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@flanneryannery

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It’s not hard for us to feel. Feeling is the easy part. Falling in love when we don’t want to, getting attached when we know he’ll leave us, believing him when we know he’s not honest. What’s hard is looking at someone you used to care about, someone you forced yourself to get over, someone you maybe haven’t even talked to in years, and not feeling anything. That’s what’s hard.
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give yourself permission. 

you don’t have to look for reasons to buy yourself a latte, to sleep in, to take time off training, to slow down. you are human - allow yourself to be. don’t go through life avoiding the things that would add a little extra happiness in your day because it feels undeserved. you are not perfect but that doesn’t mean you need rules. 

please don’t hold yourself together with strings of apologies and excuses. you are so much more than that. 

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reblogged

my heart was never really your home, but damn if you didn’t run away from it anyways. we were never really in love but the blood on my carpet doesn’t care about semantics. it just comes for you with sour in its jaw, with teeth in both of its hands. it says i’m sorry for how this happened, but i’m not sorry about the things i said. it says i’m not sorry for clawing my way out of you. it says you were only right about one thing and that is that i am stronger than you. it’s midnight and there’s no smoke on the roof. it’s midnight and nothing is on fire.

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Maybe we’ll meet again, when we are slightly older and our minds less hectic, and I’ll be right for you and you’ll be right for me. But right now, I am chaos to your thoughts and you are poison to my heart.