If your goal is to normalize gender-nonconformity you’re gonna have to accept that some people will fuck with gender as hard as they can while still being unequivocally, 100% cis and that is okay. There’s no egg to crack or callout to write. This is a good thing actually.
Need to be mindful for our feathered friends!
I’ve queued this to post around the time that alot of babies will be hatching.
Go buy some frozen veggies and feed the babies
It is baby season right now. A lot of babies are being born right now and people keep bringing them into the sanctuary. Sometimes its best to leave them alone.
nick walker, from neuroqueer heresies: notes on the neurodiversity paradigm, autistic empowerment, and postnormal possibilities, 2021
1. The process of suppressing my visible expressions of autistic embodiment and trying to pass for neurotypical for the sake of survival in my younger years seemed remarkably similar to the process of suppressing my femininity and trying to pass as a cisgender heterosexual male for the sake of survival in my younger years.
2. If the process of liberating myself from my acquired habits of masculine gender performance and letting myself embody more fluid and feminine gender expressions could be described as a process of queering heteronormativity, then perhaps the process of liberating myself from my acquired habits of neurotypical performance and letting myself em body my neurodivergence could be described as queering neuronormativity.
3. The more I reflected on the process by which I was pushed into the ill-fitting confines of heteronormative gender per formance and the process by which I was pushed into the ill-fitting confines of neuronormative performance, the more it became clear that the two processes weren't mere ly similar or parallel: they were deeply and thoroughly en twined with one another, with no solid dividing line be tween them. Ultimately it wasn't two similar and parallel processes I was looking at, but a single multifaceted process.
4. If the social imposition of heteronormative performance was inseparably entwined with the social imposition of neuronormative performance, then the process of liberating myself from the confines of heteronormative performance was also inseparably entwined with the process of liberating myself from neuronormative performance. The queering of heteronormativity and the queering of neuronormativity were interconnected at some fundamental level. I couldn't truly liberate myself from heteronormativity without also liberating myself from neuronormativity, and I couldn't truly liberate myself from neuronormativity without also liberating myself from heteronormativity.
I fucking hate the “explaining = invalidating” when it comes to apologies. Yes, sometimes a person means to invalidate you by saying this, but sometimes we genuinely just want to fucking explain our side so we can properly communicate.
I do not know what the fuck is wrong until I’m told what I’ve done wrong and feel the need to explain in order for us to see both of our sides
I like getting explanations with apologies because for me it helps lessen the damage that was done or can help clear the negative emotions.
I’ve had multiple people say it’s a sign that I’m a bad person that I don’t apologize right away, or that I’m giving excuses instead of owning up and apologizing (which is fucking hard for me to know if I’m actually in the wrong or not and people doing this shit does NOT fucking help). Apologies aren’t always just a “Sorry” one and done deal thing.
knowing that someone didn't mean to harm you, and in fact may have been trying to help, can be comforting! knowing how they came to choose actions that harmed you can help you both collaborate to avoid harm in the future! Knowing whats going on in the mind of your loved ones can be important and bring you closer together in times of possible conflict! An explanation is NOT an excuse, thats true, but that also means that someone explaining doesn't mean they're not ALSO trying to apologize on top of that!
I've always considered explanations to be a vital part of an apology! I mean, if you've done something to upset a person, they deserve to know why you did it. Just saying sorry and leaving it at that isn't helpful.
He's our king
white boy summer getting an early start i see
love how that lady in the bg doesnt even notice him
No one commenting on his padawan braid?
what the FUCK
Anakin Skywalker behavior
huge buckaroo news. chuck partnered with macmillan audio to create terrifying new audiobook of my first self-published horror novella STRAIGHT read by andre santana this will be available EVERYWHERE you can get audiobooks on may 23rd even the dang library
STRAIGHT was longlisted for stoker award last year and definitely part of the timelines aligning to create a place for CAMP DAMASCUS. while these two stories are not related as sequels it is PERFECT QUEER HORROR APPETISER for buckaroos who cant wait until our summer camp trip
'straight' is queer subversion of zombie tropes it is story of ONE DAY A YEAR where all cis straight humans are driven into violent rage and how this changes the world and how queer buds rely on eachother for survival. i love this story. HUGE thanks to andre santana for the read
Someone requested ADHD life hacks, and this response was my favorite.
"The Next 10 Minutes method is ideal for ADHD brains.
Find something that seems impossible. Set a timer for 10 minutes.
Do the impossible thing for 10 minutes.
If it starts feeling less impossible, set another time for 10 minutes. If it still feels impossible, take a break.
Our brains make an insane amount of dopamine when we're being productive.
The 10 minute method isn't about quality. It's literally about quantity. Be productive doing SOMETHING for 10 minutes. Make dopamine for 10 minutes. You'll feel better...or your brain is tired and needs to rest. Win win either way."
This works really well, and you get something out of it pretty fast. A smaller mess. A rush of dopamine for doing something helpful for yourself.
I have ADHD but ALSO depression/GAD/CPTSD/Other Woes. So "do a small act of productivity" advice felt for a long time like it was unattainable because that stuff was STACKING. But once I started trying even when it felt like shit, I realized I was capable of a lot more than I thought.
Because Tumblr is the way it is (full of angels and fools and people who are both, and all of us wounded and yelling about it) I need to do a disclaimer before I go into the rest: It's sometimes accurate to say "No, I'm REALLY MESSED UP and I CAN'T."
Certainly that is the case for me quite often. The other day I went to get a soup bowl and accidentally tipped a bunch of clean dishes into a dirty sink. I was devastated. I could not do anything more than get a bowl and when that went wrong I could literally do nothing more, not even to eat. It happens.
So believe me, I know The Impossibles. ALSO if you have any physical limitations like pain or chronic fatigue, that's different and I can't speak to that as those difficulties are not ones I share.
But I also want people to know that those of us used to The Struggles do spend more time than we think able to do small things. So we should stop and think, "I am certainly deep in The Miseries right now, but what if I tried to be kind and helpful to future me for a bit?"
"What happens if it sucks and I don't even go 10 minutes, or it doesn't work and I don't feel better?" Well, you can still be proud of yourself. An act of kindness towards yourself counts as much as being kind to someone else (please, darling, trust me that it does).
And if it goes well, how WONDERFUL that you feel better. Or at least did something.
ALSO THIS APPLIES TO PLAY.
You NEED to play. And you deserve to, no matter how behind you are on other things.
Everything sucks and is boring? Oh god yes it is. I get it. But can you gently and guiltlessly play for 10 minutes? Can you watch some fun videos of art being made or baby horses learning to run or people testing crossbows? Can you sketch something for 10 minutes? Give some dolls a wardrobe change? Rearrange a shelf? Just engage for a little while in something you enjoy when you feel well, or do something to make your environment prettier. Open some curtains and look at some favorite objects
I mention play to emphasize that it is a positive motion towards feeling better, when you are Submerged In The Deeps lifting yourself IS productive, and can help even when you do not think it will at first.
When we are discussing alleviating suffering, I don't give a fuck about people getting back on their feet so they can do labor, which is how a lot of dialogue about recovery is oriented. I don't give a single shit! I give a fuck about people not suffering. I give a fuck about people having HOPE and being LESS MISERABLE and sometimes that means trying to restore PLAY by force of will, even if it doesn't work that time. It's okay to reach for recovering your joy first.
ANYTHING you can do to make yourself feel marginally less shitty is worth trying for 10 minutes.
Yes. Yes, thank you. Yes.
if they rebooted austin powers it would either be the most tone deaf unfunny incredibly offensive movie in years OR they'd do it right and really keep with the times in being very self aware and it would be one of the best films in decades. austin powers would be a massive support of trans rights because trans women means more women for him to shag
oh your pronouns are she/they? well baby lemme she/them titties shagadelic
austin powers discovers bisexuality and it blows his fucking mind
He lived in the 60s party scene you can't tell me he doesn't know what bisexuality is
Listen
Austin Powers was originally a send-up of James Bond and even James Bond is bisexual now (has been since 2012 actually) At this point Austin Powers would have to be a pansexual slut so active he makes Frank N. Furter look like a virgin if he wanted to make fun of James Bond He would totally be for trans rights, baybee.
Description: [A video of a woman riding a galloping horse bareback while holding a large rainbow flag.]
i felt like these tags really added to the experience, thanks @cynderxdustypaws for your knowledge
My friend takes this one step further and refers completely accurately to his girlfriend Danielle as "My partner, Dan"
Also i hate to say it but for some people, boyfriend/girlfriend feels a bit juvenile, say, if youre over 30, or perhaps youve been with someone for a very long time and are committed life partners but not married for whatever reason. Maybe husband/wife feels a little watered down to you and you want to establish the equal nature of your relationship.
Partner is a wonderful word and it should be normalized.
We actively asked people to use "partner" because then using partner doesn't out someone as queer, you absolute fucking cabbages.
It isn't appropriation when people ask you to fucking do it.
yes hello i would like to emphasize this
disgust is not a moral issue
being a pepper plant has to be so weird.
Imagine evolving capsaicin specifically to stop mammals from eating your fruits, and then a mammal comes along that not only will eat your fruits, but likes them specifically because of the capsaicin, so much that it starts using its weird paws to distribute and care for your seeds, which turns into a strong selective force that literally starts evolving you into producing MORE capsaicin and makes you a WAY more successful and wider ranged species than you ever were before
simply because this mammal LOVES Pain Chemical. that evolved specifically to produce pain in mammals. It's not that the capsaicin isn't WORKING. It's just that these freaks like it.
This is the same mammal with social instincts so goddamn strong that they literally try to form social bonds with their predators, and end up evolving the predators into a new species that fits into their social communities as a form of mutualistic symbiosis, and exists in several different forms with unique morphology and behaviors based on the function they perform.
Instead of, I don't know, EVOLVING TO BE FASTER, this animal finds a faster animal and sits on it. Which shouldn't even work because the faster animal is a prey animal and this animal is a predator, but SOMEHOW they FORM A SOCIAL BOND WITH THE PREY. So they can sit on it while it runs fast. And somehow the prey animal?? is cool with this?? and benefits from this relationship???
Literally how can you hate humans. Humans are possibly the most hilarious thing evolution has ever done.
other things humans have done
- eat poison plants, decide they like getting poisoned, and evolve the plants to poison them more
- evolve to not have hair, but they find mammals with thick fluffy hair and put the hair on themselves, and evolve the mammals to produce extra hair so they can both have a warm coat of hair
- split up their parasitic lice species into two separate species because they start taking other animals' hair and putting it on themselves so much
- learn how to set things on fire on purpose. maintain body temperature by just standing beside some wood that's on fire instead of literally any normal option
- figure out that their prey tastes better and is easier to digest when they hold it over a fire after killing it. get smarter because they digest food so good after it's been held over a fire.
- find a poisonous plant and try washing it in boiling water until they don't die when they eat it anymore
- go across the ocean by making a floating nest despite not being able to breathe underwater, drink ocean water, or even swim naturally
- drink milk from other mammals even though they can't digest it and it makes them sick. Evolve those mammals to produce more milk than their babies can drink so they can drink the milk. Some members of the species evolve to be able to digest milk because they were so hellbent on drinking it.
- find flowers, bugs and minerals that are nice colors and crush them up to try to turn other things that color
- eat mushrooms that make their nervous systems malfunction because they like malfunctioning their nervous systems
humans worldwide looking up into the celestial vault of stars a million light years away, separated from Earth by the deadly cold and emptiness of space: I bet there are guys up there to form social bonds with
the notes are so fucking funny
It states the people are impressive, not that the speech has to be. I don't give a shit about impressive people. I would LUXURIATE in making them listen to me saying "wiener' 1,200 times.
The 3.5 hour baby shower sounds like torment.
Sometimes u just gotta make yourself a quesadilla and move the fuck on
The worst part about this post??? People saying “with cheese!” Bitch cheese is literally in the word if it had no cheese it would be a dilla
throwing a couple tortillas with nothing in between them except mayonnaise and cooking those bad boys up
Well, you know, some bathroom graffiti offers insight.
Red marker handwriting on a bathroom wall. Text reads:
“Boss made a dollar Granddad made a dime But that was a poem From a simpler time.
Boss made a thousand Gave pa a cent But that penny paid the mortgage Or at least it paid the rent
Now Boss makes a million And gives us jack Smugly blames the workers For the labor that he lacks.”
And the words of the prophets are written on the subway walls and tenement halls.
you have to understand that there is an overlap between drag queens and trans women and between trans women and cis lesbians and between lesbians and drag kings and between drag kings and trans men and between trans men and cis gay men and between gay men and drag queens and between lesbians and bisexual women and between gay men and bisexual men and between lesbians and asexual women and between gay men and asexual men and between all sexualities and nonbinary people and between butches and transmascs and between binary trans people and genserqueer people.
basically what I'm saying is that we're all family. there aren't clear divides or walls that separate us. and that's the point. being easily separated into perfect neat little boxes is exactly what queerphobic people want. don't let your oppressers trick you into thinking your family is your enemy.
if you tried to map out our community, you wouldn't get a bunch of neat circles that don't touch or overlap or have any relationship with each other at all. you'd get this.
I think adults need summer vacation. Like let's just close down all our jobs for three months and play outside. Please. I'm so tired.
























