*dusts off the ol' Psychology degree and puts on her science hat*
Its super common! We did the thinky thing for a while like we were told to but never got anything out of it. They (teachers, principles, school board, local, state, and federal governments) expected us go forth and conquer, to be the next best thing in the world. So they pushed us and pushed us and pushed us, all while putting us on this crazy pedestal, ya know? But hanging over our heads was a sword on the thinnest bit of string that would fall if we ever disappointed them or didn't live up to their silly expectations.
When (not if, those expectations were practically impossible for anyone to live up too) that sword finally came crashing down on us, a lot of us spiral for a while. This is pretty common in college (cause we were all pushed to go to college, we had to have a degree) thanks to the freedom and lack of rules and structure that kept us on track for so many years. That spiraling can go several ways, many of which are self destructive, but for a lot of us it results in exploring our sexuality and developing some common kinks: praise, dumbification, personality/role play (typically dolls and/or bimbos but others exist too), orgasm denial, hypnosis, BDSM and more.
The big thing that ties these kinks we commonly develop, and sometimes jokingly refer as the "gifted kid to internet slut pipeline," is that they have structure and expectations attached to them or they reject what we were always forced to be.
Praise kinks are there because for a while we were told that we were amazing and special. Then that became an expectation we had to live up to and we were told less and less that we were doing a good job.
Dumbification kinks show up as an almost direct rebuff to how weve always been pushed to be the smartest and as a result of discovering that we might not actually be as smart as we were told we were just good at recognizing things (patterns in data and picking up on unstated rules are the most common). Also being "dumb" means you dont have the pressure of being the problem solver for the people around you and that can be very cathartic or very painful depending on how hard it is for you to shut off that part of your brain.
Personality and Roleplay both allow you to explore what you could have been instead of what you were forced to become by the people who either thought they were trying to help you be the best you could be (well meaning) or who were using you (not well meaning). Some people completely adopt the role or personality that they play as and reinvent themselves, others dabble in it as a pressure valve to release stress. People like me pick and choose what to adopt permenantly because we like those aspects and they make us happy and play with the rest when we want to. There is also a level of disassociation to these that can be unhealthy if you're not careful or aware.
Orgasm denial, hypnosis, and BDSM often come with rules and if we follow those rules we get rewarded. Which for us burnt out gifted people turned kinky sluts is like drugs. Knowing exactly what we need to do or not do is wonderful and when you combine it with rewards (see praise kink) is a potent combination (and is textbook conditioning, so please be careful with who you play with). Also all three, from the submissive angle, mean we dont have to make decisions (except for safety stuff ex. safe wording, negotiations, etc.) which is also a big draw for some people.
In conclusion, kinks, specifically certain kinks, are pretty common in burnt out gifted kids. You shouldn't feel called out for it. If anything it should be a call out to the people who failed us. As for us: enjoy our shared kinks! As long as you're being safe, sane, and consensual, practicing the various methods of keeping yourself safe online, and you're not harming anyone (yourself included) then your kinks should be celebrated and enjoyed!
- Please note, these are just observations and conclusions I've come to over the years. There are lots of generalizations here. Also my only sources are me and several former burnt out gifted people turned kinksters ive known over the years.-
