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Balls lagsania

@fruit-tea

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fruit-tea
alwayssunnyinsuccession
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alwayssunnyinsuccession

ok and when in s3 crowley reluctantly reads aziraphale’s diary for an explanation why he left expecting to see how aziraphale wishes crowley was an angel and good when in reality he finds 6000 years of jane austen level pining about crowley just the way he is what then

fruit-tea
nonamehorse
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nonamehorse

Women want me, fish fear me, I fear the fish, we have been enemies for as long as I can remember, we will lead to eachothers death, and yet, we are the only ones who can understand eachother, the thing we fear, is that we want eachother, but our love is forbidden, it can never happen, that is our greatest fear.

fruit-tea
bubba-draws
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bubba-draws

First doodle is a continuation of this post (man the way i used to draw them compared to now... the growth)

anyways, i missed my son, have some grimmch doodles (feat other sillies)

fruit-tea
bewarethecircles
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bewarethecircles

After a vacation in Alpha Centauri, Gabriel and Beelzebub come back to earth and move in together. They proceed to be the worst and most baffling neighbors anyone in the neighborhood has ever experienced. 

  • They introduced themselves as Bee and Jim, but immediately started laughing about it, so people are pretty sure those aren't their real names. 
  • Neither of them seem to have jobs, but they must be rich, because their house is massive and they're always wearing fancy clothes, and their wallets are bursting with money. Maybe they’re in the mafia?
  • Speaking of fancy clothes, “Jim” is always wearing designer suits. There is an ongoing game where people attempt to take a picture of him in any other clothes. One time, an enterprising teenager went so far as to sneak over in the middle of the night to look into his bedroom (hoping he’d be in pajamas), and saw him still in a suit, Standing on Top of the Bed, eyes wide open and Smiling Brightly. (Gabriel has not gotten the hang of sleeping yet.) (The teenager refuses to go near the house ever again.)
  • The short one, “Bee,” is consistently trailed by flies. This is alarming to everyone. They say that they're a “fly-keeper,” but people are pretty sure that's not a thing. Do they carry rotting meat around or something?
  • Bee also seems to be constantly changing appearances. One day they have a buzz cut, the next day their hair goes to their mid-back. Their eyes are a different colour every time you see them. People have set up cameras to take pictures of them on different days, and upon comparing them they are Definitely almost 6 inches taller this week. Even their facial features shift. 
  • It gets to the point where people decide Jim must just have multiple partners, and be lying about it. (“Multiple partners that all look similar and are never seen together?” the opposition will point out. When asked if they have a better theory, they can never answer.)
  • The two of them will have romantic moments Anywhere, including standing in the middle of the highway staring into each others eyes. By all rights they should have been run over, but in a bizarre coincidence every car in the area ran out of fuel and stopped moving at that exact moment. People want to blame Jim for it (he did make a strange hand movement, after all), but that would just be absurd.
  • They use the absolute worst pet names for each other. A list of overheard ones is being recorded. “My rotten cabbage?” “My hell-bringer?” “Dearest packet of crisps??” 
  • You cannot let them notice that you're disgusted by their lovey-doveyness. They will either get exponentially more cringey, or straight up insult you until you run away crying. Or both. 
  • “Everyday” by Buddy Holly will be audible to the whole block at all times. Do they know other songs exist? Don't they get bored of this one?? Why is it so loud???
  • There’s a statue of Jim in the front yard. Its 20 feet tall and definitely a HOA violation, but people are too scared to mention it. Both Bee and Jim will come out at different times and spend hours staring at it dreamily. 
  • People would hate them, but ever since they moved in the weather has been perfect, crime is at an all time low, and there’s little trucks that go around selling hot chocolate, and those things Probably cant be because of them, but still...
  • Plus, Jim doesn’t understand how money works at all, so he’ll give you $300 for a bag of chips. It's endearing, even if he is sometimes a jerk.
  • Bee does seem to know how money works, but they’ll frequently pay even more than Jim, especially if the person seems overworked and the place is under-staffed. They say they have experience with it.
  • After a month of them living there, most of the neighborhood is in a group chat created to discuss the two of them. Beelzebub is secretly in the chat, and reads their favourite theories to Gabriel. 
  • A rumour starts going around that they're an angel and a demon in disguise, but no one can agree which one is which. 
  • Beelzebub is the one who started the rumour. 

If anyone writes a fic with any of this by all means tag me I'd love to see it!!

fruit-tea
messy-jaxx

I'd very much like to punch a feminist.

I’d never, ever hurt a lady but I’d be happy to punch a feminist. It’d bring me great joy.

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olisaurusrex

I’m 6’2 and weigh 180lbs

ready when you are

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thattallsummonerguy

Or if you’d like to have some more options….

I’m 6’4” 228 pounds and have 9 years of combined martial arts training and 3 years of being a Line Backer in football. Just in case you are looking for variety.

what about a lady and a feminist. warning, combatives certified soldier.

im tiny, i’m like 5′4 and 130 lbs but u can fight me too

Reblogging for the last one cuz that’s adorable

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likeits1995

SO PROUD

The Fantastic 4 we deserve

OMG IVE ONLY SEEN THIS POST IN SCREEN SHOTS

We will all protect the small one.

I stan

it got better!!

plot-twist: the small one could actually kick everyone’s ass

If one day I see this on my dash and DON’T reblog it assume I’m dead.