castle // halsey
clerics
this is still such a good post
not now, kitten. daddy’s a shell of his former self
40,000 years ago, early humans painted hands on the wall of a cave. This morning, my baby cousin began finger painting. All of recorded history happened between these two paintings of human hands. The Nazca Lines and the Mona Lisa. The first TransAtlantic flight and the first voyage to the Moon. Humanity invented the wheel, the telescope, and the nuclear bomb. We eradicated wild poliovirus types 2 and 3. We discovered radio waves, dinosaurs, and the laws of thermodynamics. Freedom Riders crossed the South. Hippies burned their draft cards. Countless genocides, scientific advancements, migrations, and rebellions. More than a hundred billion humans lived and died between these two paintings—one on a sheet of paper, and one on the inside of a cave. At the dawn of time, ancient humans stretched out their hands. And this morning, a child reached back.
A Timeline of Humanity:
SHE THINKS HER LAUGH IS A SONG SO SHE SINGS BACK
Just an absolute fucking orb of a creature
Straw Hats ranked based on who would be most likely to eat human flesh
- Sanji
look. he's a chef. he hates wasting food. he will do ANYTHING to keep his crew safe. he has a complicated (i.e. insane) relationship with self sacrifice. His most formative childhood life experience was almost starving to death and being saved by a man who ate his own leg to survive. all I'm saying is that Sanji absolutely has a book at the back of his pantry labelled 'for emergencies' detailing several recipes (inc. wine pairings + side dishes) for human flesh. (worry not Straw Hats: the person Sanji would cook first is Sanji.)
2. Robin
It wouldn't even be a survival situation for her. I think if you served her canapes and told her they were made with human liver pate she would simply smile, say "how delightful" and eat them without complaint.
3. Luffy
Meat is meat innit.
4. Zoro
I feel like he would not seek out human meat, and he would be somewhat grossed out by it, but he is also a practical sort of guy, and if the choice were between starvation and munching on some marine goon, he could be convinced to fire up the barbecue. Would bitch about it the entire time between mouthfuls of rib.
5. Franky
He's a cyborg. He's chopped bits off himself and replaced them with cooler, more metallic bits. It's a bit morbid for a happy-go-lucky chappy like him, and he'd hold off for a good long while, but I think hunger would get to him in the end. Would apologise tearfully to whoever he was eating and thank them for being delicious.
6. Jinbei
Considers the idea of eating humans quite distasteful despite not being one himself. It seems disrespectful to him. Would probably find human quite tasty though.
7. Nami
She'd hate it, but she'd do it if she had to. Could be coaxed into it if Sanji made the meal look really pretty and luxurious so she can pretend she's at a high-end resort (and forget what she's eating) OR if it were someone she really, really hated. Survival instinct still trumps her grossout response.
8. Chopper
Remember when he thinks Luffy's dying and he's eating the fish Nami prepared and sobbing with every bite? Yeah.
9. Brook
Is already dead. Has no need to eat to stay alive. Also, he seems to have an inherent respect for the deceased, as evidenced by the way he treated his crewmates' bones. I just can't see him wanting to eat people, especially if he doesn't have to.
10. Usopp
Not gonna happen unless you go full Hannibal and just tell him it's beef. Which, coincidentally, is Sanji's plan.
worst college experience actually was people seeingme use tumblr and say 'haha oh i used to use tumblr we could follow eachother' and i open their blog and its like 700 artic monkeys band gif grunge images pastel moodboards and im sitting here hands folded like you are about to learn our uses of this site are wildly different and i just posted a photo of a buff man in a g string
i wouldnt lie online
2016-2021 Toyota Land Cruiser
hot take but i actively miss when tv shows were like 20 episodes a season. slow down. let me get to know the characters. let them do something dumb and not consequential to the plot for one fucking second i'm begging you.
look if chiropractics have helped you then i think that's great but i do think every chiropractor should be legally required to disclose the fact that the guy who invented it said he learned it from a ghost
portamento-system-deactivated20
the tags on this are so good
swiftphobia
Zoro: you’re a fucking goblin
Sanji:
Actually your society is the freaks for shooting everything that moves and burning half your "nature reserves" every year so that upperclass dandies can eat leaded pheasant. North Americans are the well adjusted ones here, your country has become a desolate suburban lawn in island form
