EmbersOfStardust

The elevator at the center of the Earth

radio is kind of wild really, the first thing we did after discovering an ethereal field that permeates the universe is infuse it with music.

"Kill them with kindness" WRONG. drop the opera house chandelier on them.

always remember the Final Girl Code:

- do it alone

- do it scared

- do it with a knife in your hand if you have to

Rip to the queen but I can't stop having a fat ass

Every time I'm having a bad day I come back to these posts I have a feeling they get funnier every time I see them

to my beloved mutuals, I am asking-- nay, begging-- you to come help me finish this stew. my roommate can't eat it and I only know how to cook for a small army. i can offer a sourdough roll and potentially a slice of orange cake for dessert. please consider my offer.

yours truly,

narwhaled

When I have too much stew (which I always do!) I make a quick savory butter crust, add a bunch of eggs to the soup, put the crust and the new quiche mix into the muffin pan. YES! THE MUFFIN PAN! Then I bake them into mini quiches (with parm, mozzarella, or mexican cheddar depending on the style of the soup) and I put it in the freezer, so in the middle of the day, I have a little mini quiche snack for brunch!

So yummy! And never any wasted soup!

you are thinking in 6D

This blew my mind

being a horror fan that experiences panic inducing paranoia fucking sucks like ill just be like wow i cant wait to go watch scary shadow creature video number 74 and then spend the rest of the night clutching my phone with the flashlight on and playing five nights at freddys 4 in real life

like im aware that watching horror stuff at like 3am is going to make me think that slenderman is in my kitchen but also im a dumb bitch who sees scary video thinks yay i love scary video :) and immediately watches it

Fascinated by what the draws you people to horror content

i like when theres some kind of creature or perhaps a guy

Robot characters who are given names like SL-308-62 but instead of their human friend going Well let's call you Sally for short, they instead ask the other if they Like their current name.

"Do you like your serial number?" they ask. "Yes, quite. It reminds me of who I am" the robot replies. "I have heard others like me go by different names after some time, and maybe one day I'll choose one for myself, too. But right now that is my full name, yes" they continue.

Because it's not your decision to make whether or not the robot will receive a new name. It should be theirs only. What's the difference? One is more complex and the other is simplified. They were both given by strangers instead of themselves.

"62 will do," they conclude. "It's my model number - there will be no other 62 after me."

Robots who instead start assigning numbers to their human friends

“Not that I mind,” I tell SL-308-62 one afternoon as we enjoy our shared lunch break (I have my packed lunch, and 62 has connected themself to their portable power bank) “but why do your call me ‘four’?”

The LEDs along 62’s appendages twinkle- a tell that they’re mulling over an answer.

“It’s a nickname,” they explain, “you are my fourth acquaintance aboard the station, and I’ve assigned you a serial number. Your full designation is F-001-04.”

“What does the ‘F’ stand for?” I ask, curious and charmed.

“Friend,” SL-308-62 says, their tone fond. “It stands for friend.”

Hard at work at the yaoi factory

They fucking called fujOSHA on us

I’m all scratched up and I can still taste spray paint in my mouth and my husband almost fell out of a tree BUT THE GHOST SCULPTURES ARE FINISHED!

They’re finally finished and I’m so happy with them!!

Some progress shots:

Wow!!!

Unemployed people are like im late for four o clock blanket time

"I'm going to play Dark Urge, I'm going to play a Drow, I'm going to play a Half Elf Cleric of Selune-" No. I grow tired of filling Faerun with hotties and encouraging my party's fatherless behavior.

To remedy this I have made Your Dad, the ultimate 1:1 replica of the average New Jersey father to save the realm and put a stop to my party's sad, horny business.

And before you can even ask "oh what is the Guardian Your Mom or something" of fucking course she is you fool

i love being up early but i love being up late. and i love getting lots of sleep. what now.

I love how intricate asexuality can be. No sex at all? Sure! Just want to watch? Brilliant! Only comfortable with topping? You go girl! Only rarely feel aroused and when you do it's very touch and go? Wonderful! Kinky but not in a sex way? Coolio! Queerness is full of nuance and people are complicated and things never live in a vacuum!!

i must not get takeout. takeout is the wallet-killer. takeout is the little-death that brings total obliteration. i will face the kitchen, fridge, and pantry. i will make choices about what to cook and then execute them. when hunger is gone there will be nothing. only i will remain.

employees should be allowed to steal, actually

idk. yesterday was a slow day and at the end of it, I still stared into a cash drawer, one of three, that had more than my rent in it, even if you only count the 20s. I spent a lot of that day trying to calculate in my head how many hours of work equal one pair of pants, let alone how many hours of work equals the fun thing I want to do next month.

I feel a cough coming on, because I work in a drug store, and all of my customers are sick. I always feel a little bit sick, now. I can't afford to eat well enough to keep my body healthy. Cough medicine is worth two hours and 20 minutes of work. Our store probably bought a case of cough medicine for they price we're selling one box. If this cough gets worse, I might have to call out, which will cost me more than the medicine in the long run- but that doesn't give me the money to buy the medicine right now. I stock a case onto the shelf. I don't buy any.

A mom wrangling three crying, sick kids enters my line and sets two types of children's medicine down, says they're both on sale and thank god for that. I ring her up, and she gets very quiet, because she misread the sign, and her total is twice as high as she was expecting. Her youngest screams in the cart, because she's burning up with fever. Her mother very quietly asks, please, she's so sorry, if I could please take the more expensive one off her total.

I agree, I move the box below the counter, and when she's not looking, I slip it into her bag. I pray as hard as I can that if she notices the "mistake" she says nothing, because I so desperately want her to have that medicine. The store has lost profit at the cost of a child's health. I don't bat an eye. This is a terminable offense. If I'm presented with the same situation tonight, I'll do it in a heartbeat.

The myth of evil employees stealing from the company falls apart the second you realize the company would shoot you dead to make a profit. This isn't two equal players, one of whom is stealing from the other. This is someone fighting for survival versus someone fighting to make an extra million. It's not equal.

Employees should be able to steal, actually.

Bro I teared up oh my god bro

In love with this random guy who had a lock slapped on his storage unit for not paying its rental and not only did he ignore management and took his stuff out without paying, but also chose to steal the lock itself and send it to the LockPickingLawyer along with a confession letter

X

@theoutcastrogue

cant believe you didnt include the full sentence

People always focus on the "lockpicking" part of his name and ignore that the lockpicking lawyer is, indeed, a lawyer, and can tell you exactly which crimes you committed in getting this lock to him

a real blorbo is someone you can both write a lengthy and serious/sad analysis on yet also constantly and i mean constantly make stupid jokes about

oh and also there’s gotta be at least one thing they should be locked up for