i have some issues with my past self but she was young and i forgive her my real beef is with present me what is she doing im embarrassed to even look
when covid ends i will be kissing all my friends on the lips in greeting like an italiana mobster
I think it is brave and also very sexy of me to continue living
shout out to all the brave and very sexy individuals who are still here with us despite life being tough. that's extremely voluptuous and your meat is huge
youve heard of Depression Meals now get ready for Dissociation Meals:
- an entire frozen pizza, eaten over the course of five hours
- going into the kitchen, forgetting why you’re in the kitchen, and leaving without any food
- an emergency candy bar because you forgot to eat lunch again
- three glasses of milk
- eating more food than you thought you Could and then remembering you didn’t have breakfast and Oh thats why you felt so awful earlier, huh
- a bag of chips you didn’t mean to eat all of
- whatever’s close
- Big Elaborate Home Cooked Meals, but the same ones over and over
- “have i eaten today”
- going to bed hungry because you’re too tired to make and eat dinner
- a midnight snack because after trying to sleep you realized you’re actually really hungry
- straight salami in the middle of the night
- or maybe that one is just me
bonus executive dysfunction meal:
- just Not Eating for hours because you have to do the dishes first
wreck-it-remy2
- Finally just ordering pizza after 3 days without a proper meal
@thethorabides do you feel seen?
me, watching the election: why tf is dracula trending rn
twitter:
if there's any of us left, teaching world history on the year 2020 is gonna be such a trip and i don't see it going down any other way than future students thinking their teachers are tripping on acid
Sex stuff you probably won’t learn from fanfiction and/or porn:
Erotic fic and porn can be a lot of fun! But if you aren’t being provided with adequate sex ed through other channels (comprehensive sexual education, frank and open discussions with trusted adults, etc.), turning to fanfic and porn for your understanding of sex is gonna leave some major blindspots and may leave you with some unrealistic expectations. While there’s nothing wrong with these kinds of erotica, they are fictional and tend to leave out a lot of the more realistic, human parts of sex - they serve a great purpose, but that purpose isn’t primarily educational. The following is an incomplete list of some things you should probably know about sex that a lot of fic and porn tends to leave out:
- It isn’t always super hot or super sweet. Sometimes it’s super silly. Or sometimes it’s sort of mundane and you’re both simply scratching an itch. That’s fine too. (Hell, sometimes you’re talking about comic books while boning and your partner is laughing that you’re getting REALLY ANGRY about spider-man while they’re going to town on you.)
- You will probably not climax at the same moment. It’s a sweet idea, but extremely hard to coordinate, and if all your concentration is going into coming at the exact same moment, you’re probably not enjoying yourselves as much as you might.
- Sometimes bodies make weird, goofy noises. Squelching, slapping, air-escaping, un-sexy noises. It’s okay to laugh at this.
- Hell, it’s okay to laugh during sex in general.
- Sometimes you fart. Sometimes you fart while someone is going down on you and it is embarrassing as hell. This isn’t the end of the world. Embarrassing body things happen. Heck, sometimes, with anal, there’s a little poo. You get over it.
- Sometimes sex is… kinda bad? This doesn’t mean it’s assault, or something traumatic – sometimes it’s consensual but just kinda bleh and not what you hoped for. The best thing to do (if you’re talking about sex with a partner and not just a hook up who you can not call back) is talk to them about it. Figure out what went wrong, what you enjoy and what you don’t, and communicate what techniques you do and don’t like. Also don’t be afraid to stop someone in the middle of the sex act you’re not enjoying and offer guidance on how to help make it good for you too. (Side tip: masturbation makes great research into what you personally do and don’t enjoy sexually)
- You won’t enjoy every sex act. Not every body is wired to find every thing pleasurable. You might find anal does nothing for you. You may find g-spot stimulation just makes you really anxious that you’re about to pee. You may not enjoy giving or receiving oral. You’re not broken if you don’t like something that every pornstar or smutty fanfic protagonist seems to have earth-shattering orgasms from. Everyone’s got nerve endings in a range of places – it’s quite literally, different strokes for different folks.
- On that note, not all orgasms are earth-shattering. Sometimes it just feels warm and nice. That’s fine too.
- Sometimes, if you’re neutral on a sex act and your partner loves it, you can suck it up for them, and they’ll suck up something they’re not crazy about for your pleasure in return. But communicate preferences with each other! Know that when a partner does that thing you love that they don’t get much from, that it’s an act of care, and vice versa.
- Falling asleep in each other’s arms right after wild passionate sex seems really romantic, but dried and crusty fluids are gonna be a bitch in the morning. Also, after sex, you should both (regardless of your equipment) go pee to clear out the urethra of any gunk or bacteria to reduce risk of a UTI.
- Putting a towel down on the bed before sex means you don’t have to sleep on wet funky sheets. (it’s also verrrrrry useful for period sex if you or your partner menstruate.)
- A lot of people don’t like dirty talk, or rough sex. Always ask first. (Fanfic on the whole does a better job than porn at showing communication, but a lot of it is still highly fictive on this point)
- PROTECTION PROTECTION PROTECTION. Use condoms, dental dams, etc. not just to prevent pregnancy, but to reduce risk of STIs. (Yes, even couples with the same genitals who don’t need to worry about pregnancy).
- Lube is great and very important, but random goopy things around you are not good lube. Random oils especially, since oil doesn’t flush out well and can trap bacteria inside the body – oil-based lubricant also degrades condoms. Use lube specifically designed for intimate purposes. Water-based and silicone-based lubes help sex feel really good!
- Bigger isn’t necessarily better. A lot of people with vaginas don’t enjoy the feeling of being repeatedly punched in the cervix by a monster cock. Some people enjoy a larger size when being penetrated by an appendage or toy and some don’t.
- Bodies are hairy. Genitals are hairy. You may get a pube stuck in your teeth at some point. If your partner is WAY fuzzier than porn ever led you to believe they’d be, well, that’s normal.
- Not everyone loves the taste of ejaculate. Sometimes it’s nasty (flavor tends to vary from person to person depending on their diet, but sometimes you just really don’t like it no matter what. Some of us hate the taste of peanut butter. People don’t always like things). It’s okay not to swallow, or to request a penis-having partner warn you so they don’t ejaculate in your mouth (in fact, it’s polite for them to do the latter).
- If you’re gonna have shower sex, get one of those rubbery mats for the shower floor that gives you traction, because otherwise it’s super embarrassing to call for an ambulance while dripping wet and naked because you slipped and accidentally broke something and your partner got a concussion while you were trying to bang in the shower.
- Moaning and screaming wildly during sex is fun but it will make the neighbors in the apartments adjacent to you hate you. Make choices accordingly.
This is all excellent advice. I could throw in a couple more:
Good advice. Also:
Muscle cramps happen. If you’re in a weird position, your body may decide to object. Pillows for support can be wonderful things.
Anyone who finds towels aren’t enough, they make waterproof pillowcases you can get for like $10. Fold a bath sheet in half, slide the pillowcase in between the layers.
Related, there is no such thing as too much lube. (I wish fanfic writers would depict using lube more often, and I am looking at myself in the mirror on this one.)
An absolute must read, ladies and gents!
spideygirl2003
Useful NSFW talk 👀👀
Along with muscle cramps, you or your partner my have hips that do not like being open wide for long periods of time or the movement that sex requires and might pinch, get stiff or pop out of place. PLEASE either move into a different position or take a moment to alleviate the pain when this happens.
This ✨
All I’m saying is I’ve never met a bisexual person who doesn’t identify with Waluigi at least a little bit.
What I mean when I use a self-anecdote to comfort someone: You're not alone in your experiences and your feelings are real and valid.
What it sounds like:
nonbinary-hawke-deactivated2021
For anyone who doesn't live with children or watch cartoons on a regular basis, Nickelodeon went off the air for 8 minutes and 46 seconds today. During that time, instead of playing shows or commercials, there was a Nickelodeon orange background with scrolling and repeating messages about racial equality, the right to education, and the right to be safe from harm and hatred.
For those who aren't aware, as I wasn't until I googled it, 8 minutes and 46 seconds was the exact amount of time that George Floyd was pinned on the ground.
There's nothing subtle about this and I'm just. Shocked. In a good way of course, I've just never seen this sort of rallying behind a race-based social movement.
The riot medicine PDF going around is really good from what I can tell- all their info directly mirrors this CDC advice, although there's a lot more talking about specifics when treating people in a riot/protest/street setting.
It also very specifically addresses a number of myths regarding teargas treatments in a way I think might be better than the CDC which doesn't really spend any of time on them. In activist circles, there's a lot of beliefs that get passed around and I think it's good to specifically address them.
Here's a link:
See above rb for link to riot medicine.
Reblogging from myself in the hopes of showing up in the notes. Forgot about the weird link thing Tumblr is doing.
i simply cannot stop thinking about this.
every time i think i’m done laughing for real this time i think about cops getting scared by the riot beans
Comrade Beans
catbuoy
Imagine shooting rubber bullets and throwing tear gas canisters at people but posting on social media like "oh boo hoo look what got thrown at us :((((" when someone throws a shoe or a tin of beans.
In Memory of the Victims
The names of those who passed away in KyoAni’s arson attack have finally all been revealed, so a dedication for them and their contributions to the animation world seems in order right now. In respect to the deceased, I’ve refrained from posting pictures of their faces and opted for using their works as a form of recognition instead.
Director Takemoto Yasuhiro
Color designer Ishida Naomi
In-between animator Uda Junichi
Key animator Kigami Yoshiji
Finish animator Tsuda Sachie
Key animator Kuriki Ami
Production manager Yokota Keisuke
Art director Watanabe Mikiko
Character designer Nishiya Futoshi
YOURE TELLING ME THIS IS WHAT THEY'VE BEEN SHOOTING PROTESTERS WITH????
YEP! These are meant to be skipped into the ground and then spin into people's legs and dissuade people from advancing or move them away. FIRING THEM AT PEOPLE'S HEADS IS 100% AGAINST THE PROPER USE. AND THEY ARE SHOOTING THESE AT MEDICS. DOCTORS, EMTS, AND NURSES. AT CLOSE RANGE. THESE CAN BREAK YOUR SKULL. THEY ARE NOT A JOKE. THIS IS LESS LETHAL LIKE A BASEBALL BAT IS LESS LETHAL THAN A SWORD. BOTH STILL CAN KILL.
I only found out today they’re meant to be fired at the ground to bounce back at protesters... I don’t think I’ve ever seen the cops use them that way