Friendly Neighbourhood Pizza Man

am 100% sure he has actually said this

David Tennant is funny cause he’s like a weird little Scottish Presbyterian man with 4 kids who wears dorky sweaters and doesn’t know what the eggplant emoji means and has no social media accounts but his type cast is “Slutty Goth Thot” and I think that’s beautiful

“i am a monument to all your sins” is such a fucking raw line for a villain it’s amazing that it came from halo, a modernish video game, and not some classical text or mythos

classic texts have nothing on the crazy people come up with in modern times tbh

– Joshua Graham, Who Is A Fallout New Vegas NPC, Something Most People Throwing This Quote Around Don’t Realize

– Shadow the Hedgehog in what is widely considered one of if not the single worst game in the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise

this is the source for this text and it haunts me on a regular basis

Huh, it’s almost like art isn’t just fine art…

this is my addition to this ever growing list of raw quotes originating from unexpected sources

#discovering that the profound is lurking behind the absurd#just waiting for the chance to peek through like sunlight through the clouds#is one of the best things in life once you start to notice it

this is a beautiful way to put it and i’m gonna cry abt it

apparently the moon is moving farther away from the earth and I just wanna say that im sorry if it’s something I’ve done

People say “phase” like impermanence means insignificance. Show me a permanent state of the self.

holy shit this quote changed my life about four years ago. so crazy that this just resurfaced. i’m really happy.

my entire life is an example of idiot plot

anyone else ever daydream for 6 hours straight and then after ur just like nah let’s scrap that and do it all again but slightly to the left

my brain: *out of breath* Was that good?!

Me in a beret, taking a long draft from a cigarette and leaning back in my director’s chair: once again, from the top, this time with feeling

does anybody else feel like they age in phases of niche interests rather than years

DONT!TEXT!HIM!

THAT S SO ME IM SCREAMING

im what the victorians would call a “vile, ill-tempered and thoroughly wretched little creature”

The San Francisco Examiner, California, February 25, 1935

Sometimes I think humankind hasn’t changed at all. 

I dunno about the average man but I think we can make an educated guess about the person who wrote this article.

why do I eat so much fucking SOUP

PLEASE do not fucking say that

ok but imagine peter not caring about his secret identity anymore and not making any effort to conceal it yet absolutely no one finds out he’s spiderman. peter wears the suit under his pants and a jacket but literally no one notices. he only gets a ‘cool shirt dude’ from a student he doesnt know. he does the iconic spiderman shooting-webs-from-his-hands pose in every single picture. no one says a word. he enters the classroom through the window. just as him, not spiderman. the classroom is on the second floor. no one cares.

Sounds like college

“man that peter guy really likes spider man, i hope he gets to meet him someday”

Spiderman says on live tv “my name is peter parker” and his classmates are like huh. What a coincidence. Class peter is probably going nuts over this

Also being a scientist pretty much gives you a free pass to be as eccentric as you want like you’ll be at a conference and it’s like “is that guy wearing socks and sandals and plaid pants???” “Ya but he was on the team that discovered gravitational waves let him be”

I once saw a highly-respected mineralogist take a slice of watermelon, put it between the two halves of a bagel, and eat it like a sandwich.

I love that Chris Evans wore a name tag at his high school reunion like every person there hasn’t spent the last 8 years telling people “you know I used to go to high school with captain america”

ever think about how istanbul was constantinople… now it’s istanbul, not constantinople

Why did Constantinople get the works?

thats nobody’s business but the turks