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fond of ambiguity

@firecoloredwater / firecoloredwater.tumblr.com

Para on AO3
I usually go by Para. Ace, aro, trying to write about eight different things at once. Genuinely confused about what followers are looking for, I have neither consistency nor tags.
Feel free to message me; if I am not feeling up to chatting I won't answer, if I am I will be happy to talk about almost anything that shows up here.

idk it just feels so good when you realize a fandom friend has become ur friend friend—y’know? like instead of only talking about ur common interest u start branching out and talking to each other about your lives, your other hobbies, and it’s even cooler to remain close if one or both of you lose interest in the fandom you met in. your bond, no longer dependent on the mutual love you had for some thing—now lies upon the kinship you’ve built. i think that’s beautiful

So with AO3 recommending locking your fics to help prevent scraping for AI use, I know a few people (myself included) who have locked down their fics. But it’s made me curious how many people are locking so…

Also reblog this and tell me in the tags why you do or don’t plan to lock your works.

For those of you that want to lock your works but don’t want to do each fic individually, here is a tutorial for how to lock all your fics at once.

hey all

so in a more practical application of the "larp a republican if you're gonna call them" post that got huge, North Carolina is about to have abortion access slashed if nothing's done about it.

SB20 got passed and went up to Gov. Cooper who vetoed it, but there's very very slight veto-proof supermajority in the legislature. Unless at least one Republican breaks ranks the veto will be overridden.

I made a google doc to organize, and you don't have to be a North Carolinian to participate:

Even if you can't participate, please share. A lot of people might lose yet more of their rights very soon.

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been a minute since i posted here…here’s an old wip excerpt

back when i first read these books i wanted more than anything to see a) some interiority in the dragon characters and b) a nuanced exploration of the bond between rider and dragon. i’d like to poke around with both of those in this piece about lessa and ramoth (assuming that i finish it)

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one more because why not. excerpt in which we’re reminded that most of lessa’s friends are dragons

this wip is an au of dragonflight that i’ve been mentally referring to as “f’laren’t,” lmao…because in addition to centering the story of ramoth and lessa, its overarching premise is “what if f’lar didn’t exist.” this dialogue exchange takes place just after robinton first plays the question song for lessa; the ensuing scene is one that tangles with the novels’ portrayal of green and blue dragons

What species of spider would you prefer to have live on you for the rest of your life?

Two facts, for clarity in the metaphor:

1: these are not superintelligent magic spiders and you are not a mutant that can control them. You are yourself, and they are ordinary spiders, which will do ordinary spider things like build webs and lay eggs and bite. Except that they live on you, now.

2: everyone has their own colony of spiders living on them. They will not judge you for being covered in spiders. They will, however, judge you for not having enough spiders, or not caring for your spiders properly, as well as for which species of spider you choose.

(Obviously I can't list every species of spider out there, so I'm just listing a few of my personal top choices + the reasoning behind them. Vote for the reasoning you would use, if the particular species isn't listed.)

To be clear: this is a metaphor about how I FEEL about gender, not any sort of objective reality or truth about gender or whatever.

I just really really hate being asked for pronouns because they're all wrong and 'no' is not an option.

I think part of the reason I read fanfic so much more and more easily than original/published fiction is because it’s so much easier to figure out whether I’ll enjoy a fic from the tags and summary than it is to figure out the same for a book.

By which I don’t mean the use of tropes, or even my own familiarity with characters and fandoms.  Those are useful too, but not what I’m talking about.  Novels have genres and tropes and character types too, and you can learn how to predict what’s in a novel based on summary and cover pretty well.

But fandom lets authors go wild with tags and summaries and author’s notes, so in fandom I can figure out not just what tropes and characters a fic contains, but the author’s exact attitude toward those tropes and characters as well, and how much they’ve written the trope/characters before.

That information is way harder to figure out for a published novel, because even if an author does write their own summary and design their own cover, they’re working within the constraints of making the summary Sound Like A Proper Novel Summary.

But that information can be really crucial to whether I enjoy a story.  So fanfic is safer, because I can tell whether I’ll like an author’s approach to a trope with like, 98% certainty even if I’ve never read them before, but with published fiction it’s like, 50/50.  No way to tell until I'm at least halfway through the book.

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...okay this is even less drabbleish probably but now I'm imagining the like. Scenario with Hashirama and Tobirama miscommunicating and both not trusting each other (specifically re: Butsuma needs to die) and then dropping Mito in the middle of THAT mess. Just, you know, because it wasn't complicated enough yet

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Fic Ideas That Haunt Me!!!!

The problem about having brainrot for your own fic is that I want to talk about it constantly but I don’t want to spoil anything but I want to talk about motives and characters and just the events but I want to preserve mystery and suspense

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Or, alternate funny version to the previous: any combination of Uchiha watching Tobirama fight and discussing their observations (gossiping/oogling shamelessly), after peace exists and they SHOULD technically probably help him, but... Tobirama can clearly handle it, no need to get in his way

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I once read that a drabble is 200 words or less. I will never beat those allegations.

...actually now that i think about it. did you have religion class in school? also was it mandatory??

extra points reblog and tell me where youre from in the tags because for us religion* is a non-mandatory class where in high school you don't get grades but extra points that might help you in other classes**

*and with that i mean Christianity Class because wow i love being in the same region where the pope is /s ** which is the only reason i kept attending

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Ooooo okay I am AWFUL at drabbles so this is more of a prompt in general with a side of hope that it's compatible with drabbles but: Hikaku, for whatever reason, watching Tobirama fight prior to peace, without any significant reason he should interfere (so like, Tobirama isn't trying to kill Izuna or an Uchiha client, probably)(maybe if the client is REALLY awful)

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Yeah... this one pretty much got me thinking right away so thanks.

Cw: Violence + Body Horror (canon typical)

That is a really cool program! I am so glad they are providing that service to people. Wildlife is not only an important part of our ecosystem, but very important to a person's mental health.

My only concern is whether or not the tree takes up too much space for wheelchair users/mobility aid users to be able to easily use the sidewalk. Some of the angles make it difficult to tell how much room there is between the person's front steps and the tree.

Again, absolutely FANTASTIC work done by those Philly Arborists, but I do hope they are taking that into account.

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honestly, why is the only language we have for sexual trauma that of rape and assault? there are so many kinds of sexual trauma that are done a genuine disservice by trying to grapple with them using the language of rape.

there's "i consented to this for self-destructive reasons," there's "i didn't know what i was consenting to because i didn't have enough experience to tell that i would be upset by this thing," there's "i initiated something that i now regret," there's dozens, even hundreds, of sexual situations that are traumatic and that need community support and care and some real trauma work to heal from, that just aren't accurately described by the language we have to discuss rape.

and like, trying to shoehorn them in under the umbrella of rape and assault often does a disservice to the victims trying to heal--trying to cast a sexual partner as a malicious perpetrator retroactively is often really psychologically damaging to someone who is experiencing a complex trauma around an experience they consented to, especially when the trauma victim themselves initiated the experience.

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i also think there's a counterintuitive thing where the pressure to label every traumatic or even just upsetting sexual experience as rape actually increases the amount of uncomfortable sexual situations a lot of us subject ourselves to--not to get personal or anything, but like, when i was deep in the depths of that kind of thinking, i had significantly more sexual encounters, on the regular, that left me stressed or depressed.

i was averse to safewording, because in my mind, "being upset during sex" was a "sign" of being raped, and i knew that i wasn't being raped and didn't want to put the responsibility for my discomfort on my sex partners. so i just... didn't safeword, and didn't talk about being uncomfortable when i was, because i didn't want to jumpstart the I Am Being Sexually Assaulted narrative when i didn't feel like it fit my experiences.

this also fed into my pure-O OCD tendencies--sex would constantly devolve into a mental obsession over "am i happy? do i feel comfortable? if i feel uncomfortable, i'm being assaulted. do i feel like i'm being assaulted?" just like. obsessing, on loop, over and over again. i highly doubt this would have affected someone who doesn't have pre-existing trauma and obsessive compulsions nearly as strongly, but i think it's important to illustrate that this sort of thing harms people with pre-existing sexual trauma more than anyone else.

i have now learned that i can express discomfort and genuine upset during sex and it does not need to be about me being sexually assaulted specifically, and this has reduced the number of sexual situations i am uncomfortable in on the regular down to zero!