me: hmm time to google something
google every time: can i PLEASE have your location PLEASE 🥺🥺🥺 I need to know where you live so BAD 😫😫😫😫 Where do you fucking from?????? 😩😩😩😩😩😩
Imagine being buried alive and then seeing this little guy with a backpack suddenly arrive
It gets better. The little backpack has a two-way radio.
So you’re trapped under rubble, and then a rat shows up. Flicks a switch on its little tumtum. And starts talking to you.
until you said that it never occurred to me that the woman in STEM was the scientist and not the rat. i was just like “hell yeah, this rat is a powerful woman pioneering lifesaving technologies as a rescue ranger”
why are we sleeping on this
I didn’t miss that social cue I just thought it was stupid
‘i saw your social cue but am ignoring it in the hopes you learn to use your words and communicate like an adult. hope this helps’
Yeah I’m a marvel fan. I love to marvel at the beauty in the world around me
listening to fleetwood mac is like. i don’t know this song but let’s give it a shot. oh wait i do know this song. i’ve heard it a million times and always liked it, i just didn’t know the name. on some level i kind of assumed that song was just an ambient part of the world the way the sound of the wind or birdsong in the trees was but apparently it’s by fleetwood mac. neat.
As someone who works w animals “animals are not mindless automatons, they actually do have feelings and individuality and are capable of feeling acute physical and emotional pain and of forming deep attachments with other animals and people” and “animals are not human infants and have a limited capacity to communicate with humans so you have to familiarize yourself with their boundaries bc if they feel threatened or overstimulated they will fall back on their basic instincts and if you fuck around you are going to find out” are statements that can and should coexist
let me tell you something, as a bitch who went viral for her cunty post about the met gala back in 2018: i will always, always, always tolerate ugliness so long as it’s undeniable that a choice was made. when it comes to celebrities paying through the nose to wear costumes and stunt, i want audacity. i want gull and i want gumption. lil nas x looks like the silver surfer got his hands on some nerds rope. pedrito has got his bare thighs out at the gig. doja is serving animorphs realness and you know what? i respect it. in fact, i adore it. because do you want to know what’s exponentially worse than being a lil ugly? being that rich and being that spoiled for wardrobe options and nevertheless committing the unforgivable sin of being boring !!
as Simone Weil said, 'Let us love this distance, since those who do not love each other are not separated.'
you can tell the internet is objectively worse than it was 20 years ago because when you google “[song name] guitar tabs” there’s four different websites trying to sell them to you via some fucked up proprietary software rather than a geocities site like “mike’s [band name] tab emporium” with .txt files