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In english, we say “shut the fuck up” but in spanish they say “cierra la boca puta” which translates to shut your bitch mouth and i think thats beautiful

sometimes I feel guilty for skipping songs on my phone like I’m sorry song I love you I’m just not in the mood for you I’ll come back later though.

And then you never play them ever again

"The Favorite" by Omar Rayyan

Favorite what? Demon?!

Loving the fact that whatever it is is wearing a matching flower.

"can I keep it?"

Uh, didn’t Nicki Minaj bank a 12 million dollar paycheck to sit at a table every week for American Idol and doesn’t she star in a movie with Cameron Diaz, Leslie Mann, and Kate Upton this Spring?

Yeah, Im cool with being Nicki Minaj. You can be that disposable white girl.

Uh, didn’t Nicki Minaj bank a 12 million dollar paycheck to sit at a table every week for American Idol and doesn’t she star in a movie with Cameron Diaz, Leslie Mann, and Kate Upton this Spring?

Yeah, Im cool with being Nicki Minaj. You can be that disposable white girl.

I have a really bad headache. Medical side of tumblr what should I do?

smack your head into a wall until it goes away

ok i did that now there is a hole in my wall. Carpenter side of tumblr how do i fix this?

ya gotta fuck it

"gonna sell these kids some drugs"

Shit about to go down in my speech textbook.

as a serial killer my name would be the suspense so my victims would be like “oh no, the suspense is killing me” and we would both laugh right before i killed them

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hmm 666

6+6+6=18

18….

Obama was 18 once

very scary

not sure what this information means

brought to you by Fox News

it’s weird how yogurt is almost exclusively advertised to women

psychofactz

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I feel like people in horror movies live in an alternate universe where there are no horror movies

That explains a lot

"Man humans are lame why don’t we have like wings/horns/etc"

Humans can’t even handle having different skin colors how well do you really think that would go

"u missed di schoo bus eh?"

"yes fadda"

"find a wey ti schoo den"