Entry Level Gipster Harbage

legit the best advice i can give you: feed your friends

any time someone is in any kind of crisis or upheaval, offer to feed them. tell them they don’t have to choose what it is if they can’t make decisions, just ask about allergies and preferences and tell them you’re just gonna make food happen at their house.

friend having a baby? delivery gift certificate to order food to the hospital after the kid shows up.

someone’s relative passes away? offer to make them dinner.

buddy gets laid off? ask if you can order them lunch.

pal stuck in a depressive episode? offer to drive them to fucking mcdonalds, if that’s what they want.

people in crisis are tired and sad and angry and the last thing most of them are doing is thinking about feeding themselves. so if you have the ability or time or money, providing that is always, always a good move.

legit i do this all the time, and it is 100% always appreciated. i have taught all my friends that when something happens, we feed each other. it makes people feel extremely cared for, and I cannot recommend it enough.

This is really important: tell them they don’t have to choose what it is if they can’t make decisions

Decision fatigue is such a thing.

Much as I adore hippos, this is undeniably just. (via @persian-slipper)

Relatable

some of y’all’s sex drive is higher than your will to live & it shows

New York Italian furry man that is huge and built like a brick house is like. Bara bing bara boom.

You're just jealous that this is gonna do numbers once it hits the large man fandom

THIS OFFICE HAD ITS BLINDS UP AND THIS IS WHAT I SAW

i’m losing my mind. this is a high rise office building on the upper east side of manhattan. and the only piece of art on the wall in this office is a bikini clad anime girl with humongous bazookas that are bouncing out of sync. this can’t be real someone wake me up

I know this print, it’s actually considered a fine art piece! It’s clearly based on Takashi Murakami’s live-sized statue ‘Hiropon’:

Which, yes, she’s skipping rope with milk that she’s lactating from her bazongas. It’s actually part of a set, the other one being titled ‘Lonesome Cowboy’:

Which features a Cloud look-alike lassoing with his cum. 

Murakami is well known for taking ‘low art’ subject matter (anime, hentai, penises) and placing them in ‘high art’ contexts. I actually saw Hiropon in personal with my own two eyes at the Denver Museum of Art back in 2009. A lot of what he does is satirical, and it’s honestly pretty funny to see pictures of his artwork in American museums, surrounded by confused white baby boomers. 

That said, without the context, it DEFINITELY slaps you in the face and makes you question what the fuck is going on. Had I not found out who he was in college, Hiropon would still haunt me as the most confusing thing I’ve ever seen in a museum. 

god thank you for explaining this but also i’m still being slapped in the face as i type

“phones are disrupting natural sleep cycles” I mean true but also bold of you to assume I had one before the tech boom lol catch me out here reading chapter books by the light of my light up pens in the third grade

is there a word for when you're a masochist but you need to be able to fight back about it. like you can only have sex with me if you defeat me in single combat first.

telling someone i enjoy getting beat up and physically overpowered and they're really into it until i lead them to an empty parking lot and tell them to put em up

wait this is just fight club

Sorry to make an MCU joke in 2023 but

every time i start to feel cringe for being too deep in the hyperfixation i remember the intense depression i have waded through and have to remind myself that enjoyment is fleeting (so grab it with both hands), and life is for loving (so hold that love close), and if anyone thinks i’m cringe they must not be having a very good time (and i hope they can find a good time soon).

"Thoughts on women?" Yeah pretty much constantly

Level of respect a class of teens I have to teach art to have for me when I walk in: 0%

Level of respect after I draw sasuke from memory on the whiteboard: beyond anything you could possibly imagine

the true reason i rarely teach classes is to keep my ego at bay

sometimes when I'm bored, I go through the list of recent bad faith Wikipedia edits that have since been reverted. a lot of them are politically contentious/offensive topics that attract crazies and trolls in general, but sometimes there are completely innocent inoffensive articles that people attack for no reason. some guy yesterday vandalized the article on the chemical element francium

Francium IS a stupid element. It has a half life of 22 minutes and barely exists at all, only naturally occurring as a product of the extremely rare alpha decay series ²³⁵U ➝ ²³¹Th ➝ ²³¹Pa (𝜷 decay) ➝ ²²⁷Ac ➝ ²²³Fr (1.38% chance). There’s less than a gram of it on earth at any given moment. It has no uses to anybody and it isn’t even the most reactive group 1A element due to relativistic effects fucking up its electron binding energies. Stupid substance.

If you somehow asked a genie to get you a gram of Francium in a sealed vial so you could do an experiment with it, the genie would just give it to you because the enormous amount of radioactivity it produces would instantly vaporize the sample and cook you alive. Absolute dogshit isotope and its synthetic siblings are just the same but worse

found the guy

"am I being annoying" are you aware that my heart is trying to crawl out of my chest to get to you

as soon as i figure out whether there’s any practical difference between ‘that’ and ‘which’ in a sentence, you’re all finished

“That” is if the clause specifies which one, “which” is if you’re giving extra information.

“She took the bag that contains the loot” means that she took one of several bags, in particular, the one that happens to contain the loot.

“She took the bag, which contains the loot” means that there’s only one bag you might be referring to, and that the fact that she took it is important because it contains the loot.

Also, there’s a comma before “which” but not before “that.”

you’re all finished

ok.

Ecosocialist praxis

I support you poison Ivy

Reblog if you support Poison Ivy

That’s my girl.

Throwback Thursday: It was 5 years ago when we were celebrating award season for The Shape Of Water, and I got to live my dream of being in an old musical dance number (dressed as an Amphibian Man, of course) with the amazing Sally Hawkins.

My favorite pirate joke is “why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet? Because they spend years at c” not because it’s THAT funny but because it’s a relatively simple joke that nobody ive told it to has ever correctly guessed the punchline for because they all think it’s gonna be a joke about arrrr

Another classic is

“Why couldn’t the pirates play cards? Because the captain was standing on the deck!”

For more hilarious pirate jokes like these go to google and type pirate jokes into the search bar and click search

Sorry for the double reblog I just wanted to let everyone know that I told the first joke to my dad and he hung up on me.

the way ivan aivazovsky looks at the sea…i think…i think that’s what love looks like.

love is surrounding yourself with people who see you this clearly

Still the freakiest fact about him is that despite being as tall as a person or more, he banged out these beauties in a day or two at most (and smaller ones ina matter of hours). The longest he spent on a painting, at age 81, to make his largest ever painting, was TEN DAYS:

It is 2.9×4.3 meters large. That’s 9'4"×14'1" for people in other measurement systems. It’s HUGE. There are artists out there that spend years on paintings much smaller than this. He was not one of them.

He also didn’t only paint the sea, but he MOSTLY painted the sea. Very few people could draw light filtering through waves the way this guy did and apparently it was tied into his layering technique that allowed him to paint so goddamn fast.

He is obviously my most favorite painter ever.

!!!