin than my female counterparts are. If I am over-weight, I probably suffer fewer social and economic consequences for being fat than over-weight women do.
  43.  If I am heterosexual, it’s incredibly unlikely that I’ll ever be beaten up by a spouse or lover.
  44. Complete strangers generally do not walk up to me on the street and tell me to “smile.”
  45. Sexual harassment on the street virtually never happens to me. I do not need to plot my movements through public space in order to avoid being sexually harassed, or to mitigate sexual harassment.
  46. On average, I am not interrupted by women as often as women are interrupted by men.
  47. On average, I will have the privilege of not knowing about my male privilege.

And lastly, I am taken as a more credible feminist than my female peers, despite the fact that the feminist movement is not liberating to my sex.

This is male privilege.

THIS. THIS IS HOW YOU BE A MALE FEMINIST. 

funnylookingmermaid
stilesinwonderland
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fatherofthebride

the assassination of franz ferdinand was actually the most hilariously botched assassination attempt of all time though like i can’t even explain to you how badly it went i mean there were six guys and the first one chickened out and the second one forgot to factor in the delay on a hand grenade so it exploded like three cars past the archduke’s so the guy took a cyanide pill and threw himself into a river, but the cyanide was expired and the river was six inches deep so the police just pulled him out and took him off to jail and then everyone else basically gave up and headed home, and then the driver of the archduke took a wrong turn and the car stalled next to the last of the six guys, and he was just like “what a crazy random happenstance” and started world war one

You forgot to mention that the last guy only happened to kill Franz because he had just come out of the sandwich shop where the car stopped

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omorka

It is obvious to even the most casual observer that this particular event has been meddled with by at least two groups of time travelers trying to change history.  Please, if you invent a time machine, leave the assassination of Ferdinand alone; the space-time continuum there is already showing obvious cracks from the strain.

the story of how ww1 was started by a bunch of incompetent children is my fave historical fact of all time - (and I do mean children, since all 5 of the initially arrested assassination conspirators were minors under austrian law at the time) 

and the fact that some of them initially banded together to commit, like, just any unspecified act of terrorism,not necessarily assassinate the archduke, as a sort of early 20th century assassination fandom, because they idolized a guy from their town who had previously tried to kill a high ranking bosnian official, meaning terrorism was just the major teen fad of their time

but my absolute fave little factoid that really shows these were just completely regular 19 year old boys in every way is that all of them took a virginity pledge so nothing would distract them in their revolutionary mission

except gavrilo princip had a gf called jelena, and on the night before the assassination he decided he really didn’t want to die a virgin, so he arranged a rendez-vous with jelena in a park and tried to explain that it’s vitally important that they have sex right then, but he couldn’t tell her why because he didn’t want to implicate her in the assassination

so obviously with it being 1914 she says no, he goes home, then goes on to start ww1 in the morning, but what makes the story for me is that when they later interviewed jelena about gavrilo and the assassination, after telling the story about them meeting in the park she said the following (i’m paraphrasing slightly)

‘i’m not surprised. gavrilo was so pissed that night (about them not having sex) he was ready to shoot god, let alone an emperor ’

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gehayi

The story with Jelena is brilliant. Here it is in Arms: The Culture and Credo of the Gun:

Let us absolve the gun and its designer and call to the stand Jelena Milisic, Princip’s girlfriend. Milisic spent the evening of June 27 with Princip in a city park, where she defended her virtue against repeated importunities.
“A man can suffer terrible complications if he doesn’t release the pressure,” said he.
“That is nonsense,” said Jelena. “And were it not, I am confident you could take the matter in hand.”

I mean, she not only told him “no, we are not fucking,” but she did it with a pun.

funnylookingmermaid
ssweetimperfiction98
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stephenhawqueen

the US is unreal like girls cant wear shorts to school, you can literally lose your job for being gay, and unarmed black children are brutally murdered on the regular but old white ppl r still like “what a beautiful country. i can freely carry a gun for no reason and some of our mountains look like presidents. god bless”

THIS IS LITERALLY IT. THIS IS WHAT ITS LIKE

funnylookingmermaid
milesjai-deactivated20190613

Why do Americans put the month first. It just makes no sense.

We put the month first because in conversation we say, “July 1st, 2015.” Because it’s quicker than “The first of July, 2015.”

“Tomorrow is May 29th” not “Tomorrow is the 29th of May.” That is why we write it 5/29/15 and not 29/5/15. Because we go by how we phrase it in conversation rather than in sequence because it converts better between numbers and language when written in the former. We also use the month first because that’s how calendars are organized. You have one year and one calendar so the year is a constant and can go in the back. However, calendars aren’t organized my days, but rather by months. You flip to the months first and then find the day. So…. p>

While on this topic, we also use Fahrenheit and not Celsius because a 0-100 scale of measuring temperature makes a lot more sense to a human. We know that 0 is really fucking cold and 100 is really fucking hot, which makes sense. Celsius, however, is just about how water responds to temperature, and makes no sense when applied to humans. Fahrenheit is for people, Celsius is for water. And I am a people not a water.

oh

I find this very funny cause you say that but your independence day is not called July 4th, its called the 4th of July.

What I find funny is that our armies were about half the size of the British army and yet we were still able to crush your crumby asses, declare independence and pour your tea in the ocean.

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funnylookingmermaid
slowmotionbabyy
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teatrical

i have a friend whos gay and one day we asked him what was like to have “the conversation” with his parents, like telling them he was gay and he just said he never told them, and then he said “my brother who’s straight never went to my parents to told them ‘hey i’m straight’ so why should i have to do it?” and he arrived home with his boyfriend and no one made a big deal out of it and i think that’s the way it should be everywhere