Alan Lee’s illustrations for J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings.

“the term mpreg is inherently transphobic because pregnancy is gender neutral” I hate to tell you this but in the pregnancy fetish fanfiction community they also use the term fpreg

This shirt is made for him

we need to go back to hating tumblr. no more hellsite (affectionate). don't even think of giving these clowns your money. if i see you with a checkmark next to your name i'm opening fire

the post-automattic tumblr employees (automatticians, iirc) that are publicly posting as staff and trying to argue with tumblr users who vehemently hate the site are so adorable. this is how it's always been. users pretty much hate staff. this is why, in the old days, it was discouraged to identify as staff unless you had the stomach to put up with a bunch of hate mail and arguments.

you're also not going to win over any users by describing tumblrinas as ungrateful for the site's existence, or unreasonably angry over recent changes. you're just gonna look like a 30+ year old engineer taking pot shots at teenagers.

tumblr's current owner (automattic) got some trust back early in the acquisition when they greenlit some changes users had wanted, and ad-free went over mostly smoothly, but any trust you had was shattered with Tumblr Live. The snarky posts from automatticians are making it worse, the worst offender being the person you have running emporium.

this is how tumblr users have always acted before automattic came in and bought tumblr. this is not new. this is why users say things like "staff is out of touch".

y'all need to understand this before you try to snap back at angry users, or before you make vagueposts insinuating the tumblrinas are ungrateful.

maybe examine why tumblr users are angry, what they're angry with, accept they're valid reasons to be angry, and question why these business decisions are being made. like, "hey yeah why is tumblr live still there if everyone hates it?" or "why does moderation seem worse these days?".

then maybe if you understand what's causing the anger when users say "fuck staff" and you'll know not to take it personally. maybe you can take the urge to post snarky replies and redirect it to questioning your bosses' decisions to go ahead with these features that are universally hated

learn, adapt, overcome.

read, comprehend, post.

or just stop posting

transport...

Computer wiring tunnel inside an abandoned coal power plant, photo by Bryan Buckley [1280x854]

this image is so beautiful i remade it in doom 2 .

can we stop pushing people into boxes all the time. even lgbt boxes. im so tired of “oh u like crossdressing u must be gay/trans” like i get it but pls just let people behave and express themselves how they wanna without being labelled. some people just dont wanna be labelled and thats ok

i've been super stressed and overworked lately so i've been craving a cigarette really badly but i quit years ago and i don't really want to buy a whole pack when i know i'll only smoke one or two of them anyway, so instead whenever i feel like i can't take it anymore i just vividly imagine myself taking a smoke break in my head and the crazy thing is it actually makes me feel better. i feel like the 4chan burger tulpa guy.

using my psionic powers to give myself a tasty little treat without succumbing to the weakneses of the flesh

The Concept of Non-Photography:

Non-photography, theorized by François Laruelle, is about devorcing all context from a photgraph. There is no concept of a subject, photographer, composition, pretext, or context. It exsists in a void as a sort of non-thing, as if there was no sentient being able to percive and analize it. It exsist’s merely as an aeasthetic, but not even really as an aesthetic because that is a philosophy in itself.

He states that the photograph is not a picture of reality or even a copy or abstraction. It is a fiction that is “wholly real but in its own mode”- the fictional realm. The photograph is unique unto itself, an unlimited opening into the world occasioned by lights and shadows in time, but is in no way constrained by either the experiential universe or the theoretical and art historical preconditions set up for it.”

american dune: burger is the stomach filler that brings total satiation

I want to bleed out to death in that room

why is “report hate speech” not one of the default options with “report spam” instead of “report sexually explicit material”. i’m not a cop so i don’t care if people post hole & pole but i would love if i didn’t have to explain every time why it’s bad when there are nazis

you can really feel that the first deus ex was developed in austin texas and all the sequels in the french-canadian exclusion zone

"what does this mean" francophones have a david cage level understanding of reality while texans have the true libertarian conspiracy mindset

Tumblr kept cutting off the little sound at the end that I believe to be the very funniest part but I think I got it now. Now you can hear the little plop.

The two year-old is now a solid two and a half. Just now, he was sitting on the couch playing with his pretend flip phone and he frowned and said “for gods sake. My battery is empty.”

The other day at breakfast I asked him if he was going to eat any more of his oatmeal and he said “no, I think I’m just gonna move on with my life.”

Today we were walking along and he asked me “How many Octobers is it today?” I told him it was the 21st. 

He tried a bite of his hot soup at dinner and made a face and said “Mama, my soup is a little too temperature for me.”

Upon being served 1% milk for the first time, instead of his regular 2%: “is this water?”

Me: “no, it’s milk”

Kid: “but are you sure?”

Came up to me the other day, the middle of his pants totally soaked, and said “mama, I’m having a situation called ‘I peed in my pants.’”

I don’t think I even told you guys about the six months he spent saying “fuck” instead of “truck.”

I have to laugh at the folks in the notes claiming this is fake because “no 2-yr old is that advanced”. My guys, I work at a daycare almost exclusively with 2-3 year olds and let me tell you some of the wild shit I heard this last week alone,

“Uhhh, i ASSUME we’re going to the playground soon??” -2.5 year old girl

“[3 year old boy] pushed me because he doesn’t have a manners.” -2 yr old girl

“Did you spill your water?” “No no no no it’s not a concern” -2 yr old boy (while running away, dripping wet)

Kids are hilarious and smarter than you think

If you don’t have a lot of interactions with young children:

All this, and also, they can tell you lots about their favorite things. My 2 year old nephew can tell you all about Star Wars (the 8 movies he’s seen at least) and loves going out of his way to bring up how Anakin was good and bad and good again when he died. Trust me, little kids learn and mimic and reenact all the things they get attached to. Also, he named his first fish Jengo Fett, and all following fish Boba Fett, so juries still out on how much he understands clones.

Kids pick up the language that’s used around and to them. Mannerisms too. They are tiny, efficient mimics and it will come out at the WEIRDEST times. Young kids will ABSOLUTELY say all the stuff listed here.

My cousin was somewhere between two and three, and I’d just arrived at her house, and she’s animatedly telling me a story of some kind, and I listen as I make my way through the house, get to the couch, and kick my shoes off. She stops dead in the middle of her sentence, puts her hands on her hips, levels me with a glare the likes of which I haven’t seen since, and goes, “WHAT are they doing there? Do you think the box at the front door is for DECORATION?”

Her mum, standing in the kitchen and watching all this, was GOBSMACKED. Apparently she said that exact phrase more often than she realised, and her kid had picked it up verbatim and started using it on unsuspecting guests (me).

(I got up and put my shoes in the box at the front door immediately)

My family’s lore includes the time my mother offhandedly said to Cousin’s son–who was maybe five–that Cousin’s wife certainly did have strong opinions about some minor thing, and the kid let out a sigh and said, in the driest and flattest and most world-weary tone you’ve ever heard, “Tell me about it.”

once i was helping with a class of 3 year olds and during drawing time one girl asked for a lion, specifically a lioness. i drew it and she just looked in silence so thinking she wanted a more liony lion i was like “do you want me to draw a boy lion next?” and she gives me this 🤨ass affronted look and says “umm she doesn’t NEED a man.”

Kids will do three things reliably:

Yeah dude that’s what happens when you’re on the other side of the con