i mean this completely seriously but… a cup of coffee can save your life a little, a shower can save your life a little, making your favorite meal can save your life a little…….little things actually add up to really big things in the long run if you let them, the secret to surviving everyday is infusing a little bit of magic into the mundane i truly believe that

🕯 🕯 🕯

🕯 May you have the 🕯

🕯 absolute thirstiest 🕯

🕯 of thirst dreams of 🕯

🕯 whatever fictional 🕯

🕯 character you’re 🕯

🕯 hyper-fixating on at 🕯

🕯 the moment 🕯

🕯 🕯 🕯

Humans are unstoppable…Until they aren’t.

I’m not the most eloquent writer, but I’ve had this idea kicking around for a while and figured I’d put it out into the universe.

A lot of the basis for the “humans are space orcs” stuff is the idea that we’re pretty durable compared to many species, yeah? When it comes to physical trauma, we can bounce back from most things that don’t kill us outright, especially given the benefit of hypothetical space-age technology, and adrenaline is one heck of a drug when it comes to functioning under stress. 

But that doesn’t make us unkillable, and even though we can survive debilitating injuries and not die from shock, it doesn’t mean it’s fun. Dying of shock sucks, but at least it’s probably quick.

So - Imagine a ship, adrift in space, slowly being drawn into a star or something. In order to save the ship, someone has to repair the hyper-quantum-relay-majig on the hull or in the engine or whatever. Bit of a problem though- there’s a ton of deadly, deadly radiation (Wrath of Khan style) or poisonous fumes or, I dunno, electrical current, between the crew and the repair. Like, enough to kill most species instantly, so the crew is just like, ‘welp, guess we’ll die then’. But then.

BUT THEN

They ask the human. Because everyone’s heard the stories - you’re basically unkillable, right? Could you survive long enough in there to fix it? And their human goes real quiet for a second, but still says ‘Yeah, I could fix it’. And the rest of the crew is like, ‘Whaaaaaa, it won’t kill you?’ and the human repeats “I can fix it” (which isn’t an answer, but no one catches that, not yet at least), so they send ‘em in. And the human fixes it, they come back, the ship flies to safety, and the crew is thrilled to survive. If the human is a little quiet, well, they’re entitled after pulling off a miracle. Everyone else is just excited to get to the nearest station’s bar to tell their very own human story, cuz, ‘those crazy humans, amiright?’.

The good mood keeps up until the human is late for their next shift. At first it’s just faint unease, but- but they earned a bit of a lie-in, right? No reason to begrudge them some extra rest, even if it is a little weird for them to oversleep. They’ll be fine. Humans are always fine. 

(Right?)

(…Wrong.)

- What is… help. Help!-

- ake up! You have t-

- been days. You need sleep, you-

- nother transfusion. We could-

- out of sedatives!-

A week later, the crew finally reaches the station. They stumble into the bar, haggard and haunted. And over the next months and years a new rumor about humans starts to make its way through space. A rumor unlike any before.

‘Be careful with your humans’ it whispers. ‘Their strength is not always a blessing. Be sure they don’t do something they can’t come back from, because when a human dies… they die slowly.’

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

Might I add:

The defeat of the wizard who made people choose how they’d be to be executed

The woman who raised the changeling alongside her biological child

The human who died of radiation poisoning after repairing the spaceship

The adventures of a space roomba

Cinderella finding Araura (and falling in love)

I don’t know a snappy description but the my nemesis cynthia story certainly lives in my head

hilariously, these are almost all in my fic tag. so, a compiled list from the notes (and some extras):

I am in love with you /p

Adding Faceblind Prince Charming and Cinderella

21. The human who died of radiation poisoning after repairing the spaceship

22. The defeat of the wizard who made people choose how they’d be to be executed

adding the Doctors Without Borders one

I LOVE tumblr storytime, so here’s a bunch more your weekend reading. Enjoy!

24. The Queen with Three Cursed Children

25. Tiny Dragon with one coin hoard

26. Haunted house

27. Shark hero was about to go rogue

28. Grandma lives in the woods comic

29. A Different Aftermath comic

30. Battery (microstory but I love it so much)

31. It’s A Date comic

32. Supervillian kidnaps rival’s kid and they want to stay

33. Narrative Town

34. I have been hired to clean the wizard tower comic

35. Robot Apocalypse

36. The Statues That Do Not Weather

37. Kushiel

38. Tooth Fairy

39. Alien abduction

40. Felonious wish-granting

41. When humans met actual space orcs

42. Space cousins

WAIT REBLOG THIS VERSION INSTEAD

hits the bong and immediately becomes aware of the narrative

hits the bong again and looks directly at the camera knowingly

this is how eve got expelled from Eden

I like how bong can mean both penis and that big vertical disk that makes a lot of noise.

that's dong and gong. bong means neither of those things

This edible (fruit from the tree of knowledge) ain’t doing shit.

I’m naked.

self proclaimed schizoposter nervously typing '911' into their phone and hovering their thumb above the 'call' key as they hawkishly watch a disheveled guy at a bus stop make repetitive movements and ramble to himself

You know what lemme just come back to this post because I (physically disabled, joint pain, cane user) was on a full train last night with the biggest heaviest backpack you could imagine bcs I’ve just become homeless and I was on my way to a friends house. I tried to ask people for a seat and got flat out ignored. Nobody would even look at me. It got to a point where I was literally shaking crying sobbing dry heaving resorting to begging “I’m really sorry everyone but can someone please give me their seat I have joint problems I’m in a lot of pain”, speaking to people directly “excuse me but you’re in priority seating and I’m disabled and I really need to sit down” and the only person in the whole train who would even LOOK at me while I was wheezing and clutching my stomach and sweating about to pass out in some of the most rancid pain I’ve ever felt in my life. was an old disheveled guy with a tic who was mumbling to himself. and he quietly tried to console me and convinced me to just sit on someone’s suitcase. I hope all the unnatural hair coloured pierced 20 somethings on that train that night ESPECIALLY never know peace for the rest of their fucking lives

You seriously can’t call yourself a leftist or a progressive or whatever if you can’t treat other people like actual human beings. I’ve had disheveled people who a lot of ppl would assume are homeless, be quicker to offer me a place to sit on a train than 20 somethings with unnatural hair color and “Be Gay do Crime” pins and stickers do that (esp when I injured my ankle coming back from work nobody except a mumbling elderly lady offered me their seat). They’re also not the ones who threaten to call cops on me when I’m taking foodstuffs from grocery stores! You can post about anarchy and being progressive and unhinged all you want but the fact that you would treat people who are physically disabled and in poverty this way makes you just as an awful person as anybody else

“It's just a small handful of ibuprofen, and it will help the words fade away."

unironically people need to learn to say “they haven’t done anything wrong i just find them annoying”

I personally think people need to understand that if someone hasn’t wronged you or anyone else, you should NOT dislike them. You don’t have to like them; just remain neutral.

nope! this is the kind of attitude the leads to you picking apart every little thing a person does digging through their past for dirt and problematizing everything about them, exaggerating harm, assuming the worst about them, putting words in their mouth, etc, to justify the fact that you simply don’t vibe with them when the truth is that you will not get along with everybody you meet in life and it’s extremely possible to be civil to someone you don’t like. you don’t have to be friends with everybody its fine. it’s certainly nicer than falsely accusing them of some heinous shit rather than admit that you’re not some Disney princess who’s never had an unfairly mean thought in her life and loves everybody and sings with little birdies and is never bitchy or irritable. sometimes you get annoyed for stupid reasons and understanding that your personal feelings about a person aren’t necessarily related to their morals or worthiness as a human being is the first step to being a civil adult.

That’s it, that’s all I got. Happy Valentine’s Day, tumblr, thank you for tolerating me.

oh my god you're so right

the closet you say

Source

Interesting to call this “confiscating” when it’s just making the rich pay their fair share, especially considering all the stolen wealth from the bottom 99% and historic tax evasion.

if i were showrunner i would have simply licensed ABBA

I’ve never seen a single episode of supernatural. Is this the ship everyone has been waiting to become canon? Because I get why

i sometimes forget that if u haven’t seen spn u would have absolutely no idea that misha collins had to put on this ridiculous fucking voice for 12 years

you’re leaving out the best part

So originally Misha Collins was supposed to be on for like 3 or 4 episodes tops (even tho he’s given one of the most badass entrances in television history) and so Misha was like “oh well okay I’m this MASSIVE preternatural being inhabit a teeny tiny human, I probably have a big voice and am kind of not sure how to human, so I’ll give him a deep voice, it kind of hurts my throat but it’s only a few episodes”

and then he came on screen in that huge overcoat and lights above him blew and he was shot several times and stabbed and casually took the knife out of his chest made Bobby fall asleep and turned to a terrified angry Dean and said in that deep gravelly voice “I’m the one who gripped you right and raised you from perdition”

and then he had to do it for 12 more years

all because he was told he would only be in a few episodes and so he made a creative choice that ultimately changed the course of pop culture history

Okay, I need to know.

spiders gorj

Keep an Eye Out As You Travel West

Then keep on moving.

And they were pier-mates!!

Happy MerMay