that spindly motherfucker

thanks for 1,000 followers, what do you guys want

heres some links to various social media accounts that i own

Redbubble: https://www.redbubble.com/people/protecteveryone/shop

Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@everyoneprotector?lang=en

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nonbinoverlord/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/EveryoneProtect

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPOjLXcswYZvszP-j3-cAHw

check them out i guess. it’d be cool of you.

All y’all out here in the TMA fandom talkin about icons like the guy who froze the key to the buried and that plumber who somehow managed to miss a wholeass murder-clown barn. Talkin about how you’d all like to see just once what would have happened if someone had straight up punched an avatar in the face.

How is no one talkin about my man Alexander Scaplehorn, the absolute legend who went to investigate the Trophy Room for money laundering in ep 54 and escaped by fuckin bodyslamming an avatar of the Stranger straight to the floor and then just fuckin hightailin it outta there. This man is a true badass and it’s a crime he doesn’t get mentioned in this fandom more.

You left out the best part which was that after he barely escaped from Monster Taxidermy Hell with his life, he wrote them a glowing report, because whatever creepy supernatural bullshit they were doing, they weren’t laundering money.

He body-slammed a Stranger Avatar in front of Breekon & Hope who he also escaped from by just being too nimble for them to grab. Remember this is the same Breekon & Hope with reflexes fast enough to snatch a butterfly out of the air. The combined forces of a Stranger Avatar, whatever the Angler Fish is, and Breekon & Hope were not enough to hold him. 

And the best part is. Despite seeing all the taxidermy come alive and barely escaping from 4 Stranger creatures he ends by saying he’s glad he remembered to bring his briefcase of notes with him because otherwise he would have had to go back!

The man was perfectly ready to walk right back in there if that’s what he needed to do to get his report filed. He really said ‘eldritch monsters or not ya’ll are getting your taxes inspected.’

Heritage post

well now im curious

the point of my masculinity and male positivity posts are to underline that masculinity and manhood are seen as a threat or in direct opposition to queerness, and that often times in order to be seen as queer you have to be partially or wholly feminine or gender neutral, or express your manhood in a feminine or gender neutral way in order to no longer be threatening, invasive, or a problem.

it is very difficult to exist in queer spaces as a hyper masculine person & a man. you're made to feel like you need to walk a tight rope feeling like you're inherently out of place, as if you existing and being masculine or a man in queer spaces makes others uncomfortable inherently.. just know that when i make positivity posts it is to remind us all that masculinity/manhood and queerness are not opposites and that you do not have to be a feminine man or masc person to be viewed/seen/heard as queer.

chasing men, masculine people, and masculinity out of queer spaces isn't helping anyone currently and won't help anyone down the line. please accept masc enbies, butches, bears, and masculine trans men with the same kindness, love, and passion that you do neutral and feminine people. that's the point when i make these kinds of posts. thank u

tags by @mac-n-cheese-flavored-arson

This is 100% thanks to the “No kink at Pride” people. Because?

They didn’t want these men at Pride. This is a leather daddy. (A rather covered-up leather daddy, because this addition doesn’t do anyone any good if it’s flagged into invisibility, but best believe that dude has hella abs under there, and a 50/50 chance of heavy tattooing.)

Here’s another. Again on the modest side for the sake of not triggering the automod thing, but you can see the interplay of queerness and masculinity—particularly a kind of forward, unashamed sexual explicitness, if you take a look at their crotches. That’s a kind of…for lack of a better term, mating display. “I have this and want to use it, or at least know there are men here fantasizing about me using it.” It’s akin to a woman wearing a plunge neck. You’re supposed to look, and if you’re a dude, he’d like you to like it.

These dudes (well, most of these dudes)? They’re bears. (I said “most” because the guy in the sunhat is technically a cub. He’s too young to be a bear.) The furriness and the beards and the age and the bellies ARE THE POINT. The name “bear” is an affectionate one. Literally “I’m big and hairy!” In the 00s there was a stereotype(?) that bears were also super-cuddly. I don’t know how true it is, but I can confirm every bear I’ve ever met gives amazing hugs. They will readjust your spine, your touch starvation, and your entire outlook on life.

None of this touches on the rather large queer kink communities around “men in uniform.” Military, police, construction, I can’t tell you how many strip nights I’ve been to at a local gay bar with a guy dressed as a sexy firefighter getting absolutely swamped with dollar bills and lap dance requests.

You aren’t seeing these men because they’ve been forced out of spaces THEY CREATED. One of the best things you can do is to help bring them back.

They’re not threatening, they’re not disgusting, they’re not somehow dangerous just by virtue of being open about their sexuality and sexual desire. They’re just human beings who human slightly differently than you.

But more importantly?

They’re family. And don’t you forget it.

Rejection of queer masculinity is also largely—but not solely—a problem among people whose only contact with queer folk is online. Yes, I am fully saying this is largely a Terminally Online problem. If you’re gathering with queer people in meatspace, you’re gonna see pretty quickly that queer male culture idolizes masculinity in the real world. We love men. We love masculinity—sometimes to a fault. We’re not all drag queens and Sassy Gay Best Friends. Hell, watch some gay porn and you’ll see this. Look at erotica drawn by & for gay men. You ain’t gonna see many bishies in women’s lingerie there.

What you’ve gotta understand is that Leathermen, biker gays, the uniform fetish, queer male BDSM clubs, and more arose after scads of queer men got a taste of being around each other all the time in WWII, came home, and found they still needed spaces like that. They formed clubs. They invented Leather. They developed cultures. And those things are all still around today.

Who do you think kept the queens safe at Pride parades in the days when the cops weren’t there as escorts but as crowdbreakers?

A TERF can’t go into a Leather club or gay bar and drip poison into the ears of baby queers nearly so easily as they can online. And seeing as how in much of the world it is still literally dangerous to be out, a lot of us don’t HAVE the option of going to munches or Leather bars or gay clubs and learning from our elders, who are, as you might expect, not nearly so active on the internet as said baby queers tend to be.

Capitalism and mass media don’t fuckin’ help here, either. Queer masculinity is so threatening to cishets that masculine queer men pretty much only exist on film as threats—basically as homophobic rape jokes. Muscle daddies don’t appear in ad campaigns. No one’s making cutesy coming-out/coming-of-age movies about cubs.

But we exist, and we have always existed, and we will always exist.

Broaden your horizons. Don’t buy our enemies’ bullshit. Queer masculinity is a good and natural thing.

(adventures of superman #522 & #533, impulse #23 & the flash vol 2 #189)

comp of bart being grabbed by the scruff by other heroee

me, pausing a new hope: do you see the armor luke's wearing? yeah so it belonged to trooper tk-421, who's sleeping with an imperial officer who is heavily implied to be grand moff tarkin. the author of the story where it happens hasn't explicitly confirmed it, but he's liked tweets saying the officer was tarkin and retweeted a joke about tarkin and a stormtrooper being a couple's costume, so it's pretty clear who the imperial is supposed to be even if disney refuses to let him confirm it -

my dad: olivia can you please press play

Luke sees Ezra for the first time, gets a crush on him and immediately goes to Leia to tell her about it and she's like "This guy?? Really??" (she also had a crush on Ezra a while back but Luke could pry this fact out of her own dead hands)

I am going to be fucking heart broken when Bode dies. Holy fuck he keeps talking about Kata (his daughter) and how he misses her and is doing everything for her and how he's worried about the empire hurting her and holy fuck I bet he dies in front of her. I'm going to be fucking inconsolable

I hope i kill that man myself. in front of his daughter. there is a thirty minute video of my reacting to what he did.

if you vote please reblog!

redoing some lore!

Update - Completely forget several categories of supernatural beings that will be mentioned in the story (Werefolk/the fae being major ones) so now theres more to put down lmao.

redoing some lore!

the fact that “the vibes here are rancid” is a power that the jedi actually have is insane to me

can you imagine being a normal dude and you’re getting help from this jedi, and this jedi dude’s like “head’s up, the next five minutes have the worst vibes imaginable” and you’re like “why?” and the jedi dude’s like “inscrutable cosmic power told me so, doesn’t get more specific than that”

like all these weird little men in weird little robes with glowy swords do is meditate because they have sorcerer-induced anxiety. yoda’s always fucking meditating on his little pillow because he has to figure out if he’s nauseous because the arcane will of all life itself is speaking through his midichlorians to warn him or if he just ate a bad burrito for lunch. the force is constantly dunking on these weird little men and telling them “something bad’s going to happen” and never explaining what’s going to happen. do you sense bad vibes because your washing machine is about to break and flood your apartment, or because the government you serve is about to turn into a dictatorship and mow your ass like grass? that’s for you to figure out

mace windu has Double Anxiety because every now and then he gets a pop-up that tells him when he is making a Significant Visual Novel Protag Choice

The Force: This Action Will Have Consequences!

Windu, downing three space ambien: great

Bail Organa probably heard that Hera Syndulla was pregnant and went into panic mode. This man has watched his wife go through multiple miscarriages and nearly died from her pregnancies. This man watched his friend die on the delivery table to bring her twins into the galaxy. He probably went into overprotective, panic mode and Hera probably let him once he explained.

Bail probably heard Hera went to scarif and had flashbacks to Padme returning from Mustafar.

He probably wished and prayed and begged the Force that it leave Hera and her child be because he didn’t want to lose his friend or watch Hera lose any one else.

Hera probably called Bail as soon as Jacen was born and told him about the baby. Bail’s last thoughts before he died was worry for Leia and gratitude that at least one of his friends survived childbirth with her child.

academic publishing explained

A) this is hilarious and kids are fucking incredible comedians with devastatingly frank takedowns of adult nonsense

B) for people in the tags, I am absolutely certain it’s not “I sell paper”!!! It’s “hice el paper” = “I made/did the paper”