@fancyflautist / fancyflautist.tumblr.com
love how wikipedia’s “List of unsolved deaths” starts at 11,000 BCE. like, I don’t think we’ll be cracking that cold case anytime soon.
the entire way this list is set up is VERY funny to me. like, yes, I guess 13,000 years ago WAS before the year 1900.
look, i’m just saying that maybe two 13,000 year old leg bones don’t constitute an “Unsolved death” like….who’s trying to solve that? who’s out here like yeah man we’re gonna get justice for your killers just you wait.
So I heard you wanted to learn some gay slang from the 18th century
You missed my personal favourite.
I hate to be That Guy, but... it’s 19th Century, not 18th Century...
This book was published in 1785.
idk when we decided that explaining yourself shouldn't be part of an apology but like. if someone was a dick to me and apologizes but I still don't understand why they did it I'm not gonna feel any better
"Sorry for hurting your feelings earlier. I was trying to say x, but I guess it came across wrong. I don't think you're stupid."
or
"Sorry I snapped at you. I didn't get enough sleep last night so my patience is a little low today."
is a better apology than
"I want you to know that I am sorry that my actions offended you. I take full accountability for my actions and I am listening and learning. I hear you."
Same energy
one time i texted my fireman dad saying something was “lit” and he responded “please dont say that”
My dad has a hard time playing magic the gathering with me cause he’s a dealer at a casino, and I see his soul leave his body every time I shuffle my cards.
here, have an extremely wholesome tiktok to detox your dash
If the ocean ever disappears DONT GO LOOKING FOR IT… go in the other direction
i know this sounds like a shitpost but isn’t this like, real advice regarding tsunamis
Yes this was about hurricane Irma it is not a shitpost
This is actually really good advice so let me elaborate a bit: if you notice the tide is retreating very quickly at a very odd time of day, get as far away from water and as high up as you can. I live along the ocean and a long time ago we had a small tsunami and a relative of mine tells me how her father saw the tides retreating so he just picked her up and just ran, which probably saved their lives.
So yeah DONT LOOK FOR THE MISSING OCEAN just run away
ocean not lost, ocean is actually winding up to kick you very hard in the nuts.
That last comment isn't even a joke they are literally part of the Rockefeller Philanthropy Advisors group.
sometimes i think about how sokka literally invented submarines and how aang is literally the avatar but when the both of them put their braincells together, they come up with ideas like writing a letter to katara from toph
*gas mask breathing noises* you know where the nearest taco bell is
*muffled plague doctor mask noises* down the block to the left
Ahead of their time
💯🙏💛🟨👍
Worst part about this is I've only ever used that yellow square emoji once and it was just to see how it looked. This isn't who I am. However, in retrospect, I suppose it is
Reading through the notes is a surreal experience please keep adding more to fuel my effervescent consumption of non descriptive emojis
💜🤞👈🎉🏳️🌈 (👀/💀 dont count bc they're tangential faces lmao)
Five asexuals are playing cards.
One starts to explain the rules:
I’d say no cheating, but there are already five aces at the table.
just a reminder that apparently anybody who isn’t ace cheats
this literally says the aces are cheating…………. because… you can’t have five aces in a deck………….it’s the Opposite of the second comment…
Reading comprehension on this site is piss-poor
How dare you say aces piss on the poor
Happy pride y'all
