i present to you my magnum opus. cat girl back rooms
weed is a potential dragon element
Hermia gestured vigorously to her new dragon friend. "Then, once we make it to the throne room, Melody knocks the wizard dead with her poison breath!"
The rest of Hermia's party nodded, impressed.
Melody rolled her eyes and shook her head. "I can't do that."
"Of course you can. He's evil. He needs to die."
"Oh yes, of course he is, of course he does. But I mean I literally can't kill him with my breath."
"What do you mean you can't? All green dragons breathe poison."
Melody pinched the bridge of her snout and sighed. "And did you ever wonder what kind of poison we breathe?"
"...Really nasty toxic poison? My uncle got mercury poisoning from fighting Raddareth the Great, and he was wearing a gas mask and everything."
"Yessss, Raddareth breathed mercury vapours. My great-aunt breathes cyanide. But I can't breathe either of those things. It's dragon-specific."
"So you... Can't kill a charging army with one noxious breath?"
"No."
"But why do you put wolfsbane in your salads, if not to build up your, y'know," Hermia wiggled her fingers "Poison Reservoir?"
Melody grimaced. "Where do humans get these ideas? My poison doesn't just accumulate in some neat vat. It's all throughout me, in my blood and in my bones."
"Then why?? Wolfsbane??? It makes you sick????"
"I eat wolfsbane because it is tasty, little one. We're all poison-immune, regardless of personal affinity. Otherwise a simple bite or scratch from a family member would prove fatal."
Hermia's enthusiasm faded a little. "So, no breath weapon?"
As a way of explanation, Melody blew a little smoke towards the druid. Hermia's eyes widened and she froze in place for a moment. Then her nose twitched. She sniffed the air. A broad grin split across her face and her eyes squinched shut as she giggled.
"What the fuck? You're a weed dragon??"
did someone say weed dragon (🎨 fireflufferz)
i'm getting some mixed signals here, did this end up unflagged or is it still in the shadow realm
i cannot emphasize enough how much elon musk is very much not killing twitter on purpose. he is not that smart. you are giving him too much credit. he makes cars that melt. a few weeks ago a billionaire imploded several other billionaires and himself in the ocean because of this same brand of born-rich brainworms. destroying a social media site because of a petty, long held grudge over his paypal co-founders not letting him rename that to "X" is not a stretch.
i cannot emphasize enough how much elon musk is very much not killing twitter on purpose. he is not that smart. you are giving him too much credit. he makes cars that melt. a few weeks ago a billionaire imploded several other billionaires and himself in the ocean because of this same brand of born-rich brainworms. destroying a social media site because of a petty, long held grudge over his paypal co-founders not letting him rename that to "X" is not a stretch.
I have seen the yakuza line stickers so many times but they still make me laugh every time i see them
what emotion is this supposed to convey
These Jezebel commenters are right and they should say it
misskatelyndanger
I know you mean the Magazine, but it’s funnier to imagine you calling these two commenters Whores.
Battle Couple Battle Quarterfinals!
Bumbleby (RWBY) VS Hikaren (Shoujo Kageki Revue Starlight)
Skin against skin, butt and bone You're drawing by yourself so you must atone Boys or girls, when you draw their rears There's one rule that you must adhere
LET THE BUTTCHEEKS KISS THE FLOOR. LET THE BUTTCHEEKS KISS THE FLOOR.
LET THE BUTTCHEEKS KISS THE FLOOR.
Thank you, that mnemonic will be stuck in my head forever now.
"humans are naturally selfish and evil" factoid actually just statistical error. former united states president ronald w. reagan,
Whoa they are gonna electrocute my face, nice
Captain's log, stardate 2291.6. En route to deliver a crucial shipment of grain to a colony on Setlik II, we encountered something more pressing: a time traveler.
Boring people the second they see something a little creative,silly,experimental,or even just a little confussing: UHMM...⁉️ WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST WATCH 😂 WHAT WERE THEY SMOKING 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂🤣😂😭🤣😂🤣😂🤣🤣😂🤣😂😭😭🤣😂😭😂
*sidles up to you at the bar* would you like to hear my wise aphorism
only if it's actually wise. the last guy who asked me this had a pretty foolish aphorism tbh
oh… uhuh… *really should have prepared this ahead of time* never ignore… the melody of time… when your shoe’s untied?
*considers this aphorism sagely, sipping my horrible and bitter potion*
yes. there is wisdom in this. he whose shoes are untied must carefully mind the rhythm of his steps. bartender, another Wretched Potion, for my comrade here
*to self* holy shit… my aphorism… it’s wise!
I were inspired