I keep thinking about this at work and making myself sick trying not to laugh

this mordecai amd rigby ass song 😭😭

I’m thinking about how my grandma had this guy who was super into her, enlisted in the army and sent her pictures of himself laying on his bunk staring at her picture moodily. She was not into him in the slightest. But it’s the funniest fucking picture of all time. Teenagers do not change. He’s someone’s Pappaw now. That’s crazy to me. He probably thinks of my grandmother as the foxy one that got away.

The fact that she kept it for 58 years is even funnier. I was like “Who the hell is this?” and she let out an exasperated sigh and was like “That was [NAME]. He was in love with me.” Feelings very much not reciprocated for soldier boy.

I think this incident is so funny to me because it reminded me of girls my age screenshotting cringy conversations with horrible horny men and posting them in the group chat for everyone to see. I think of all those extremely horny and verbose historical love letters in museums dating back as long as humans have been able to write. I wonder if there was a caveman who made cave art to impress a possible mate but it was so bad she made a point of visiting the cave every year to show her friends and laugh at it.

windbreaker too cool of a name for something thats just a stupid jacket all like yeah im wearing some jeans a tshirt fila shoes and the cloth that tears the winds asunder

the most "fucking, fair enough i guess" response ive ever gotten to something i said was in the ER

me: hi, i need a rabies shot triage nurse: oh? why's that? me: i got bitten by a bat triage nurse: what were you doing that you got bitten by a bat at 3 in the morning? me: removing a bat from my bedroom

im given to understand that it generally takes a lot to leave ER staff speechless, but it sure was a good 5 seconds before she thought of anything to say to that

#prev u say sol but u see. i have reblogged this post at least 3 times at different points in the past#bC PEOPLE KEEP SENDING IT TO ME!!!#i will reblog as usual.

@solipseismic i am FASCINATED to discover that you are a real person and not a fictional character because this has been tagged about you often enough that i assumed it was a fandom thing. is your story any more interesting than mine or did it just make a disproportionately massive impression on your fiend group?

i had to take a moment to compose myself this (fandom thing) is possibly the funniest thing anyone's ever said about me. probably not more interesting but like 200% more stupid and so accordingly has made a bit of an impression on most of the people who know me

>be me (freshman living in college dorm)

>go for a walk in the beautiful spring weather

>there is a bat on the sidewalk in the middle of the day

>sidebar to note that at this point in life my bat knowledge solely consists of "usually flying" and "only comes out at night"

>how terrible this bat must be disoriented by the bright sunlight (middle of the day) and fell from where it was ........................... roosting (on the sidewalk)

>if i put this bat in a box with some water and then bring it back out at night maybe it will have recovered enough from the. sun

>text my roommate asking him to put a towel in a box

>i pick up the bat (on the sidewalk) (middle of the day) (no gloves)

>one bat in a box later i log onto tumblr dot com and post something along the lines of: does anyone know what to do in case of accidental bat acquisition

>mutual from area with many bats: you need to get rabies shots IMMEDIATELY

>i have no car (freshman in college dorms)

>surely it isn't that serious

>thanks to google i now have 200% more bat knowledge and Boy I Fucked Up

>me to my mutual: it only bit me a few times and its teeth are so tiny it didn't even break the skin i'm sure i'll be fine :)

>i am of a curious nature so i google rabies symptoms

>oh! i need to get rabies shots!

so my ER experience was actually something pretty similar

me: hi, i need a rabies shot

triage nurse: oh? why's that?

me: i got bitten by a bat

triage nurse: what were you doing that you got bitten by a bat in the middle of the day?

me: picking up a bat off the sidewalk

triage nurse:

cthlynn

biden losing cardi b… oh i say it's joever every day but it is SO fucking joever for REAL

SAY THAT COMRADE B

patient dying in the name of toxic yaoi as it should be

Lesbians famously do not like seeing girls panting over each other and kissing with saliva connecting their mouths.

As a lesbian I most certainly AM here for this

"fetishized yuri for straight men"

SAG doesn't have any labor protection for its members who got fired for being pro-Palestine. Not surprising given that its president, Fran Drescher raised 60 million dollars for the IDF

no offense but can you guyws stop with the taylor swift shit

the ghoulishness that Palestine has revealed under the West’s facade of civility is truly insane, thousands dead and celebrities wave around stickers encouraging genocide in a nice restaurant, SNL makes jokes at their expense, every media apparatus falls over themselves in their haste to call all pro-Palestinian movement terrorism, I mean it’s all rotten. Meanwhile, the IDF go completely mask off and begin bombing Lebanon bc with white phosphorus as their colonialist campaign expands more into the Middle East.

You need to be paying attention this, even if only out of self interest, because Israel’s ties go beyond the initial colonial perspective. The IDF already been proven to be training police in the US, and with current protests against Cop City in Georgia resulting in the threatened arrest of journalists, you have to be worried. Turning way and allowing Israel to carry out a genocide unimpeded spells out a future of fascism for the whole world.

is that really old man yaoi or are they thirty

HE GOT BICURIOUS IN THE TIMELOOP !!!