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the love in me...

@evian2mai-blog

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chuckakot
“I’ll kiss you endlessly as long as you hold me tight.”

— Chuck Akot, serre moi fort

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Time

I feel like I have so little of it. I need to do things. Like school, and clean. But all I want to do is spend every waking moment with you K. I know it's not healthy but I have less time left on my clock than you do. A lot less. So to me every second I can spend with you is precious.

I have promised you space so you can be productive. I know this is the right decision and it will benefit me as well. Just know that if I'm being honest with myself, I hate it.

You are the love of my life K and you are the most beautiful woman, inside and out, that the heavens have ever created.

I Love You

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Here’s what I’m trying to say...

I’ve wanted things I didn’t think i was worthy of. I wanted someone to love me so much they yearn for me. I’ve wanted someone to be so in into me that they think i’m the world. I’ve wanted someone to be so proud i’m theirs that they parade me around and tell the whole world about me. I’ve wanted everything you are and it makes me feel foolish to realize what i’ve settled for in the past. Everyday you show me something I’ve never realized i wanted from love. It gives me chills, the love you have for me. I fall more in love with you slowly each day…. It’s a journey to say the least. 

11/20/2018

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I am having the best time of my life with the woman I love. Does life get any better. I think not.

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My life is becoming more complicated...

I am in love with a beautiful woman who ive been dating for 5 months. She is smart kind and very compassionate. The thing is she has told me she can't love me the way I love her. I love the way she loves me already. I dont understand. She broke up with me last night because she wants her own space. Then a few hours later said she wantes to try again. I am happy she does as long as its for the right reason. I want her to be happy too. She laughs around me and we talk about everything. Maybe I'm just blund or stupid but I think she is happy and doesn't recognize it...

I will give you all the space you need my love... It doesn't mean we can't be together. You do you and I'll do me and I bet we still meet in the middle.

I love you K...

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“Many times in life I’ve regretted the things I’ve said without thinking. But I’ve never regretted the things I said nearly as much as the words I left unspoken.”

— Lisa Kleypas

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Be the reason someone smiles. Be the reason someone feels loved and believes in the goodness in people.

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I don’t think people understand that having a mental illness is literally being at war with yourself. It’s a feeling of discomfort in your own skin. It’s knowing what you should do but not being able to do it. It’s living hell and it’s not something that you can just stop.

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12/5/18

Their was this man. He was a handsome fellow. He was all alone in his world and content to stay that way. He had little idea that his heart had let out a net catch love in.

One day it happened, he was walking along and felt the sure sign tug in his heart from the net he carried with him. Within this net he found the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. He would find that she was smart, kind, compassionate, outspoken, and strong willed. Each of these is an amazing quality to find in someone, but to find all of these in a single person is so rare that the man knew he would never let her go willingly.

They were falling deeper and deeper in love when the man noticed a longing in his loves' face. He knew that look for he had it when he was young as well. It was the sense of adventure. To set out on one's own and know that you can do it. So the man decided that he would support his loves desire to explore. He so wanted her to stay but perhaps when she's done with her adventures she would return to him. Then they would be able to live their lives together forever.

If not then he would still be content in the fact that this most beautiful woman brought him so much joy....

I love you K