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I got 99 problems Madeleine & Joey are all of them

@flootzavut / flootzavut.tumblr.com

(No but I love you really, please never change) You can talk to me in Russian, Hebrew, French or Esperanto. I'm horrible at tagging; please tread carefully. ze/zir. bi.
I'm pretty sure the horror and the wild is going to murder me in my sleep and I'll thank it, buster.
Always pie adjacent. Old. Probably your mum. Making our own mythology since 1953.
If I don't make it back from where I've gone, please know I've loved you all along.

Whatup TAD fandom, I bring a quizzy thing with which to torture yourself!

In previews it says it can't be found, but I and others have successfully opened it in browsers so 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼

Have fun making yourself make choices. (Spoiler: it's so difficult omg.)

Semi-inspired by @peach-pot's TAD bracket.

I love how both Horror and Love Run both start gently, easing you into the world they create with their music and words, then you get to Ruin and blam, you're yeeted straight into the fae realm, do not pass go, do not collect 200 leprechaun gold, with this absolute banger of a song. They really said "we're back, bitches" and I love this for all of us.

I feel like love run was "would you like to go with us on a magical adventure?"

Horror was this:

And ruin is being unexpectedly kidnapped and before you know what's happening you're already in the fae realm.

Love Run is finding the ideal forest glade in which to build your faery ring.

THATW is the process of building said

Ruin is falling into it.

Ooooh I like this take!

This year, on the 31 March, we lost Gilbert Baker, gay artist and creator of the gay pride flag. Today we would celebrate his 66th birthday. Let’s remember him as the wonderful person he was.

i just want to add to this post that the last update made to the official pride flag by Glibert Baker before he passed away was THIS:

the new lavender stripe at the very top was added to represent DIVERSITY and as far as i am aware, was added in retaliation against trump’s presidency. i’ve not seen many people use this version, and it deserves to be known.

Can I Think Crowley Is Gender Fluid?

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You might as well. I do.

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everyone please remember that this DOES NOT mean that they are genderfluid canonically. may i point to the other one thousand asks neil has replied to about headcanons where he says that word-of-god does not make his own headcanons canon unless it's explicit in the text. genderfluid crowley is a great headcanon that i personally love and it's nice that neil likes it too, but don't take this and run with it too far. it's not canon and other crowley gender headcanons are also valid!

all in all DO NOT start bullying children online who think crowley is transfem or Whatever The Fuck

This is what we have from the book:

Many people, meeting Aziraphale for the first time, formed three impressions: that he was English, that he was intelligent, and that he was gayer than a tree full of monkeys on nitrous oxide. Two of these were wrong; Heaven is not in England, whatever certain poets may have thought, and angels are sexless unless they really want to make an effort. But he was intelligent. And it was an angelic intelligence which, while not being particularly higher than human intelligence, is much broader and has the advantage of having thousands of years of practice.

and, later in the book we learn that,

For those of angel stock or demon breed, size, and shape, and composition, are simply options.

And from the TV show we have a couple of scenes in which Crowley is presenting as female, particularly the scenes in which he's Nanny Ashtoreth, and nobody turns a hair. So that stuff is canon.

Beyond that, whatever you want to think or believe is absolutely fine by me. And, because headcanon is headcanon, it can also contradict any of that as well....

My headcanon is that Crowley is a "yes gender" gay and Azi is a "gender ew" gay. Azi tried gender on and went "ew wtf is this nonsense" whereas Crowley tried gender on and went "gotta catch 'em all" 🤭 and I love them both for this 🥹🥰

Favorite Female Buffyverse Vampire

HOW CAN YOU MAKE ME CHOOSE

Drusilla is about seeing the future but not being able to prevent your own pain

Darla is a matriarch who died because of (writers's) misogyny

Harmony is like a piñata full of glitter and blood

V!Willow is a wlw awakening

V!Buffy is the best concept in the world, the DUALITY, THE OPPORTUNITIES

Sunday is

a piñata full of glitter and blood

This is the best description 🤣

I want to kill with fire the notion that realism in smut is inherently unsexy.

This is a subject I could go on about forever, but it’s late and I’m tired so imma boil it down:

1) If use of lube, condoms etc is spoiling the moment, that is a writing failure, it does not mean that those things automatically spoil the mood.

And don’t get me wrong, not throwing stones. I have used shortcuts, I have handwaved stuff because I couldn’t figure out how to make it work or just couldn’t be arsed. I’m not saying go repent in sackcloth and ashes if you ever had a couple of characters indulge in unsafe sex, I’m saying be honest enough to say it’s a choice you made, and don’t fall back on the lazy excuse that it wasn’t possible or that lube or condoms or foreplay would somehow spoil things. It’s just not true that these things can’t be tackled without spoiling a moment, and to claim that is just making excuses. Stop doing that. Please.

2) Be aware that much as people try to say these things spoil the mood or make a story less enjoyable or sexy, depending on your reader, the reverse may well be true. The assumption that realism is automatically less sexy is just inaccurate.

If I read a scene where a guy thrusts into a woman in one stroke, then unless they have worked up a head of steam so I know she’s ready, I assure you, I’m wincing at my computer screen. If you are having a character get anally penetrated without lube, then unless there’s some in universe explanation (even if it’s just magic! magic works! this isn’t rocket science!) or you tackle the fact they’re the rare and lucky individual for whom that works without discomfort (something I’ve only heard about as rumour, but I’m prepared to believe they exist… just not that they’re so common your characters can take it for granted that this is okay), then my eyes are watering in sympathy. Those are the two examples that are most obvious and that make me cringe most often, if it wasn’t so late, I dare say there would be more.

And I don’t mean “I’m clutching my pearls and having a conniption fit because of Poor Writing” - it means I’m viscerally reacting because ouch! This shit can fucking hurt.

~~~

Like, okay, people will continue to write wildly unrealistic fanfic smut that defies anatomy and makes me want to cross my legs forever. I’m resigned to that.

But can we please stop pretending it’s because realism can’t be sexy or can’t be incorporated into said sex scenes without making them unsexy? And can we maybe acknowledge that as well as the possibility that realism can be sexy, that supposed “fantasy” sex that can’t be bothered with any of those boring things like condoms and lube and foreplay might not actually be inherently hotter and may actually be really damn cringeworthy? And that criticism of that is because people are empathising with the characters? That maybe it’s possible to write smut that is hot without throwing reality out of the window and where the people involved would have fun for better reasons than “because I’m saying they did”?

Maybe I’m deluded thinking anyone will read this, but if there’s a chance it’ll mean just one less scene that makes its readers wince… I can hope.

Additional thought: surely I’m not the only person who thinks smut is better when it seems like the parties involved are genuinely having fun, not performing for an audience?

I actually think this is a v important point, esp. (but not only) for anyone who isn’t a cis/het man, and speaks to a wider, more disturbing cultural issue that has worsened with the easy online availability of pornography. Sex should NOT HURT. (Unless you really want it to). Your sexual health and experience should never be sacrificed for anyone else’s enjoyment. If sex doesn’t involve your consent, your choice, your safety, your health and your pleasure then you’re having sex with the wrong person. Sure, haste and passion can be super sexy (if not practical). But so can patience, time, exploration and care. Oh baby.

Personally, I learnt A LOT about sex through fanfic (weird religious background) so I am always aware that it can be a way, not just of expunging some juicy shipper desires, but of modelling positive sexualities. Not sayin I have always gotten this 100% right but I think fanfic can be, and is for many users, a really potent site for exploring how ethical (if hypothetical) sexual interactions and ways of being may function.   

Valdo Marx, the Weird Al Yankovic of the Witcher Universe, infuriates Jaskier with his “Toss a Loin to your Witcher (Go Down On Him Plenty)” parody song.