*Yells*

Joel is practicing his intimidation skills. Tess is not impressed.

They've been running around non-stop for 90 minutes now

Bitch

They sold their soul for that talent

For people who don't know who the Chevalier St George was:

- he was the son of a french aristocrat and an enslaved Senegalese woman called Nanon

- he actually had a relationship with his mother, which was pretty usual for children in his situation. I haven't been able to establish whether she was later freed or not, but I think she was because she left a will, suggesting she owned property

- his father legally wasn't allowed to make him his heir because of racist laws at the time, but he acknoledged him as his son and gave him a rich person's education and opportunities

- he was one of, if not the, greatest violinists of his generation, played first violin for the Paris opera and was violin teacher to the queen before the revolution

- he was in line to be composer and director of the opera but a famous dancer who was pissed off he didn't want a relationship with her started a petition to get his appointment blocked

- he knew Haydn and commissioned the Paris Symphonies from him

- Mozart's father tried to make him go and see St George perform because he thought it would be good for his musical education but Mozart was (it is speculated) jealous of there being another young music prodigy, and refused to go

- he was ridiculously handsome . Look at this, my guy is pulling off a powdered wig, do you know how hard it is to look good in a powdered wig?!

- he was considered one of the greatest duelists and swordsmen in france

- he fought a duel with the Chevalier D'eon, who at the time was living as a woman (we have no idea if D'eon was afab or amab but they made their reputation as a man and then later switched to presenting as a woman)

- he wrote incredible concertos and unbelievably terrible operas. The longest any of his opera's ever ran before being shut down was a couple of weeks. Some one lasted 1 night. He kept writing them.

- he joined the revolutionaries to otherthrow the king because they (falsely) promised to abolish slavery and emancipate all enslaved people

- he was a fantastically successful soldier and lead the first all black regiment in europe, which came to be known as the regiment st George in his honour

He's legitimately one of the most interesting figures in french history, and certainly one of the most romantic, and I'm so glad he might finally be getting the recognition he deserves!

a 24 minute video, in which Althea Talbot-Howard discusses the life and work of the Chevalier de Saint-Georges with Sarah Jeffery. including a performance of the 1st movement of his Sonata for harp and obbligato flute (arranged for piano and alto recorder)

"He's Mr. March! He's objectively very hot, but he's also just so, so good to everyone around him. A wholesome hunk."

"Have you met the man? He’d be up for some truly kinky shit and then provide the best aftercare possible. I also refuse to think he isn’t both 1) the most attentive partner ever and 2) Hung. He is so incredibly fuckable to me you don’t even know"

same here, vote ricky matsui please and thank you

"She's a wizard with a blunt force weapon. She routinely cries but gets shit done. I love her so much"

"pirate dyke"

Fuck it I'm gonna commit voter fraud. followers. you know nothing about this tournament. but vote Esther Sinclair

this is the best sentence ever typed

me after the socialist revolution when yaoi is outlawed

Actually, as a cis woman who is a fujoshi, I plan on being the next communist dictator, so get fucked, OP.

A second best sentence has hit the twin towers

eleventh plague. emails. 

Pharoah, I hope this email finds you letting my people go

as per my last plague,

This aerial footage shows the beauty and majesty of the Weelaunee Forest in Atlanta, Georgia and the destruction that Brent Scarborough Company is inflicting upon it at the behest of the same politicians who sent the police to murder Tortuguita and charge the other activists defending the forest with "terrorism." Rather than addressing the ecological or economic crises that threaten our communities, they aim to suppress all protest by means of brute force.

Brent Scarborough Company is working for Brasfield and Gorrie, insured by Scottsdale Insurance Company. This butchery is funded by an array of corporate donors whose names can be found online.

To learn more:

http://defendtheatlantaforest.org/

#StopCopCity

"That's the Pizza Tower tutorial song." "No, it's a traditional Italian folk song." No, it's literally a 140-year-old meme – "Funiculì, Funiculà" was written in 1880, as a joke, to commemorate the opening of a tourist attraction at Mount Vesuvius. (The tourist attraction was later destroyed by a volcanic eruption.) Go ahead and rewrite the lyrics to be about sticking your dick in a pizza – there is nothing you can do with this song that's more ridiculous than its original context.

#oh my god #how can it be funnier in the original context than #the pizza on my cock one (via @profiction-monika)

The original Neapolitan lyrics are about a young man inviting his girlfriend to come ride a cable-car up the side of a mountain. And up, and down, and up, and down, and up, and down, and... well, it's not just about the cable-car, is what I mean to say.

"Haha, funny pizza tower joke, David. Let's learn what guiseppe's all about. Hey wiki, who's Guiseppe Turco?"

"Do you mean Peppino Turco?"

"No, I mean- wh- Oh This Was Not A Joke That David Was Pulling On Us"

There's genuinely nothing I could make up about this song that's sillier than its real history. Very Serious Composers have on multiple unconnected occasions mistaken this advertising-jingle-slash-dick-joke for a traditional Neapolitan folk song and incorporated it into their Very Serious Compositions. Richard Strauss actually got sued over it.

well, damn.

There is something very, very right about getting this news from the Destiel meme.

A thing that bothers me about wizard schools in popular media – outside of the magic-grade-school stuff, anyway – is that they're typically depicted as being basically magic universities, but their actual curricula and pedagogical approaches look much more like those of a technical institution. Like, buddy, that's not a wizard university, that's a wizard trade school. You can't just slap university student culture on top of trade school pedagogy. It doesn't work like that – the one emerges from the other!

"Well ACTUALLY wizards are" wizards are made up. They can be analogous to whatever real-world class or vocation the author wants. Wizard-school-as-university and wizard-school-as-technical-institute are both perfectly fine; what I am grumping about is wizard-school media that doesn't seem to have a clear picture of how different sorts of educational institutions actually operate.

Okay but now I really want to know what a Wizard technician would look like. Would he wear magical overalls with all kinds of reagents and magic tools sticking out of his numerous pockets?

A guy like that walks into your tower with a toothpick in his mouth, takes one look at your summoning circle and goes

“I see yer problem. You used chalk B12 instead of S3. B12 is only for transmutation circles. Gimme a sec I think I have a piece somewhere here.”

He fixes your circle, test summons an imp and goes.

“There ya go. Fit as a fiddle.”

“It’s the chalk.”

“The chalk? I always use that chalk, it’s never been a problem.”

“Ah - yes. This stuff will work just fine for most circles, but, uh - here, take a look with my loupe. You see the off-color flecks? Can’t hardly see them with the naked eye, but those are impurities. Silicates, might even be some iron in here, to be honest. Usually won’t cause a problem, but - you said you hadn’t tried this particular summons before?”

“First time trying a 5th level, yeah.”

“Those silicates will make your scribing a little fuzzy when viewed from the astral plane. You see, for example, these three fine lines here? With this chalk, on the astral that looks like one thick line with fuzzy edges. They can’t tell exactly what you want, and they’re picky lil’ critters so they just won’t do anything in response.”

“Really? Oh. I always thought the expensive chalk was just fancy to be fancy.”

“Making pure chalk is difficult, you need a dedicated production line or dust gets in the finished product. To be honest, you don’t need to bother with it for most things, but 5th and up, 5th level and up, it actually is necessary. Anything with lines within about two millimeters of each other.”

“So I need to start over?”

“Unfortunately yes. You’ll have to erase all this, but with some good chalk it should work just fine. Next new moon your summons should go off without a hitch.”

“Dang. At least it’s not my sigils, I was worried it was my sigils.”

“Nah Your sigils look good. Even and balanced. You know what you’re doing, it’s just an equipment problem.”

“Thanks for the help, sorry to make you come all the way out here.”

“No problem! It’s my job.”

via

Fondly remembering the time that a cat owner casually entered their calico Maine Coon in a cat fancier’s competition and the judges lost their minds because the cat was 1) male and 2) able to bear children

Anyway here’s Dawntreader Texas Calboy as a silly lil kitten

Here’s an excerpt from one of the articles about the drama his entry caused among the Cat Fanciers that I thought was very earnest and sweet <3

And also some of Calboy’s children!

@pangur-and-grim

He is fearfully and wonderfully made!

ALT

I was about to say he would technically be an intersex king (not because I dislike the concept of trans cats, just bc intersex rep is sorely needed too) but I did some more reading on this icon and actually found the article OP referenced.

ALT

He’s not your usual male calico kitty as it turns out. That’s already cool and rare, but he’s even cooler and rarer than that!

ALT

ALT

Calboy is a chimera!! Which is really fucking cool of you ask me. The chances of having a male calico this way are slim to none, but the mad lad still exists! What an icon. I would die for Calboy.

Everyone in the tags of this post @ cat show judges

Originally I was looking for an adult picture of Calboy

(He’s so pretty 🥰)

But I also found a source for the article screenshotted above! And folks it’s WILD. It’s an incredibly interesting read if you happen to love hearing about niche hobby drama. It’s also just a fantastically written article!

The parts I find the most interesting are about how conservative the cat fanciers association is. This isn’t even all of the parts that talk about that.

People are so mad about this cat spefically because he has female colors. An animal who couldn’t choose how it was born. This is happening in Texas by the way. Hm. I wonder how they treat trans people over there?

Reblogging again for this crucial addition

I feel like both of these could be album covers.

“This dog loves his veggies so much that he stole a cabbage from his neighbour’s garden“

(via)

look at this…

I’m howling

this is the equivalent of making a movie about a succubus and calling it SUCC

It’s actually slightly worse than that, because “chupa” isn’t just the verb “suck” – that would be “chupar”. “Chupa” is a verb inflection that reads one of two ways: when paired with a subject, it’s indicative (i.e., it describes an action being performed by its subject; hence, “chupacabra” = “goat-sucker”), but without an explicit subject, it becomes imperative. This film’s title is commanding you to suck.

If as a novice game designer you understand nothing else, please understand that writing for a rules-light system doesn't mean you don't need to know basic statistics. I've seen multiple Apocalypse Engine titles whose authors are clearly under the impression that every possible sum of 2d6 is equally probable. I've encountered at least one that included sum-of-2d6 based lookup tables with twelve entries.

wait is every sum not equally probable isn’t that the whole point of dice <-doesn’t understand statistics but is now confused

Here's a simple visual illustration.

There are 36 possible ways two rolls of a six-sider can come up:

(1,1) (1, 2) (1, 3) (1, 4) (1, 5) (1, 6) (2,1) (2, 2) (2, 3) (2, 4) (2, 5) (2, 6) (3,1) (3, 2) (3, 3) (3, 4) (3, 5) (3, 6) (4,1) (4, 2) (4, 3) (4, 4) (4, 5) (4, 6) (5,1) (5, 2) (5, 3) (5, 4) (5, 5) (5, 6) (6,1) (6, 2) (6, 3) (6, 4) (6, 5) (6, 6)

Assuming that you're using fairly balanced d6s, all 36 of these results are equally probable. (You'll have to take my word for this part – proving that the distinct compounds of equally probable events are also equally probable is beyond the scope of this post!)

Now here's the illustrative part.

Above, the pairs are sorted by whatever the first die rolled: all of the pairs that begin with a 1 are in the first row, all of the pairs that begin with a 2 are in the second row, and so forth.

What happens if we sort them by their sums instead?

(1, 1) = 2 (1, 2) (2, 1) = 3 (1, 3) (2, 2) (3, 1) = 4 (1, 4) (2, 3) (3, 2) (4, 1) = 5 (1, 5) (2, 4) (3, 3) (4, 2) (5, 1) = 6 (1, 6) (2, 5) (3, 4) (4, 3) (5, 2) (6, 1) = 7 (2, 6) (3, 5) (4, 4) (5, 3) (6, 2) = 8 (3, 6) (4, 5) (5, 4) (6, 3) = 9 (4, 6) (5, 5) (6, 4) = 10 (5, 6) (6, 5) = 11 (6, 6) = 12

See what's happening there? When sorted by their sums, those 36 equally probable results end up in eleven distinct buckets, and some of those buckets have more results in them than others.

To put it another way, you're six times as likely to roll a 7 as you are to roll a 2 because there are six times as many ways to roll a 7 than there are to roll a 2.

This V-shaped distribution holds true for all sums of two identical dice, with the peak at exactly (number of sides + 1).

(This is the central statistical trick behind the Apocalypse Engine, incidentally. Rolling flat nothing feels like it ought to be risky, but in fact you'll get a 7+ about three times in five, with 7 itself being particularly common. Under these conditions, rolling exactly 7 feels like you just barely made it, but it was in fact the single most likely outcome!)

three years and nothing has changed 😌

my grandparents have to lock their car doors when they go to sunday mass because people have been breaking in to unlocked cars and leaving entire piles of zucchini

i feel like i should’ve added more context when i posted this. my grandparents live in a rural area where farmers and casual gardeners alike are, at this point in the year, suddenly being hit with unexpectedly abundant zucchini crops. there aren’t just some random vandals leaving zucchinis in people’s cars for the hell of it, this is the work of some very exasperated, probably very elderly, folks who have more zucchini than they know what to do with

Yep. You can also expect to find a bag of zucchini on your porch.

My grandfather once found his neighbor stealing his tomatoes out of his garden at three in the morning. Red-handed, with a basket of the nearly-ripened ones.  He thought he was going to find gophers or something, but no, here’s Henry, taking his tomatoes. The best ones.

There was a long pause between them.

My grandfather (allegedly) said, “Henry… it’s OK.  You can take some tomatoes if you want them.”

Henry sighed in relief.

“But,” my grandfather said, “you have to take two zucchini for every tomato.”

There was another long silence.  “That’s a harsh bargain, John,” said Henry.  “But I accept.  I’ll tell Joe up the street, too.”

My grandfather said, “Tell Joe he needs to take three.”

a friend of my dad’s came by in the middle of the night, he seemed very nervous when my dad answered the door. he wouldn’t come inside but he leaned in and whispered to my dad in spanish, “i have some fresh grapes for you.” and then this happened:

the melon was a special bonus.

@theshitpostcalligrapher r…reblog… reblog to give…

grape

OH MY GOD I FORGOT ABOUT THIS POST

it all comes backto gib grap i guess