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Fareli

@farelicristal

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I am a daughter of shame. I live in the shadows and I try not to bleed on my mothers carpet. My skin jagged and worn as if I have lived thousands of lives, in one body. I am flat. I am empty. This is all the world wanted for me. I pretend not to notice how quiet the sky is on a sunday morning, as if god had deserted me.

Hannah Green, from “Sylvia Plath Taught Me How To Disappear.” ©

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I am a servant for my mothers unhappiness. I can make myself smaller, mother, I can become quieter. I am a wound that you can’t stop picking. I take scraps from dinner as little parts of love. I know that I am not easy to love. I know I wear my sadness so visibly that you’ve become ashamed of me. Make me small, crush me up in the palms of your hands. Destroy me for breakfast and devour me for lunch, leave nothing left of me, not even for the birds. Eat me. Eat me up. It’s too late to apologise now, sorry means nothing when you’re choking on my leftovers.

Hannah Green, from “Are you still hungry, Mother?”

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“The contract between the author and the reader is a game. And the game… is one of the greatest inventions of Western civilization: the game of telling stories, inventing characters, and creating the imaginary paradise of the individual, from whence no one can be expelled because, in a novel, no one owns the truth and everyone has the right to be heard and understood.”

— Carlos Fuentes, Myself with Others

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“I will love you no matter where you go and who you see, no matter where you avoid and who you don’t see, and no matter who sees you avoiding where you go. I will love you no matter what happens to you, and no matter how I discover what happens to you, and no matter what happens to me as I discover this, and no matter how I am discovered after what happens to me happens to me as I am discovering this.”

— Lemony Snicket, The Beatrice Letters

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“You’re seeking something, but at the same time, you are running away for all you’re worth.”

Haruki Murakami

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“The less there was to see, the harder he looked, the more he saw.”

— Don DeLillo, Point Omega